houseofleaves
and this with thee remains.
- Jan 14, 2022
- 549
I noticed that there is no such thread, so i decided to make one… This is not about documentary books or resources (!), it's for fiction books that are, well, kinda suited for suicidal ideation (in my/your opinion). If anyone has any books that suit this thread, please, share them 
i'm really interested…
So. I'll start with Vladimir Nabokov. «Pale Fire». It's a novel that consists a poem.
In second part of the poem John Shade talks about his daughter Hazel's suicide. She has always been not normie-like; she was ugly, had no friends and, of course, no boyfriend; her acquaintances send her on a blind date, and the guy leaved immediately after seeing her. Hazel died that evening on her way home.
genius.com
i'm really interested… So. I'll start with Vladimir Nabokov. «Pale Fire». It's a novel that consists a poem.
This novel, as i said, consists of a 999-line poem AND a commentary to it. The poem is written by poet named John Shade; from what i could gather, Shade is killed right after finishing his piece — and then his insane friend named Charles Kinbote gains access to the poem and writes an excessive commentary to it. I could speak about this book for ages, but if you're interested, you better google and read it yourself; unfortunately, i'm really bad at explaining things.
In second part of the poem John Shade talks about his daughter Hazel's suicide. She has always been not normie-like; she was ugly, had no friends and, of course, no boyfriend; her acquaintances send her on a blind date, and the guy leaved immediately after seeing her. Hazel died that evening on her way home.
At first we'd smile and say:
«All little girls are plump» or «Jim McVey
(The family oculist) will cure that slight
Squint in no time» And later: «She'll be quite
Pretty, you know»; and trying to assuage
The swelling torment: «That's the awkward age»
«She should take riding lessons,» you would say
(Your eyes and mine not meeting). «She should play
Tennis, or badminton. Less starch, more fruit!
She may not be a beauty, but she's cute»
It was no use, no use. The prizes won
In French and history, no doubt, were fun;
At Christmas parties games were rough, no doubt,
And one shy little guest might be left out;
But let's be fair: while children of her age
Were cast as elves and fairies on the stage
That she'd helped paint for the school pantomime,
My gentle girl appeared as Mother Time,
A bent charwoman with a slop pail and broom…
«All little girls are plump» or «Jim McVey
(The family oculist) will cure that slight
Squint in no time» And later: «She'll be quite
Pretty, you know»; and trying to assuage
The swelling torment: «That's the awkward age»
«She should take riding lessons,» you would say
(Your eyes and mine not meeting). «She should play
Tennis, or badminton. Less starch, more fruit!
She may not be a beauty, but she's cute»
It was no use, no use. The prizes won
In French and history, no doubt, were fun;
At Christmas parties games were rough, no doubt,
And one shy little guest might be left out;
But let's be fair: while children of her age
Were cast as elves and fairies on the stage
That she'd helped paint for the school pantomime,
My gentle girl appeared as Mother Time,
A bent charwoman with a slop pail and broom…
John Francis Shade (Ft. Vladimir Nabokov) – Pale Fire: A Poem in Four Cantos
Vladimir Nabokov assumes two personas in order to write Pale Fire – a novel comprising a foreword to Pale Fire: A Poem in Four Cantos, the poem itself, an extensive commentary on
genius.com
. Through his final, er, months (years?) before leaving he has some sort of episodes, where he is saying… see spoiler. 
