Discussion Can anyone actually imagine themselves becoming old

[dec132013]

Bare with me cause this might make no sense, but even when I was a kid and not suicidal I could never picture myself existing to the next grade in school, now that i'm 19 I still can't see myself living past 25 max.

Wtf are we even supposed to do with all the time we could potentially have? Does anyone truly want to have a long life, cause it seems like even the happiest people go on about how they miss being a teenager/young adult.

 

[Wayfaerer]

At this point, no, not at all. I did think to myself "I can't imagine being 30" in my teens and it looks like I won't ever.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

Lmao nooope. Can't even see myself making it to 25.

 

[Lady black]

No not really

 

[Worthless_nobody]

Nope no way. I don't think I'll make it to 30 and I definitely don't want to grow old. Sadly longevity runs in my family...I will 100% die by suicide.

 

[Pupu]

I don't know was this question supposed to be "Did anyone even image themselves becoming old since being depressed/suicidal" or just how the title has been written. Because I think it is pretty common young people (and other too) can't really picture themselves being older than they currently are.

 

[Crazy Squirrel]

Ha ha, since I'm already "very old" (according your standards, at any rate), I've been giving this subject a lot of thought, lately. Not only do I not want to experience my body slowly breaking down over the next few decades, I really don't ever want to get shut away in some nursing home. Unspeakable horrors often happen in such places, and life has been bad enough, already. However, no matter how bad I've felt, I've never been able to override my survival instinct and go through with catching the bus. Maybe global events and climate change will finally make me able to force my hand, I don't know.

 

[nerve]

Maybe middle-aged-ish, but definitely not old. Aging seems like such a hassle on top of every other day-to-day challenge of living. Like I'm already overwhelmed with existing and I'm in really good health; it's hard to imagine sticking around once that starts to decline.

Honestly though, one of my biggest fears is not having the courage to ctb and being stuck here long past my expiration date. Getting old enough for it to matter feels like a worst case scenario kind of thing...

 

[Vault of Memories]

As soon as I became depressed I never pictured myself making it out of high school. I just turned 27 and nothing has changed...

 

[TheSoundofTime]

well... I remember when I once thought that 25 is way too long to reach and here I am - 27 lol.
Regarding old age, after seeing the life of my grandparents up until the end at age of 78 and 82, I can tell you 100% that I'm not going to get even close to that age

 

[rt1989526]

I guess I'm old, I'm 31. I do not plan on being 32.

Getting old fucking sucks, let me tell you.

 

[Superdeterminist]

I can imagine it, and it's depressing and rather terrifying to think about. So I want to die before it becomes reality.

 

[Shinkansen]

getting old is the worst nightmare of my life

 

[Soul]

I never expected to get anywhere near the age I'm currently at, so I'm afraid one can't put much faith in the predictive power of can't-imagining. But I'm familiar with the sensation.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I cannot picture it at all. I am 18 and committed to ctb, so thoughts of the future just aren't around in my head right now.

 

[TAW122]

Even in the best of all circumstances, I don't look forward to becoming old or to the age where I no longer have the faculties or physical capacity I once had when I was younger. To me, that isn't living but just existing and I'd rather die young and fulfilled than old and empty with only memories and regrets. As of now, I don't seek to live for a long time, but thinking of checking out either this year, next year, or at my earliest convenience.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I'm already old and it is a horrible feeling to get to old age.

 

[Mustkeyknow]

No

 

[alexit]

Bare with me cause this might make no sense, but even when I was a kid and not suicidal I could never picture myself existing to the next grade in school, now that i'm 19 I still can't see myself living past 25 max.

Wtf are we even supposed to do with all the time we could potentially have? Does anyone truly want to have a long life, cause it seems like even the happiest people go on about how they miss being a teenager/young adult.

No, I've always planned to die before my 40s.

 

[nomoreenergy]

I relate-- I always figured that my max would be 21 because by then I could guarantee an easier way out. I hate admitting it and I feel like I should have tried harder to recover. I really have tried to keep surviving and some part of me hopes it would make it past the day.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I don't need to imagine.

 

[stillweary]

Even if I wasn't suicidal, there is no template in my country for the type of old person that I would want to become. If I become old, it will have to be because I carved my own path. In my country, old people are not wise. There is no respect among them for younger people. There are no strong matriarch figures-- older women as a group are largely erased. There is no cultural or hereditary wisdom. There is no respect or gratitude for the lessons of life. There is no cultural acknowledgement of the very real and very natural departure of this life and the passing toward the next. All I see modeled by old people in my country is a bizarre hatred of youth and an unwillingness to value anything beyond their own selfish ambitions.

 

[Blue LIPS]

I just wanna be that gun totin' weed smokin' Grandpa. But I probably won't make it that far. I'm sure the various weird things as a kid I've smoked won't help lol catnip, newspaper, cig butts, tea leaves etc. The foil probably didn't help or the paint off of a Coke can lol.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I'm already old. Even though I chose to live out this life, I'll probably won't reach a very old age. I wrecked my body with to much shit, and take a lot of meds..

 

[BorderlineSuicidal]

Yeah, that's going to be a no from me. There's no way this flesh prison is lasting that long.

 

[nitroautnz]

Being old im fine with that, being old in with my problems? Hell no

 

[CuttlefishBeans]

Honestly, I never saw myself going past 27. Everytime I think about getting or being old it's like my mind gives a giant X and can't compute.

 

[sadworld]

That's a no from me, i would have to go through so much pain over all the years

 

[Bauhaus]

I'd rather die young and fulfilled than old and empty with only memories and regrets.

"The worst thing about getting old is that you remember how it was to be young."

 

[Tasdevil]

in my 20's I didn't want to live into my 30's then I did not want to make to my 40's but I definitely don't want to see my 43rd birthday so I have just over a year and hopefully I will be gone well before my 43rd birthday. Definitely don't want to live until I am old.