illbeinthegarage

illbeinthegarage

funs fun but who needs it
Jun 14, 2020
316
i feel like im about to reach my expiration date for life. im beginning to lose any sort of appreciation i had previously for life and its as if im finally breaking down and decaying - im coming to my end. though i have a question... how do people come up with their ctb dates? is it impulsive and just when it feels right at the time? or is it planned out? i dont know what would be an appropriate date for me to leave. id like to choose a date i can stick to and find comfort in knowing its approaching but have no clue when. maybe im overthinking and its a insignificant factor in reality
 
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Worndown

Worndown

Visionary
Mar 21, 2019
2,908
I am sure it is the culmination of all these forces.
 
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Ulisses

Arcanist
Feb 21, 2020
487
neither do I feel any more appreciation for life, nor do I see any point in continuing to stay here for a long time. to create data data that is rational and not impulsive. you can remove the data from your ctb, when you are well with you, serene and sure that this is your time
I wanted to communicate better with you, but I'm not fluent in English. I'm sorry.
 
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Deleted member 17949

Deleted member 17949

Visionary
May 9, 2020
2,238
Not everyone uses a date. Personally I can't think of a date since my mood is too unstable and I am too spaced out all the time to really plan anything. I am just going to get the stuff I need and let my impulsive mess of a brain do the deciding for me.
 
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Sinai Silence

Sinai Silence

I think I'ma die alone inside my room
Jul 6, 2020
810
Most of my attempts (whilst I've had the method set out) to ctb has been pretty impulsive each time. I will either set a date and commit to it or just say f*ck it I'll do it tomorrow.

Just for me setting a date means its constantly looming in my mind, while having a rough time span to do it relieves some of the pressure.
 
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VexRal

Member
Jul 9, 2020
22
I've lost my last chances to make a comeback and will probably be getting kicked out of college soon. I've kind of come into terms with myself and am ready to let go of my attachments.

I'd want to do it hopefully by the end of this month, but I've been lacking the energy to do research or anything. I've been feeling neutral or just ok, rather than despairing recently so I feel like my SI will act strongly if I try to make an attempt. I wish ctb didn't have to be so difficult
 
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