Discussion 'But I gotta, know what-what's your fantasy'

[Redt2go]

Let's do some imagining. Tell me about your dream life I want the deeeets

 

[stellabelle]

Being realistic (and only positive), my dream in life is to beat depression, make decent money, and recover from the trauma. Maybe have a little family. Maybe travel again andfall in love with life and fall in love with my old hobbies.

That's all just rose tinted lenses though. Today though my dream is to fall asleep and not wake up. My life was ruined and I was burned so badly. I am just simply done. Someone kill me already.

 

[Redt2go]

Being realistic (and only positive), my dream in life is to beat depression, make decent money, and recover from the trauma. Maybe have a little family. Maybe travel again andfall in love with life and fall in love with my old hobbies.

That's all just rose tinted lenses though. Today though my dream is to fall asleep and not wake up. My life was ruined and I was burned so badly. I am just simply done. Someone kill me already.

This sounds doable? Your dreams are quite realistic

 

[stellabelle]

This sounds doable? Your dreams are quite realistic

Yes but I've come to accept that I'll never get what I really wanted out of life, recover, or be treated decently. This isn't really my dream, but a dulled down version of it. The damage is done.

 

[Redt2go]

Yes but I've come to accept that I'll never get what I really wanted out of life, recover, or be treated decently. This isn't really my dream, but a dulled down version of it. The damage is done.

Well if it doesn't hurt too much tell me your wildest dreams just because!
Yes I've had to accept that as well. When I first started realizing it it hurt like SHIT . It was inevitable though so I'm more at peace with it

 

[stellabelle]

Well if it doesn't hurt too much tell me your wildest dreams just because!
Yes I've had to accept that as well. When I first started realizing it it hurt like SHIT . It was inevitable though so I'm more at peace with it

To be a train engineer back home and have a nice little life and apartment. Really isn't much.

 

[Redt2go]

To be a train engineer back home and have a nice little life and apartment. Really isn't much.

Awhhhhh how many kids would be in your little family?

 

[Chinaski]

Private detective, 1950s Los Angeles. I get to drink at work without having to sneak off to the bogs, get seduced by some femme fatale, talk in a snappy noirish dialogue without getting laughed at like people do these days, smoke cigs indoors, living the dream. In fact, if l had a hat, I'd do this right now.

 

[stellabelle]

Awhhhhh how many kids would be in your little family?

Maybe just one or two. Twins would be cool.

What is your dream?

 

[iHeartRockArt]

To be cured of the 2 horrible illness that hold me back in life. I don't have the perfect life, I don't have a lot of money, but I make it. I have a loving family and support system, but dread the day when they're no longer with me. But everyday I dream of being cured, so at least without them, I would be able to survive independently.

 

[iHeartRockArt]

Maybe just one or two. Twins would be cool.

What is your dream?

I always wanted twins. But sadly I cannot have children. There were twins in my ex husbands family and I always dreamed of being a mom.

 

[Redt2go]

I always wanted twins. But sadly I cannot have children. There were twins in my ex husbands family and I always dreamed of being a mom.

:( Sorry about the not having kids part and the diseases

 

[Redt2go]

Private detective, 1950s Los Angeles. I get to drink at work without having to sneak off to the bogs, get seduced by some femme fatale, talk in a snappy noirish dialogue without getting laughed at like people do these days, smoke cigs indoors, living the dream. In fact, if l had a hat, I'd do this right now.

Your life would be a movie, or a really good crime show

 

[stellabelle]

I always wanted twins. But sadly I cannot have children. There were twins in my ex husbands family and I always dreamed of being a mom.

I'm sorry you cannot have children.

Twins run in my family as well. I was always antinatalist and childfree when I was younger. My mother was so fucked up and always told me that children were the biggest mistake, don't ever have them, etc. she was also abusive. I was never given a healthy perception of marriage or family.

But now I sort of wish to share the experience with someone. I even dreamt of it the other day. Part of me feels like it's one of those things that I'm already too late for, and why bother. The other part of me says if it is to happen, it needs to be sooner rather than later. I doubt if it ever will though. Oh well.

 

[iHeartRockArt]

I'm sorry you cannot have children.

Twins run in my family as well. I was always antinatalist and childfree when I was younger. My mother was so fucked up and always told me that children were the biggest mistake, don't ever have them, etc. she was also abusive. I was never given a healthy perception of marriage or family.

But now I sort of wish to share the experience with someone. I even dreamt of it the other day. Part of me feels like it's one of those things that I'm already too late for, and why bother. The other part of me says if it is to happen, it needs to be sooner rather than later. I doubt if it ever will though. Oh well.

I'm sorry you had such a bad experience being brought up. That's never ok, never something a child should go through. If you are able to still have children and are stable enough to raise them with someone you love. I would absolutely go for your dream. But I also understand the hesitation. Everyone deserves happiness.

 

[VoloFataliDoce]

I'd love to have a relatively 'normal' life. To be free from mental illness, able to hold a steady job, able to have a family; maybe have a little money in the bank. Of course, that isn't very exciting but it is what it is.

 

[loser41]

i just want to be loved and live modestly. something so simple but at the same time so far out of reach for me.

 

[waived]

I'd like a small to medium sized house out in rural farmland but not isolated, and in a geographic location that has seasons and a mixed landscape of forests and fields. The aesthetics in mind exist between Georgia and New England but are fairly exclusive to regions located within that range.

