Comforting To Have Your Method/Tools Ready

[DoneWithThis]

Didn't know where to throw this, so, just went with a new thread.

Do the rest of you find comfort in having your method ready for when you're ready to CTB? Just knowing that you could do it tonight, or tomorrow. Or does it just make you more anxious, having the stuff there, and not doing it yet?

I do realize that I'm a bit drunk. But I just wanted to share this with someone. To say it out loud. Because I finally got my check, did my extensive research, and ordered everything I need. So, I'm kind of happy about that. I don't have the stuff yet, but it'll be here soon enough. And somehow I feel a sense of comfort in that. Having all the things necessary and ready, It puts me at ease a bit. So, I have two methods in mind. Full hanging and SN. I've kind of flip flopped between the idea of them. But more than likely I'll go with SN. And for some reason, that should go wrong, a full suspension hanging. I probably would of gone straight for a full hanging but after all my attemps with partial suspension, and that full hanging/short drop that turned into a suspension hanging (cotton rope plus too much slack) I rather go with SN first. So, hopefully I'll have everything soon.

Feel free to criticize my equipment. Feel free to provide any constructive criticism.

For full hanging:
12 mm static rope. Amazon. 3% elasticity. Plus, I'll use a folded towel for padding.
Diameter wise, it's thinner than my cotton rope but I'm hoping that will help to localize the pressure on my carotid arteries. 3% elasticity seems pretty static to me. Will use slipknot. And will apply soap to make sure it cinches up faster.

SN method:
SN Amazon
Food scale Amazon
Domperidone (30 x 10 mg tablets) Ebay
Ranitidine acid reducer (50 x 150 mg tablets) Amazon

I was kind of going to go crazy and get an endless ratchet and the cornhole bags for the Night Night (blood choke method). Just for shit and giggle experiment with it. But realize it was pointless, I don't want to experiment with CTB, I just want to CTB. Plus, come on, theirs no way I could fail both SN and full hanging.

I know it's kind of silly to share this but ... Just wanted to share it with someone. Big hugs people.

 

[fister]

Oh yes having the means and even simply the plan provide comfort.

 

[painoflife]

I feel it puts me at ease to know I could do it whenever I am ready. Having whatever is needed takes away some stress

 

[DoneWithThis]

To me it feels like a big relief. Knowing I wont have to improvise, or scramble around for things last minute.

 

[SinisterKid]

I think I answered in a similar thread to this one. I now feel I have some control back. To know that I can go tomorrow if I choose to is a great comfort for me.

 

[DoneWithThis]

It's crazy the amount of threads on here.

Having your equipment ready. Your method ready. Making sure everything is as perfect as possible. In some ways it feels like a ceremony, like setting up your own funeral.

 

[Dawn0071111]

Yes. I have my method carefully hidden. It does bring a sense of comfort and CONTROL. ITs like "in case of emergency break glass." Unfortunatly though since I want to be considerate of the person who lives with me, I have chosen not do carry out my attempt at home which makes my plan more complicated. But yes. It's nice to know that if I ever needed it. It is always there.

 

[DoneWithThis]

I get that. You gotta weigh that whole being considerate vs bring practical thing. And that sense of control thing, I completely agree. We might not be able to control anything in our lives. Not even the breaking point of when we'll finally ctb. But at least we can have something ready. And that's the best we can do I feel. And even though we want to ctb. Contemplating death in that way. Might just give the rest of our days here, maybe not by much, but at least a little bit more happiness. Knowing that when the time arrives, that we have the ticket to exit tgr5emus4mrht park.

 

[FF777]

Yes it can be comforting and add a sense of control and relief..
However I haven't obtained the supplies I will need yet because I wanted to guard against me just having a really bad random day and rashly deciding to ctb with out giving it more calm-headed thought first..

Method I'm probably going to use is h2s, so really it feels like I could do it pretty quickly if I needed to; Just go to a couple of different stores to get the things I would need to mix.. I was thinking of doing the helium method at first, but there is just some thing I like about h2s method.. Easier to get the supplies, easier to execute, and you can definitely tell it is working instead of having to do more guess-work like you have to do with helium method..

