Confused

[Harleyyy]

Hello all, i have been suffering from depression for some time now, even since i was little i had this weird sad dark side to me but some recent events triggered it into getting bigger.
I cry endlessly all night, every night, i dont wish to eat anything, i am always sad and lash out even on the smallest of things, it has almost been an year of this being this severe and it only gets worse,
There is alot to be grateful for me, i have a roof over my head, good food, a good family even though its tough with them some time,
I feel ashamed to be like this when i come under privileged class
But its getting exhausting now. Therapy is not for me. I have tried everything.
I gave up on everything
Killing myself seems to be the only way out now but i feel ashamed to be putting my family through this. They deserve better. It gets harder everyday.

 

[noaccount]

I hope that maybe there could be some ways besides therapy to explore where your pain is coming from, what it means to you, what would be better for you, if therapy hasn't helped. (It didn't help me either.) I really think you deserve to be free from feeling trapped by shame also. Welcome, sorry you're here, etc.