Benzo Withdrawal

[Kornyboyo]

Hi everyone,

I am a new member here. I came off clonazepam 8 months ago and have been in a living hell ever since. After many Cold Turkeys and being kindled over the years it has severely damaged by brain.

Deep down I don't want to end my life but the mental torture I experience every second is beyond torture.

Im here to learn if anyone else is in a similar situation with being messed up from psychiatric medication.

I have had generalized anxiety for years but since coming of clonazepam I live in a state of constant terror of my own thoughts. Even non intrusive thoughts. I've developed extreme hyperawareness of thinking OCD and it feels like nothing exists outside of my dark intrusive looping thoughts.

 

[Sailfisher]

What dosage were they giving you, and for how long?

 

[a_strange_day]

clonazepam is a real bitch, so powerful and destructive. when you did your withdrawal did you doc prescribe a long acting benzo to alievate symptoms ?
withdrawal of benzodiazepines is a long and complicated process, depends on how long you have been taking it, dosage etc, it takes time, even more when you are using a short acting one

I've done it many times over the last 20 years, and yes it takes a toll

 

[Kornyboyo]

I have only been a short term user of 6 months of less each time. I have come off before about 4 times over the past 5 years. This time my brain flipped a switch and I tapered in 45 days.

 

[CelestialSky]

I get withdrawal symptoms from even a very low dose of benzos (diazepam), it really sucks. I believe diazepam is a longer acting benzo, so some doctors recommend using them when withdrawing from shorter acting ones, as it helps the symptoms to be less intense. Personally, I just don't have it in me to stop taking them, especially as I plan on ctb soon, I don't see the point. But I feel your pain, especially with the OCD stuff, and am really sorry you're going through a rough time.

 

[a_strange_day]

maybe you weren't ready for that or not in the right mood. every time I decided to stop benzos for a while I made sure I was completely busy all day long and didn't have time to think, summer for example, sports, work etc...
anyway you shouldn't stay like that, if you are suffering so much you should reconsider, there is nothing wrong with stepping back a little

 

[Sailfisher]

Another question. How long did an individual dose have an effect on you?

 

[Kornyboyo]

maybe you weren't ready for that or not in the right mood. every time I decided to stop benzos for a while I made sure I was completely busy all day long and didn't have time to think, summer for example, sports, work etc...
anyway you shouldn't stay like that, if you are suffering so much you should reconsider, there is nothing wrong with stepping back a little

When in protracted withdrawal you can't go back on. They stop working or become paradoxical. If I could go back on and do a slow taper I would. But being 8 months out and reinstating is playing with fire. They turned on me quickly this time.