bipolar22
Notorious shtposter
- Aug 31, 2022
- 337
Having booze cravings. Alot. I jse benzodiazepine but they just dont make me happy and give me a break from this painful existence enough. Sadly since I puked blood im scared off the booze for life. Its very hard. Anyone the bullshit take a cold shower bulllshit they tell me but thsts nonsense. Wonder if it will ever go away. Been 3 years now. Non boozelife is boring. Its the boredom. Snd my life is just raw pain. Alao kindled to shit. I got on a 2 day xanax zone out inhave to taper for 3 days. It really is acurse. Und unfair. Only drank on and off for few years before this stomsch gsve out. Running out of coping. Im moody im bitter. I do my exercises but my life is dtill to shit I wanna go on s weekend bender snd just be on s cloud of euphoria just for a while. But I will never in thid life heve it again. Cause I csnt ill puke blood. Its like this evil nature dsw me loopholes the suffering snd put a lock on it. Real is a real witch for real