Hi
I opened a thread couple fo days ago about SN purity. my SN is arrived, but i have a lot of doubts.
I have no doubts i need to ctb. i spent the last 6 years alone (chronic depression diagnosed, i never toke any antidepressant because i hate that stuff), my only contacts at work; 3 months ago i knew a girl. she came to my home. we made love, we stayed hugged in bed for entire nights. she told me "i will take care of you no matter what". so i thought, fucking stupid idea, to told to her to chose me (she was seeing other guys during that period, she finished a long 4 years story with her ex). i snet to her a message, just a long "chose me", opening my hearth to her, telling to her everything. i was very confident about, i was happy you can say; 6 years living alone, in a fucking empty house, everynight fighting against sleep and darkness. i hoped to see her that night. that she would send me "i want you". she chose to spend the holidays with another man. i'm always the second choice, always. always the one that is good, but not too much.
i had a severe nervous breackdown during the holidays (she don't know). very heavy, very scary. my psychiatrist proposed a brief recover in a psych structure but i don't want to go. i want to stay with her, every fucking night. i need to die.
SN is starting to make me paranoid, i hate vomiting and i'm not sure about it.
I read also about the Nitrogen method, and it seems such a sweet relief. but i live in europe and most of the guides talk about Nitrogen cylinders and Valves in US or Australia.
I know there is a guide in the site but please, can anyone help me pointing a good site for order Nitrogen Cylinders in Europe, and which Valve need to be used? i'm such and idiot and i don't understand pressure and stuff like that.
Many thanks to all
I opened a thread couple fo days ago about SN purity. my SN is arrived, but i have a lot of doubts.
I have no doubts i need to ctb. i spent the last 6 years alone (chronic depression diagnosed, i never toke any antidepressant because i hate that stuff), my only contacts at work; 3 months ago i knew a girl. she came to my home. we made love, we stayed hugged in bed for entire nights. she told me "i will take care of you no matter what". so i thought, fucking stupid idea, to told to her to chose me (she was seeing other guys during that period, she finished a long 4 years story with her ex). i snet to her a message, just a long "chose me", opening my hearth to her, telling to her everything. i was very confident about, i was happy you can say; 6 years living alone, in a fucking empty house, everynight fighting against sleep and darkness. i hoped to see her that night. that she would send me "i want you". she chose to spend the holidays with another man. i'm always the second choice, always. always the one that is good, but not too much.
i had a severe nervous breackdown during the holidays (she don't know). very heavy, very scary. my psychiatrist proposed a brief recover in a psych structure but i don't want to go. i want to stay with her, every fucking night. i need to die.
SN is starting to make me paranoid, i hate vomiting and i'm not sure about it.
I read also about the Nitrogen method, and it seems such a sweet relief. but i live in europe and most of the guides talk about Nitrogen cylinders and Valves in US or Australia.
I know there is a guide in the site but please, can anyone help me pointing a good site for order Nitrogen Cylinders in Europe, and which Valve need to be used? i'm such and idiot and i don't understand pressure and stuff like that.
Many thanks to all
