Help Can't self harm anymore and i don't know how else to cope

[Celica45]

So basically, I live with family still, cause i can't work and I'm waiting for my disability to get approved or not, but they found out ofc that I self harm, and they have threatened me in all sorts of ways if they ever caught me again.

I know how to generally cope with stuff, but when it comes to the extreme, extreme feelings and my head keeps screaming at me and I'm panicking, self harm was the only thing that made it go away. And with me not being able to sh anymore my suicidal feeling and thoughts just keep growing stronger, I worry ill get to my breaking point soon, but I'd still like to try one or two more times to get out of this hole. I just need something to cling onto, any advice would help so much.

 

[firepunch]

When I started to work I couldn't SH either because we have to wear t-shirt with short sleeves and I needed that job to get some money. So I had to change the location of my cuts so they would never discover it. My shoulder and my chest are totally covered now. I'm always aware of when I can change my t-shirt and no one ever discovered the cuts.
Also I got some tattoos trying to scope differently but it only lasted a month and If you don't have any money it's not accessible since it's not cheap.
Also I know a lot of people SH on their thighs and it's definitely the most discreet way but I personally don't like it since I feel less.

When it comes to SH, I feel like it's the most difficult desire to repress. I hoped I could give you a better advice but none of them really worked for me. If you can see a therapist that would give you pills it would be the best but sometimes they are not accessible to everyone. I also tried other addictions, like video games and other stuff but it just postpone the desire to SH.

I hope you get better though, and even though it contradicts my advices I wish you take care of yourself. Have a great day