Venting Before I had doubts now I have it clear

[Isisnefert]

For a year I have had suicidal thoughts, in March 2020 I was very close, but I asked my doctor for help, who almost cut me off (hospital admission) months later I thought I had recovered. but it was only an illusion, a short time later I was suicidal again but without making the decision completely. Now yes, I have it clear, I want ctb, the problem that I have no means, I have been close to ordering SN, I do not have much information about whether it is legal or not, in my country. I think they only manage companies, I found it online. I am afraid to order it and that the police intervene and they section me. I only have one method left, jump, I have access to the 11th floor of a building and a bridge of approximately 30 meters.But first I have to sign the last will documents at a notary's office. if I could get SN I would feel much calmer, my heart is at 1000, I can't handle panic attacks and anxiety, the doctors didn't help me at all. sorry for my bad English one more time.

 

[WornOutLife]

It seems we're undoubtedly in the same boat.
Getting SN would be fantastic but damn, it's so hard depending on the country.

Your English is okay!

Anyway, I hope things get better for us somehow and if not, I hope peace arrives somehow!

 

[LooksAtMoonDog]

Sorry to hear you are going through this struggle, I hope you find the peace you need.

 

[fred farkle]

i guess you have to take a chance and order sn. are you in europe? i hear poland sells it?

 

[Isisnefert]

Supongo que tienes que arriesgarte y pedir sn. ¿estás en europa? Escuché que Polonia lo vende?

Thanks I will investigate

Parece que, sin duda, estamos en el mismo barco.
Obtener SN sería fantástico, pero maldita sea, es muy difícil dependiendo del país.

¡Tu inglés está bien!

De todos modos, espero que las cosas mejoren para nosotros de alguna manera y si no, ¡espero que la paz llegue de alguna manera!

Yes, we Are in the same boat, really, in 2008 i wanted to ctb, i recovered in 2011, fell again in 2015, and this Time is the Strongest