Story Can anyone relate

[ac9830]

I've been a piece of shit my whole life with all of my relationships be it friends, family, significant others. I've always been a bad person. I've been depressed the past 7 years and only once did I really contemplate CTB, now I don't see any other option. Life seemed like things were going to get better as it always does then I got smacked down again and it was of course my own doing that just caught up to me. Does anyone relate? Being super depressed but being able to make it through daily life but then you do something so horrible that it feels like you will never be able to get past it. The only option I see is ctb, I've thought about this for a while and I'm really ready, I just hope it's not worse in the afterlife.

 

[ac9830]

And what's worse of it all is that on the outside my life looks amazing. I have a great job, come from a very well off family and am able to act happy and ok most of the time. I'm just so sick of feeling this way

 

[Captive of Mind]

I could relate to this. I'm fucked up in a lot of ways but not entirely bad. I'm definitely someone people don't want to be around. It's almost like I'm too stupid to know when I'm fucking up then I realize it when it's too late. The part that makes me want to ctb more is the fact that I will continually be fucking up and be made to suffer because my mind doesn't work right. My emotions are all over the place and are too intense. My brain just isn't fit to be here at this point.

There are options for you to get better if you wanted to. If that is your only issue, it would be worth trying to fix it. Although, when someone is at this point, they have probably tried whatever they were able to. This is difficult to deal with, so I'm sending you love and support.

i can relate, i hate myself so much to the point where i cant forgive myself for everything i've done, yes humans make mistakes of course, but i'm not a human i'm a piece of shit i know i'm only 16 and i have a life ahead of me and all but i literally can't do it, teens my age learned to drive they have a large group of friends they make their parents proud, i just put my parents through hell, this is the only way, i deserve this, i wake up everyday thinking of ending it all and it just needs to happen RIGHT NOW

This site only allows people who are 18 or older. I feel for you though, that was close to the age that I had my first attempt. There might be ways for you to fix yourself. For me, I've tried enough and am ready to go. At your age, there is still so much growth and development happening that things are going to be changing for you a lot. It might be worth waiting it out for a little while if your condition isn't extreme.

 

[Neowise]

I can relate, but on a different level.

I wouldn't consider myself a "bad person", I am always nice, gentle and trying to help others whenever I can. But I have never been popular anyways, people just don't like me. I assume it's my character and humor because I don't fit in the typical female stereotypes that society determined. I'm seen as a weirdo, and on top of that I am a failure at life. Everything I do turns out shit and my familial background is also shit. I was born a loser and will forever be that loser. I don't cause bad things but bad things are attracted to me.
I feel like I fuck up everything just by existing.