 

[TAW122]

It is very reassuring for me. My method is the firearm, specifically a 12 gauge shotgun with 00 buckshot. I have everything ready and can simply just off myself/check out of this hellhole any time. Just depending on the circumstances and time. If things get bad enough, I always have a way out. I often try to mitigate and improve the situation, but do have criteria and limits of how much I'm willing to put up with. If it gets bad enough and things become untenable, I'm out.

 

[LifeOver]

At one point I felt comfort too when I ordered a Nitrogen tank and it arrived. However, this comfort led to me delaying my ctb, which ended up with my family discovering my hidden tank before I got a chance to use it. Now I've learned my lesson to not order any big and obviously suspicious material, and I am considering drugs like N instead. And when I get it, I will not feel any comfort until it's in my stomach.

 

[DoneWithThis]

O

At one point I felt comfort too when I ordered a Nitrogen tank and it arrived. However, this comfort led to me delaying my ctb, which ended up with my family discovering my hidden tank before I got a chance to use it. Now I've learned my lesson to not order any big and obviously suspicious material, and I am considering drugs like N instead. And when I get it, I will not feel any comfort until it's in my stomach.

Oh! That sucks. Kind of reminds me of a thread I read here about what you'd say if you got caught trying to ctb. I know it doesn't matter anymore but.... Any chance you used a good excuse?

It is very reassuring for me. My method is the firearm, specifically a 12 gauge shotgun with 00 buckshot. I have everything ready and can simply just off myself/check out of this hellhole any time. Just depending on the circumstances and time. If things get bad enough, I always have a way out. I often try to mitigate and improve the situation, but do have criteria and limits of how much I'm willing to put up with. If it gets bad enough and things become untenable, I'm out.

Wow. That's one sure fire way to go. No pub intended. Talk about going out in a blast. Pun intended. Whether it's for tomorrow, next week, or whenever. It's nice to know you have a Get Out of Jail Free card, when we get over this life addiction.

 

[GeorgeJL]

I have been holding on to my N for years now, and definitely feel like it's helped give me a sense of peace. I no longer worry if I am going to die a terrible undignified death.

 

[LifeOver]

O

Oh! That sucks. Kind of reminds me of a thread I read here about what you'd say if you got caught trying to ctb. I know it doesn't matter anymore but.... Any chance you used a good excuse?

I just told my family that I only had a mental breakdown one day and acted irrationally without thinking. They believed me. That was the only time I got caught with ctb.

 

[ihatepain]

Didn't know where to throw this, so, just went with a new thread.

Do the rest of you find comfort in having your method ready for when you're ready to CTB? Just knowing that you could do it tonight, or tomorrow. Or does it just make you more anxious, having the stuff there, and not doing it yet?

I do realize that I'm a bit drunk. But I just wanted to share this with someone. To say it out loud. Because I finally got my check, did my extensive research, and ordered everything I need. So, I'm kind of happy about that. I don't have the stuff yet, but it'll be here soon enough. And somehow I feel a sense of comfort in that. Having all the things necessary and ready, It puts me at ease a bit. So, I have two methods in mind. Full hanging and SN. I've kind of flip flopped between the idea of them. But more than likely I'll go with SN. And for some reason, that should go wrong, a full suspension hanging. I probably would of gone straight for a full hanging but after all my attemps with partial suspension, and that full hanging/short drop that turned into a suspension hanging (cotton rope plus too much slack) I rather go with SN first. So, hopefully I'll have everything soon.

Feel free to criticize my equipment. Feel free to provide any constructive criticism.

For full hanging:
12 mm static rope. Amazon. 3% elasticity. Plus, I'll use a folded towel for padding.
Diameter wise, it's thinner than my cotton rope but I'm hoping that will help to localize the pressure on my carotid arteries. 3% elasticity seems pretty static to me. Will use slipknot. And will apply soap to make sure it cinches up faster.

