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Backwood_tilt

UnEnlightened
Dec 27, 2019
889
Since i've been on SS, i've run upon more self-identified CFS/FM/Lyme's/ME/SEID patients than I have anywhere, outside of CFS/ME specific communities i've been apart of. I've read somewhere else that suicide is a leading cause of death among CFS or ME patients.

Are you here because of one of these illnesses, and is this illness and its effects directly related to your suicidal thoughts?
 
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Innereye

Innereye

Know thy self
Jan 18, 2020
247
Ive had CFS for years but it never bothered me as much as what I have now. Sure it limited me but it never caused any physical pain.
 
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BlueWidow

BlueWidow

Visionary
Oct 6, 2019
2,179
I was diagnosed with CFS/ME in 2009. At the time, I had been hypothyroid for a little over 13 years and they had been forcing me to take Synthroid, despite me spending years and years going from one doctor to another and begging them to switch me to a different medicine because my body doesn't process Synthroid, so I might as well have been taking a sugar pill or nothing because my thyroid was basically dying.
I finally had so much difficulty getting out of bed and functioning that I decided to go to an alternative medical clinic.
The way it was explained to me was that my untreated thyroid put extra stress on my adrenals, which then made me ill and caused me to become immuno compromised to the point where I contracted a virus or a group of viruses, which at the time is what they thought might be the cause or one of the causes of CFS. They listed a whole bunch of viruses that I tested positive for, including Epstein Barr.
I also have pain throughout my body, particularly in my knees, and I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia by one doctor. But when that doctor moved and was replaced with a new doctor, the new doctor told me that I did not have fibromyalgia. But she never gave me a new diagnosis. Instead she told me that my pain was all in my head and I was just seeking attention.
I also don't just have hypothyroidism, but actually I have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis which mean my thyroid gland is being attacked by my own body. I know this plays into all the other stuff somehow, but I'm not sure how it all fits together because no doctor has ever bothered to explain it to me. My thyroid problem has always been treated like it's easily solved with the lowest possible dose of medicine, so that even when I finally found a doctor who switched me over to a more natural thyroid drug (Armour Thyroid) after being forced to take Synthroid for about 15 years, even he kept me on the lowest possible dose of the drug to the point where my thyroid function continued to deteriorate, only more slowly.
I now treat myself over the counter with large doses of ibuprofen (2400-3000mg) for the pain in my knees and throughout my body. They keep me on the lowest possible dose of thyroid medicine (Armour Thyroid) that they can so that I barely function. I am constantly exhausted no matter how much I sleep. I have severe brain fog to the point where I sometimes can't do anything but sit in a chair because I can't think clearly enough to do anything else. I also have a constant low-grade dizziness that gets so severe several times a day that I have to lie down and I have to hold onto things in order to move around, and sometimes it gets so severe that it causes me to black out.
But, you know, there's really nothing wrong with me. It's all in my head. I apparently love doctors so much and think they're so great that I just want their attention all the time. Barf!
I've been dealing with this crap now for 25 years and I'm pretty much done at this point. I'm just ready to die and get it over with.
 
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MsMaudlin

MsMaudlin

This is the fierce last stand of all I am
Dec 8, 2019
875
Since i've been on SS, i've run upon more self-identified CFS/FM/Lyme's/ME/SEID patients than I have anywhere, outside of CFS/ME specific communities i've been apart of. I've read somewhere else that suicide is a leading cause of death among CFS or ME patients.

Are you here because of one of these illnesses, and is this illness and its effects directly related to your suicidal thoughts?
Yes, I'm here because of fibromyalgia and osteoarthritis.

I was diagnosed a bit over a year ago with osteoarthritis, then with Fibromyalgia about 6 months after that.

I think that the sudden loss of my mum and first grandchild a few months prior to that set it off in some way.

The constant pain, despite tons of painkillers is too much, and its not going to improve.
So yes, I'm here because of those shitty diseases ❤
 
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Thereisnothing

Thereisnothing

Enlightened
Jan 4, 2020
1,604
I have had ME since aged 14, am now 45. Over the years have accrued lots more horrid illnesses and really have taken their toll the last few years and last 18 months been very bad. Although it all really impacts and changed me life, its not the reason for wanting to die. Not on its own anyway. Being totally alone in the world now (since December) has made me actively suicidal, nothing to be here for now and illnesses will go on getting worse and worse, quality of life the same and scared stiff now as noone to be here for me when cant even get out of bed when ME and other things so bad. Today barely get to the bathroom, I need to go out and get repeat meds, its just me against the world personally now and its frightening me.

Regards ME being connected to suicide, I dont know, I think people do when pain gets too bad and quality of life, BUT you get that with any disease/illness when reaches a state of no return. I know alot of ME sufferers over the years and we all seem pretty determined to keep going and struggling on and finding a rainbow each day amid the rain and grey skies, but its not at all easy to live with and I can be bed bound months on end unable to hardly move at all or speak etc. I am scared stiff now am alone cos of this happens, then would just have to end my life somehow as got no family now, carers or friends to help out.
Since last month, my life ended anyway when lost last person in my life who loved and cared about me..........just going through the motions now.
 
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B

Backwood_tilt

UnEnlightened
Dec 27, 2019
889
I am scared stiff now am alone cos of this happens, then would just have to end my life somehow as got no family now, carers or friends to help out.
Since last month, my life ended anyway when lost last person in my life who loved and cared about me..........just going through the motions now.

So sorry to hear about this. I am in a similar boat, somewhat. Lost my partner to a one-sided break up in december. Now juts going through the motions, too, until I CTB (once all my materials arrive).
 
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Epsilon0

Enlightened
Dec 28, 2019
1,874
ME/CFS for more than a decade.

Hell ... pure... hell
 
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Shero

Shero

Experienced
Dec 19, 2019
274
If im in a good condition i go out maybe once a week. I live a sedetary livestyle due to POTS/vEDS. I wasn't diagnosed with CFS but im sure i have it. I sleep most of the time, and when im awake im cognitive impaired. Maybe because my blood pressure is 60/80.
CFS is diagnosed if there is not a underlying disease that could cause it, but can be comorbid am i correct?
 
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J

Jazzy

Member
Jul 16, 2020
10
I have it too and it's why I'm suicidal
 
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EmbraceOfTheVoid

EmbraceOfTheVoid

Part Time NEET - Full Time Suicidal
Mar 29, 2020
689
I have Fibro and have had chronic fatigue my entire life. It's one of my main reasons for ctb but suicide was inevitable for me even before I developed Fibromyalgia. I'd hazard a guess that a lot of these are directly caused by prolonged states of stress/trauma that result in damage to the nervous system/body.
 
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so tired or manic

so tired or manic

Arcanist
Jun 12, 2020
462
I have fibromyalgia and hashimoto's tyroiditis. I also have celiac. after eating gluten free my thyroid anitbodies were behaving better (the numbers actually have lowered from 80 to 9) all over and my physical pain decreased drastically. I hate when people say, just do this, so I never expected stopping gluten to fix so much.
 
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