Help Cant ctb, being watched by mom all the time!

[tuto170]

Few months ago me and my mom moved into town from countryside, I was practicing hanging in my previous home and had a proper plan set up and this moving destroyed all my plans. Due to epidemic my mom has to stay at home and I barely can leave the flat without known reasons, trapped in town as there aren't many ways to ctb as getting SN is impossible in my country- Searched all the internet! So what is left to get prescribed amitriptyline or if I get desperate I might chunk a lot of xanax and alcohol and pass out on railways tracks