SN method:
SN Amazon
Food scale Amazon
Domperidone (30 x 10 mg tablets) Ebay
Ranitidine acid reducer (50 x 150 mg tablets) Amazon

I was kind of going to go crazy and get an endless ratchet and the cornhole bags for the Night Night (blood choke method). Just for shit and giggle experiment with it. But realize it was pointless, I don't want to experiment with CTB, I just want to CTB. Plus, come on, theirs no way I could fail both SN and full hanging.

I know it's kind of silly to share this but ... Just wanted to share it with someone. Big hugs people.

I will feel at peace and comforted if I have all the stuff I need to CTB. Unfortunately, nothing goes my way in my stupid life. Your plan sounds good. I want N but it seems so hard. I might just go for SN method. Idk.. Maybe I should consume SN and then hang myself immediately after consuming SN? Hmmm.. decisions decisions. I hate thinking so much.

 

[Etherealdignity333]

I haven't completely settled on a method as I'm holding out for N (unless my money runs out and I need to call it quickly), but just HAVING sodium nitrite around made the sick anxiety feeling in my stomach go away.

I will feel at peace and comforted if I have all the stuff I need to CTB. Unfortunately, nothing goes my way in my stupid life. Your plan sounds good. I want N but it seems so hard. I might just go for SN method. Idk.. Maybe I should consume SN and then hang myself immediately after consuming SN? Hmmm.. decisions decisions. I hate thinking so much.

If I have to go other routes than N, this is my plan as well. Take F or SN, partial hanging.

 

[Soul]

I discovered when I was a teenager that having a lethal dose within reach let me feel secure. I know now that a lot of what I stockpiled over the years was useless, and I now have what I really need, but either way I don't have to ctb now because I know I can ctb any time.

 

[DoneWithThis]

It's interesting to see you guys feel about having your lethal method picked out. Because I'm sure I'm not the only one here, who has some failed attempts on their record. But finding. Having. A method do one knows is going to work. Wharwfwe that method might be. It's nice to see how fit the most part relives some of that anxiety and let's one be more at peace.

Plus, feels somewhat weird to be happy about getting all necessary things to CTB.

Someone on here said that they won't be comforted until it's in their belly. And I get that. No one is going to fully at peace until their, well, fully at peace, ctb.

But like Soul said. "I don't have to ctb now because I know I can ctb any time."

 

[ihatepain]

I haven't completely settled on a method as I'm holding out for N (unless my money runs out and I need to call it quickly), but just HAVING sodium nitrite around made the sick anxiety feeling in my stomach go away.


If I have to go other routes than N, this is my plan as well. Take F or SN, partial hanging.

What is F?

 

[Etherealdignity333]

What is F?

Fentanyl.

 

[ihatepain]

Fentanyl.

I have never heard about this method before. Is this a new method??

 

[TAW122]

I have been holding on to my N for years now, and definitely feel like it's helped give me a sense of peace. I no longer worry if I am going to die a terrible undignified death.

In my case, my 12 gauge shotgun with 00 buckshot. I felt a sense a peace that death is the ultimate release from this unjust, mad world and all the bullshit that follows it. No more suffering no more pleasure, but just eternal nothingness, which was the period in which before I was born.

 

[ihatepain]

In my case, my 12 gauge shotgun with 00 buckshot. I felt a sense a peace that death is the ultimate release from this unjust, mad world and all the bullshit that follows it. No more suffering no more pleasure, but just eternal nothingness, which was the period in which before I was born.

Non-existence <3

 

[DoneWithThis]

I have never heard about this method before. Is this a new method??

From what I've read it doesn't seem new. But it does seem to be a lot of scams on the darknet with it purity wise. But theirs a whole thread about that.

 

[ihatepain]

From what I've read it doesn't seem new. But it does seem to be a lot of scams on the darknet with it purity wise. But theirs a whole thread about that.

Oh ok. Thanks.