Benzos

[letsmakeitagoodworl]

I feel irrationally angry.

I want to use my benzos and z drugs to die but have been told they wont work. I have tonnes and tonnes of them, not sure but prob like 150 zop, maybe 20 zolpidem, maybe 150-200 clonaz. I would use morphine but how tf people get a hold of that is beyond me. It was my bday today & some of the pep I've been there for most didnt even recognize it. I dont like my bday but it was the first of the last 4 I spent out of a mh unit, but instead I spent it sleeping the entire day really depressed & exhausted from months of lack of sleep so it was even worse then being in a mh unit. I generally don't think I xan go on but I'm equally scared of dying. How can you go on when you can never sleep & you can't stop the stuff making you want to die. I havnt felt as low as I do tonight in so long. I have fox glove but it's taking forever to put into 100 capsules so that not currently possible. I just want my sleep meds to work

 

[Shadowlord900]

The longer you take the same type of sleeping medication, the more tolerance your body builds up to it making it less effective. Regardless of whether you can find other sleeping meds you haven't tried yet, I'm unsure if taking a break from your current sleeping meds will help reduce your body's tolerance, it might depend on how long you've been taking them.

I'm also not sure how effective benzos are with CTBing, but if you've also been taking those for long time, your body will have built up a tolerance for them, that might make it more difficult for you to CTB on them.

If sleeping is your biggest worry, have you considered trying a Sleep Clinic if possible?

 

[letsmakeitagoodworl]

The longer you take the same type of sleeping medication, the more tolerance your body builds up to it making it less effective. Regardless of whether you can find other sleeping meds you haven't tried yet, I'm unsure if taking a break from your current sleeping meds will help reduce your body's tolerance, it might depend on how long you've been taking them.

I'm also not sure how effective benzos are with CTBing, but if you've also been taking those for long time, your body will have built up a tolerance for them, that might make it more difficult for you to CTB on them.

If sleeping is your biggest worry, have you considered trying a Sleep Clinic if possible?

Thanks, yea I have built up a tolerance but I take normalish doses of like 1.5 zop pills and the likes so a few hundred would still be loads more then ever. I have delayed sleep phase disorder which is permanent and mines quite severe so there's no cure but I manage it usually okay, I just have other mh issues going on that impact everything alot. I have been fighting so long (like 20 years) and I'm done

 

[jodes2]

I feel irrationally angry.

I want to use my benzos and z drugs to die but have been told they wont work. I have tonnes and tonnes of them, not sure but prob like 150 zop, maybe 20 zolpidem, maybe 150-200 clonaz. I would use morphine but how tf people get a hold of that is beyond me. It was my bday today & some of the pep I've been there for most didnt even recognize it. I dont like my bday but it was the first of the last 4 I spent out of a mh unit, but instead I spent it sleeping the entire day really depressed & exhausted from months of lack of sleep so it was even worse then being in a mh unit. I generally don't think I xan go on but I'm equally scared of dying. How can you go on when you can never sleep & you can't stop the stuff making you want to die. I havnt felt as low as I do tonight in so long. I have fox glove but it's taking forever to put into 100 capsules so that not currently possible. I just want my sleep meds to work

You can get morphine on the dn vaguely easily. In the UK it only comes in 10mg slow release tablets so you need to crush 1000 of them according to the ppeh, plus benzos and 2 other drugs you can get from online pharmacies

 

[Smart No More]

Have you tried L theanine to help with your sleep issues? It's apparently very helpful with rebalancing the gaba receptors, speaking in basic terms. Gaba plays a part in sleep and benzos are gabaergic. The trouble with benzos is that they help you sleep but the phases of sleep are hindered by it so it's never the complete sleep your body and more importantly, your mind, needs. Even if you sleep 24hrs on them it's just not real sleep. I've experienced severe sleep issues so I know how you feel with that. Having mh issues on top will only be increased by it. It must be such a drain on you and your quality of life. Doctors can be so unsympathetic too. I feel for you. L-theanine isn't a magic cure but I really think it could help you. It's legal so you can buy it online. Melatonin is another option to aid sleep but I'm assuming you are well aware of that one already and tbh I think it has less potential than L-theanine but together they could have better impact.

I hope you find a way to a better situation.

 

[Shadowlord900]

Have you tried L theanine to help with your sleep issues? It's apparently very helpful with rebalancing the gaba receptors, speaking in basic terms. Gaba plays a part in sleep and benzos are gabaergic. The trouble with benzos is that they help you sleep but the phases of sleep are hindered by it so it's never the complete sleep your body and more importantly, your mind, needs. Even if you sleep 24hrs on them it's just not real sleep. I've experienced severe sleep issues so I know how you feel with that. Having mh issues on top will only be increased by it. It must be such a drain on you and your quality of life. Doctors can be so unsympathetic too. I feel for you. L-theanine isn't a magic cure but I really think it could help you. It's legal so you can buy it online. Melatonin is another option to aid sleep but I'm assuming you are well aware of that one already and tbh I think it has less potential than L-theanine but together they could have better impact.