It would be a location with summers where the air is thick with honeysuckle and cicadas and the foliage has an impenetrable roundness. An early autumn, where the day has warmth and a slow golden light that hangs over the fields and tall grasses with crickets, cool air, and a particular stillness, but the night is loud with the remnants of summer insects. Next would be the bright blue skies, cornfields and pumpkins and then wet greens and browns with puddles still holding the colors of the fall. Winter on rural farmland is a special kind of desolation. When the sky is grey and the sun is low and miles of frozen earth is visible with the occasional sound of distant geese, each of those last thirty minutes before night is home. There will be a spring thaw and bloom of song birds that swirls in chaos with the last of the winter storms leading to running brooks and the smell of wet earth and plant decay that sticks to your clothes.

The house would have a porch with a hammock and a big white oak in the front of the property. In the same way that a lot of people have a greenhouse I would have a small to medium sized atrium library attached to the house that would be one very large room elevated off the ground. It would have high ceilings with as much skylight and as many walls a continuous stretch of window as possible. In this room there would be several computers and a wall of displays for research. Since this is a semi realistic fantasy all electronic data will be accessible through a hologram, accessible at any place in the room, that can be moved around and controlled with hand movements. There would be book shelves arranged in a central location for the length of the room and there could be the most comfortable chairs and couches of all types everywhere including wheeled computer chairs and hardwood floors to zip around on.

There would initially be two fields near the house. There will be a poppy field closest, and a cornfield perhaps 1/8th of a mile away because having cornfields close to your home is scary. The surrounding land will be mostly open fields with treelines and maybe a small wooded area or two visible but maybe a mile away.

 

[LastDay]

Nice Ludacris reference lmao. You should share yours too!

For the relationship between me and my boyfriend of nine years to go back to the way it was when we first started dating.
Finally be at a normal weight without loose skin.
To love myself and not have mental illnesses.
To become close friends with a therapist I used to see, also with the most recent therapist.
To make a substantial amount of money at a job where I help others and it makes me happy and fulfilled to work at.
To be cherished and loved by everyone in my life.
Ultimately to be happy I guess, and the people in my life to be happy too.

Also it would be cool to have the power to heal mental and physical illnesses but that's some supernatural shit and I can't reach the other stuff already lol.

 

[ArtsyDrawer]

Fifty billion dollars, a fifteen room house and a Japanese miss universe wife.

Ok, let's be serious now.
Epilepsy. Getting rid of it, specifically. For the past fourteen-ish years it has been, and still is my source of pain. It's my reason for ctb.
To solve a problem you need to go to its root and yank that shit out. Epilepsy is the root of all of my problems.
Once that's done, I could go ahead and try to relearn how to sociolize and whatnot. Maybe get a better job, a decent place to live, get the hell away from Israel... But all those things are hindered by the root of all my problems - epilepsy.

edit: what the hell. I wrote this on my phone and my typos were fixed! Suddenly they're not fixed again!

 

[Heart Shards]

My dream is to be a renowned author. It won't happen though, depression won't let me. The self-doubt it carries is too much. Self-doubt is what is eating me alive, It prevents me from living TBH.

 

[lost illusions]

Feel warm, both physically and spiritually

No more being the plague of society

 

[DownInaHole]

I'm living it.
It's all so new to me.
You'll be saying "amazing" and "wow" a lot.
It's absolutely worth all efforts.

 

[anelakapu]

My dream life is being likeable, heard, secure and cute.

 

[SeekingSolace]

Fifty billion dollars, a fifteen room house and a Japanese miss universe wife.

Ok, let's be serious now.
Epilepsy. Getting rid of it, specifically. For the past fourteen-ish years it has been, and still is my source of pain. It's my reason for ctb.
To solve a problem you need to go to its root and yank that shit out. Epilepsy is the root of all of my problems.
Once that's done, I could go ahead and try to relearn how to sociolize and whatnot. Maybe get a better job, a decent place to live, get the hell away from Israel... But all those things are hindered by the root of all my problems - epilepsy.

edit: what the hell. I wrote this on my phone and my typos were fixed! Suddenly they're not fixed again!

I'm with you...if I could get rid of my epilepsy then I think I could learn to cope with my mental illness; the seizures make the anxiety and depression far more severe however.

I'm tired of waking up with a chewed up tongue and bruises I have no memory of acquiring. I wish I could get approval for disability. I'm on my fourth try now. At least then I could experience some level of independence...I feel like such a burden to my close friends that help take care of me.

 

[Burbank]

I'd graduate high school and move to a city. Would live in an apartment, preferably alone, and study to become a stylist. Maybe if that didn't work out, i'd study anthropology at university. Traveling the world and seeing places i've always wanted to visit, could open my eyes a little more though, so maybe that before studying? I'd definitely go back to Greece and would love to visit Iceland, Japan and South Africa. Once i settled down and had a family, i'd move back to the countryside.

About mental health, i know nothing will ever go away 100%, but i wish it was just a little more bearable. Success doesn't take mental illness away, so i just have to work on it somehow.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

I would rid my self of chronic pain, and find a job that I actually like doing. I also want to travel like I used to before I got sick.

 

[CuriousAboutThis]

Get my act together so I can get engaged, married, and have kids and get old. With a girl named Ashley kind of worried that within my own guilt and shame and virtues and sins of the past I keep deleting her number out of guilt and shame of the past.

 

[favourite]

I'm really good at something. Maybe writing or acting. I get to work with famous people and I'm well liked among them. My body isn't stinking tube of lard, I'm adored by many and truly loved by one.
Thinking realistically, the last thing is the least possible.

 

[Othermind]

Go back in time.
I'd do a lot of things.
Like practice more and make the shitty band I played in not so shitty, not do the horrible things that ruined my life with remorse ecc.
I also fantasize about Jane (Doe) returning my feelings, or maybe even have a healthy youth with a steady group of friends and normal first experiences with love and romance leading to a balanced and productive adult life. The sky's the limit!
I don't know, this is what I fall asleep to before the benzos knock me out...