Bucket lists?

[Dog Food]

Does anyone here have things they want to do before they CTB? Places they want to go, people they want to meet? Or have you lost all interest in everything and just want death to come as quickly as possible?

For me, I would like to:
-graduate from college (I should have graduated last year, but I ended up in the mental ward for 2 months)
-be able to eat a meal without vomiting or feeling guilty
-have a genuine, open discussion with someone, maybe even making a friend
-lose my virginity (it's supposed to be easier for women, but because of anorexia, I look like an edgy 12 year old, and because of social anxiety, I can't talk to anyone)
-learn guitar
-visit France, where a bunch of family I've never met resides

And of course, there's the logistical stuff like making a perfect note, finding the perfect place, acquiring N from A, etc.

I'm interested in hearing what other people have to say. I wish you all luck in whatever you want to do.

 

[couldntthinkofaname]

ive lost all my dreams but its good you have bucket list, an aim, sth to look forward too.

i think that are some reasonable and nice goals too. godspeed with that.

i envy you

 

[Midnight]

If that list would have to consist of things that are actually possible (financially and otherwise) then no i don't have one. Hope's and dreams have long gone ... All there is left is to "kick the bucket"

 

[Duqu]

I would love to parachute out of a plane (attached to someone who actually pulls the chute, not jumping myself) with another person who records/takes pictures next to me. Finances are what really stop me, plus I'm unsure if they have body weight requirements (also have an eating disorder but my metabolism is so effed up that I'm over 200 lbs at 5'9 yet I eat 0-400 calories a day...I hate my body). I used to be terrified of heights but I bought a groupon a few years back for a helicopter lesson and it was a gorgeous day and the instructor actually REMOVED THE DOORS of the helicopter (just a little 2 seater) and I got to fly it! My fear of heights vanished that day. I still want to jump though.

Also I'd love to travel...again, expense, plus I get tired easily and it's hard to travel in a wheelchair when most places aren't too wheelchair friendly.

 

[agreement]

I've never grasped the bucket list thing: if I would have still things more important than die today, then I wouldn't feel like wanting to die and I wouldn't be suicidal.

I'd like to go again to Japan?
Yes!

It's doable in my current situation?
Barely, mostly not.

I'd like better to kill myself instantly and painlessly then go to Japan?
Hell yeah!

 

[anna]

I wanted to visit the Highgate Cemetery
But I do not care anymore

 

[Tiburcio]

Trust me, if I could fulfill my bucket list I wouldn't want to kill myself anylonger.

 

[QueenEtna]

My bucket list :

-Become a professional artist
-Find love

that's all I want in life

 

[couldntthinkofaname]

@FullFat

what is holding you back with cocaine?

 

[FullFat]

@FullFat

what is holding you back with cocaine?

Access

 

[couldntthinkofaname]

Access

dont you live in a big city?

you could use the darknet

if you live in europe yoi could pm me your adress and id send you some

no srsly should be no problem for you to order via darknet

 

[Duqu]

Look up Netheravon airfield near Salisbury. One of the most popular clubs there sharing space with army training. I did 2 static line jumps where you get out the plane at 2500ft on your own but the chute opens by itself as a long ripcord is tied to the pilots seat.
Tandem jumps are more common, stapped to an instructor, you do nothing but fall and prepare to land. Usually 10,000 to 12,000ft.
I think there is a weight limit of 16 stone, check that.

That's cool..I'm in the US though and if I can't afford to jump I definitely can't afford to fly to Europe lol.

 

[FullFat]

dont you live in a big city?

you could use the darknet

if you live in europe yoi could pm me your adress and id send you some

no srsly should be no problem for you to order via darknet

FL suburb actually. I was just saying in that thread that rural would be too remote for me. Thanks for the offer though! I know some people who know some people who know some people in my town who could hook me up. I should try harder. I just don't want it getting back to my family. My brother knows practically everyone and definitely some of the coke heads. As for darknet, I've never ordered anything on there before. Any tips?

 

[StarDust]

Honestly, my bucket list is complete, there is nothing left for me to see at this point...I guess the one last this is I will go to my fav beach and have a lovely couple of days...hey, if I am gonna CTB I might as well do it looking sexy and tan.... *shrugs*

 

[couldntthinkofaname]

@FullFat

fl = florida?

 

[FullFat]

@FullFat

fl = florida?

Yep, sorry

 

[couldntthinkofaname]

Yep, sorry

people who live in florida can be depressed?

i was in fort myers once and it was sooo beautiful

 

[Slacker]

also have an eating disorder but my metabolism is so effed up that I'm over 200 lbs at 5'9 yet I eat 0-400 calories a day...I hate my body)

How can someone survive eating less then 500kcal per day??? Normally this leads to more muscle depletion than to fett loss. Is this possible because u are in a wheelchair?

 

[strained03]

How can someone survive eating less then 500kcal per day??? Normally this leads to more muscle depletion than to fett loss. Is this possible because u are in a wheelchair?

It is possible. Check MyProAna forums.

 

[FullFat]

people who live in florida can be depressed?

i was in fort myers once and it was sooo beautiful

I actually hate a lot of what makes Florida Florida including the heat, the beach, Disney World, roller coasters, I-4 the road to hell, etc. I haven't been over to Fort Myers. I live in central FL and never really ventured further south. You have family there, or was it just vacation?

 

[Duqu]

How can someone survive eating less then 500kcal per day??? Normally this leads to more muscle depletion than to fett loss. Is this possible because u are in a wheelchair?

Easily. I don't do a lot of exercising (can't; my joints are to effed up), and like I said my metabolism is shot so if I eat more than that I gain weight...

 

[couldntthinkofaname]

I actually hate a lot of what makes Florida Florida including the heat, the beach, Disney World, roller coasters, I-4 the road to hell, etc. I haven't been over to Fort Myers. I live in central FL and never really ventured further south. You have family there, or was it just vacation?

vacation

im.from europe