I hope you find a way to a better situation.

Out of curiosity, do you know if there are prescription versions of L-theanine that are stronger than the over the counter versions? I've been looking into getting prescription versions of Melatonin online. You mentioning L-theanine and it having more potential than Melatonin has piqued my interest.

 

[well2hell]

The longer you take the same type of sleeping medication, the more tolerance your body builds up to it making it less effective. Regardless of whether you can find other sleeping meds you haven't tried yet, I'm unsure if taking a break from your current sleeping meds will help reduce your body's tolerance, it might depend on how long you've been taking them.

I'm also not sure how effective benzos are with CTBing, but if you've also been taking those for long time, your body will have built up a tolerance for them, that might make it more difficult for you to CTB on them.

If sleeping is your biggest worry, have you considered trying a Sleep Clinic if possible?

Sleep clinics are mostly useless. They prescribe CBT for insomnia (which is ludicrous from the point of view of the quality of the scientific evidence that supposedly backs it up) and otherwise melatonin or low-dose antidepressants like Silenor (doxepin 6mg; FDA-approved for insomnia), amitriptyline (10-20mg) or mirtazapine (3.75-7.5mg). Low-dose antidepressants are recommended over benzodiazepines for sleep and could well help OP, but his GP should be able to prescribe one; no need for a referral to a sleep clinic.

OP: benzodiazepines are very forgiving in terms of overdose - they have a wide therapeutic margin. They won't be lethal by themselves. The lethal mixture DDMAPh designed for medical aid in dying does include a benzodiazepine (diazepam 1g), but its main effect is to put the patient to sleep quickly and to potentiate the effects of morphine (15g).

 

[letsmakeitagoodworl]

Sorry pep I will reply better tomorrow, I took out a litre of blood before and now lack much ability to reply propey.ir seemed the best thing I could do tonight to bear to keep going since I'm stuck living because I'm to pathetic to end it

 

[Smart No More]

Out of curiosity, do you know if there are prescription versions of L-theanine that are stronger than the over the counter versions? I've been looking into getting prescription versions of Melatonin online. You mentioning L-theanine and it having more potential than Melatonin has piqued my interest.

I don't think so but you can find it all over the web. Maybe there's a stronger version there. I'm not sure how much a stronger dose would work. You could ask a doctor. I may be wrong.

 

[Kattt]

I hope you won't mind me posting this here
I really wanted it to be tucked out of the way.
It's not exactly a source , but I will explain.
Some years ago ,.my friend and I travelled across Eastern Europe and met with a number of government approved pharmacist's. We explained that we were looking for long term relationships with professionals who could supply us with medicines, primarily benzodiazepines, for which we would pay cash. The arrangement would be unique and any others would go through us.
I will not go into further details regarding our methods. We sat and ate with them and their families which is how I personally consolidate an agreement.
There are some medicines that can't be acquired, which must be respected.

It is within the UK only.

Please respect this site and ask for a meeting elsewhere.
I appreciate that prices may have elevated a little, however, I have decided to extend this service to you
i am NOT A SOURCE, nor will I ever be one. I personally, handle no medicines or money at any time.
This is for information only.
Please respect the site.

 

[letsmakeitagoodworl]

I hope you won't mind me posting this here
I really wanted it to be tucked out of the way.
It's not exactly a source , but I will explain.
Some years ago ,.my friend and I travelled across Eastern Europe and met with a number of government approved pharmacist's. We explained that we were looking for long term relationships with professionals who could supply us with medicines, primarily benzodiazepines, for which we would pay cash. The arrangement would be unique and any others would go through us.
I will not go into further details regarding our methods. We sat and ate with them and their families which is how I personally consolidate an agreement.
There are some medicines that can't be acquired, which must be respected.

It is within the UK only.

Please respect this site and ask for a meeting elsewhere.
I appreciate that prices may have elevated a little, however, I have decided to extend this service to you
i am NOT A SOURCE, nor will I ever be one. I personally, handle no medicines or money at any time.
This is for information only.
Please respect the site.

Hiya thankyou for your message, I'm a little confused and am not sure if I should message you, I'm in New Zealand unfortunately though

 

[Kattt]

No pint messaging me, I'm afraid. But that is how it is done

 

[hopelessgirl]

Look up SN in the forum.. that's my method.

 

[letsmakeitagoodworl]

Look up SN in the forum.. that's my method.

Thanks heaps, it seems the most popular, for some reason it scares me, probs only because ik sleep meds and morphine would be pleasant & sleep meds I've taken for a long time so the idea of using them scars me less then foreign things. But I'm more scared it wouldn't work