Venting Back after over 3½ months thought people cared more about me

[TheGoodGuy]

Haven´t been online in 3½ month and when I just logged in and saw only 1 message asking how I was doing and 11 notifications just goes to show I could disappear and no on would give a fuck..

Hear I wasn´t expecting dozens of messages but 1 only 1 who asked where I was and how I was doing? I thought I had made a great impact on the forum and the people on it like knowing certain people and making the popular suicide meme thread but I guess in the end nobody truly cares, just venting out of disappointment of how little people cares about me.

 

[Wayfaerer]

It it's any consolation, If I had done the same I would've been shocked by getting that one message.

 

[Final Escape]

Haven´t been online in 3½ month and when I just logged in and saw only 1 message asking how I was doing and 11 notifications just goes to show I could disappear and no on would give a fuck..

Hear I wasn´t expecting dozens of messages but 1 only 1 who asked where I was and how I was doing? I thought I had made a great impact on the forum and the people on it like knowing certain people and making the popular suicide meme thread but I guess in the end nobody truly cares, just venting out of disappointment of how little people cares about me.

It's just because this isn't real life. I mean u meet real people but it's never the same unless u have a community where u are making contact with people in real life. I wouldn't take it personal. When I'm gone off this site it will be like I was never here lol! Unless someone accidentally bumps on my posts and reads them.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Haven´t been online in 3½ month and when I just logged in and saw only 1 message asking how I was doing and 11 notifications just goes to show I could disappear and no on would give a fuck..

Hear I wasn´t expecting dozens of messages but 1 only 1 who asked where I was and how I was doing? I thought I had made a great impact on the forum and the people on it like knowing certain people and making the popular suicide meme thread but I guess in the end nobody truly cares, just venting out of disappointment of how little people cares about me.

Bruh I was legit wondering where you were. I felt like I didn't know you well enough to pry into your business though.

 

[XYZ]

I get your disappointment, it always cuts to feel others don't care.

Would you feel a little better if I pointed out that there are 15,000 members on this forum? Not 150, nor 1,500 but 15 - freaking - thousand. That's a whole lot of members!

Or would if make you feel a little less disappointed if I said that every few months there seems to be a reshuffling of the board and old users leave and new ones come? Maybe your friends are not as active anymore.

Anyway that suicide meme thread cracks me up, so that's a great legacy

Welcome back!

It it's any consolation, If I had done the same I would've been shocked by getting that one message.

I would not pm you, but I'd wonder where you were, as I always read your posts with great interest.

 

[checkouttime]

Hey, I'm not saying is right. but the sites just been updated and you have not got notifications etc because of this. I signed in yesterday and had 105, but i had already read most of them from the previous day ( alot from games). Apparently if you don't comment in a thread you don't get notifications after a while, and also alot of people have complained about the notifications thing etc being iffy for a while(i made a thread yesterday about it)

So don't take that as your not popular or liked. definately wouldn't gauge it from that reason.

 

[Good4Nothing]

I remember you. I figured you caught your bus.

 

[Mr2005]

I know how it feels. Did you announce it or slip away quietly? If and when I leave I'm not coming back and tbh I don't think it would make much difference. It's the nature of the beast. All strangers, that's why it's easy to talk because it doesn't directly affect each others lives. Given how frequently people come and go would you really want it to?

 

[WinterFaust]

I agree that it is possible that you just haven't received any of the notifications because I haven't received many for quite some time now, even on threads I've created.

I'm sorry that you've come back at what might likely be a difficult time for you already and feel that no one cares. I think as Brick said, people try to respect others privacy and try not to pry unless someone has made a thread or some other announcement.

I hope you're doing okay otherwise.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I'm not as active here as I was, though I still come on and check. I find it harder to get close to now after losing people, so I tend to keep a respectful distance. Most of the people I knew are gone and when regulars don't log on I figure that's the nature of the site one way or another.
Still, I'm sorry you feel neglected and it's good to see you back.

 

[checkouttime]

I'm not as active here as I was, though I still come on and check. I find it harder to get close to now after losing people, so I tend to keep a respectful distance. Most of the people I knew are gone and when regulars don't log on I figure that's the nature of the site one way or another.
Still, I'm sorry you feel neglected and it's good to see you back.

I thought i read somewhere if you don't log in for a week your account is disabled? I'm sure i did!!

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I thought i read somewhere if you don't log in for a week your account is disabled? I'm sure i did!!

Noooooo, I don't think soooo. This isn't outlook/hotmail (and that's a month I believe).

 

[Squiddy]

I was wondering where you were at

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Did you announce it or slip away quietly?

No I didn´t I was forced to since I was under police investigation that is now cleared up and I wouldn´t announce it anyways so this was in turn a great experiment to see how little I matter.

I remember you. I figured you caught your bus.

Bruh I was legit wondering where you were. I felt like I didn't know you well enough to pry into your business though.

I don´t see it as prying at all since well we are on this forum it would be natural to ask if people have ctb I certainly have asked a few through the time with no responses.

I was wondering where you were at

But didn´t care to live a message even after 3½ month of hell I´ve been in?

I get your disappointment, it always cuts to feel others don't care.

Would you feel a little better if I pointed out that there are 15,000 members on this forum? Not 150, nor 1,500 but 15 - freaking - thousand. That's a whole lot of members!

Or would if make you feel a little less disappointed if I said that every few months there seems to be a reshuffling of the board and old users leave and new ones come? Maybe your friends are not as active anymore.

Anyway that suicide meme thread cracks me up, so that's a great legacy

Welcome back!


I would not pm you, but I'd wonder where you were, as I always read your posts with great interest.

