Venting Confused

[hopeless08]

Hey guys,
Haven't posted in couple of days cause I'm getting to a point where I feel like I keep saying the same things, trying to find methods and always end up disappointed. It's so frustrating.
I know you guys are always willing to listen but sometimes I feel like I'm a bother to keep complaining and that people are going to get tired of me.
Im so exhausted, in so much pain and I'm terrified that I'm going to have to endure this pain forever, that scares me more than anything.
I was thinking about the fentanyl overdose but don't know where to find a dealer and if I did, I wouldn't know what they're actually giving me but I don't understand cause I watch endless documentaries about the fentanyl crisis, how people are dropping like flies unintentionally. They also say that almost every drug is being laced with fentanyl now because it's cheap, so I'm confused.
Just can't take anymore!!!!

 

[Imprisoned]

Don't worry, I often feel like a bother as well whenever I vent about my frustrations. It's almost like it's... very repetitive idk. I'm probably more sick of it than the person listening lmao. As for the fentanyl thing, I'm not sure. I have ZERO real life connections and have no idea where to start in terms of finding some dealer. I'm strongly considering either SN or N if possible. It's just hard because it can be a long wait for stuff to arrive whilst my mind, heart, and body all want to be dead NOW. Idk man, I can't take this shit anymore either. It's hard to find sources for stuff because self righteous assholes want to force us to stay alive against our will, all while refusing to fix the conditions and reasons that drove us to this decision in the first place. I'll have to keep researching..

 

[FuneralCry]

It's just horrible to me and cruel how peaceful suicide is so inaccessible, we really shouldn't have to struggle so much to leave this existence. It'd be such a relief having the option of a guaranteed, peaceful exit.

 

[hopeless08]

Don't worry, I often feel like a bother as well whenever I vent about my frustrations. It's almost like it's... very repetitive idk. I'm probably more sick of it than the person listening lmao. As for the fentanyl thing, I'm not sure. I have ZERO real life connections and have no idea where to start in terms of finding some dealer. I'm strongly considering either SN or N if possible. It's just hard because it can be a long wait for stuff to arrive whilst my mind, heart, and body all want to be dead NOW. Idk man, I can't take this shit anymore either. It's hard to find sources for stuff because self righteous assholes want to force us to stay alive against our will, all while refusing to fix the conditions and reasons that drove us to this decision in the first place. I'll have to keep researching..

Thanks for understanding and yes I'm so angry at the world as well. I would go with sn but apparently that's also hard to find a source and whether it's reliable, also if it's from abroad they're will probably be issues with customs.. But It's so frustrating cause I can't take anymore ether. I WANT TO GO NOW…. It's torture we are being put through day in and day out…..