When I say likes I mean responses in notifications not the validation fuel egocentric way people view likes on social media, I was very active on another site that didn´t have likes so all notifications were responses so seeing 1 message about my well-being and 11 notifications was pretty sad especially since sadly and embarrassingly enough this forum along with another is my social life I have no friends not 1 person outside of my family have come into my apartment in over 2 years.

Got also put into a psych ward for about 16 hours since the police found some suicide letters one who was even 6 month old but unfortunately I hadn´t thrown them away and they took my guns i.e. my last hobby from me. After the corona lockdown the gun range was closed for 3½ month and Friday the day before they were to open again I got raided by 5 guys from special forces with MP5´s, bullets proof vests and helmets and the front guy with a large bullet proof shield and a pistol in the other hand with 10 other police officers in normal uniforms and dogs ready in their car. They took my last hobby from me it was even a family activity with my dad and brother and I got a little social interaction at the gun club. So I have been drinking almost every day just to feel a little enjoyment like watching movies while drinking. And why did this all happen? Because of a comment I made on another forum which they refuse to tell me the only thing they could say was there wasn´t anything illegal said in that comment; then why the hell did they have to do this to me they took my guns, knives, PC, laptop, external hardrive, Smartphone all my electronics so luckily after getting back to my apartment from the psych ward I could borrow my little brothers old PC otherwise I would be standing in an apartment with nothing to do I don´t even own a TV. The only positive thing is that I have followed my tapering plan off benzos to perfection despite all this chaos around me which I don´t know how I have been able to.

Btw: I hate the new layout why do forums and social media always think it´s a good idea to change things up it´s annoying what it is it takes me weeks to adjust to the changes, the old worked fine why fix what isn´t broke? The same with Facebook which also have a new ugly update which I can change back to the old for 48 hours untill it becomes permanent I fucking hate change.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

@TheGoodGuy Brother I'm sorry you felt abandoned or unappreciated. This forum has a high turnover rate as you know. You weren't very active before you took your leave of absence either.

We've lost ALOT of long time members recently who would've known more about you and your story. I'm sure atleast some of them would've checked upon you had they not disappeared themselves rather quickly.

I would like to get to know you and your story a bit more than I do. If you're willing and able to share I'm always here if you'd like to chat.

 

[Squiddy]

No I didn´t I was forced to since I was under police investigation that is now cleared up and I wouldn´t announce it anyways so this was in turn a great experiment to see how little I matter.


I don´t see it as prying at all since well we are on this forum it would be natural to ask if people have ctb I certainly have asked a few through the time with no responses.

But didn´t care to live a message even after 3½ month of hell I´ve been in?


When I say likes I mean responses in notifications not the validation fuel egocentric way people view likes on social media, I was very active on another site that didn´t have likes so all notifications were responses so seeing 1 message about my well-being and 11 notifications was pretty sad especially since sadly and embarrassingly enough this forum along with another is my social life I have no friends not 1 person outside of my family have come into my apartment in over 2 years.

Got also put into a psych ward for about 16 hours since the police found some suicide letters one who was even 6 month old but unfortunately I hadn´t thrown them away and they took my guns i.e. my last hobby from me. After the corona lockdown the gun range was closed for 3½ month and Friday the day before they were to open again I got raided by 5 guys from special forces with MP5´s, bullets proof vests and helmets and the front guy with a large bullet proof shield and a pistol in the other hand with 10 other police officers in normal uniforms and dogs ready in their car. They took my last hobby from me it was even a family activity with my dad and brother and I got a little social interaction at the gun club. So I have been drinking almost every day just to feel a little enjoyment like watching movies while drinking. And why did this all happen? Because of a comment I made on another forum which they refuse to tell me the only thing they could say was there wasn´t anything illegal said in that comment; then why the hell did they have to do this to me they took my guns, knives, PC, laptop, external hardrive, Smartphone all my electronics so luckily after getting back to my apartment from the psych ward I could borrow my little brothers old PC otherwise I would be standing in an apartment with nothing to do I don´t even own a TV. The only positive thing is that I have followed my tapering plan off benzos to perfection despite all this chaos around me which I don´t know how I have been able to.

Btw: I hate the new layout why do forums and social media always think it´s a good idea to change things up it´s annoying what it is it takes me weeks to adjust to the changes, the old worked fine why fix what isn´t broke? The same with Facebook which also have a new ugly update which I can change back to the old for 48 hours untill it becomes permanent I fucking hate change.

I saw that LostLife left a message on your page awhile ago saying that you were doing good so I didn't think to leave a message

 

[TheGoodGuy]

You weren't very active before you took your leave of absence either.

I was in fact VERY active on this forum before I left it more than I ever had been I didn´t even use the other forum and sat with this forum open all day every day for months.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

I was in fact VERY active on this forum before I left it more than I ever had been I didn´t even use the other forum and sat with this forum open all day every day for months.

I hope that short quote is not all you took away from what I had to say.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

I hope that short quote is not all you took away from what I had to say.

It wasn´t I even thought to include it all but wanted to adress this certain quote specific. The rest made a lot of sense.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

It wasn´t I even thought to include it all but wanted to adress this certain quote specific. The rest made a lot of sense.

I'm glad atleast some of it resonated with you. Pertaining to your activity before your break I can only comment on what I've witnessed first hand.

I've noticed a pattern of activity and inactivity with you and I figured it was just part of your cycle. I had no reason to believe you were in distress, atleast more so than normal considering where we are.

Ultimately we're talking semantics at this point. You're back now, and I'm genuinely glad that you are. I will once again extend my inbox to you and I hope to see you around more again!

We've lost alot of the OGs recently but a few have made a comeback. @Deafsn0w and @Passingby are back now! We're glad to have you back as well @TheGoodGuy make no mistake about it.

 

[Squiddy]

I'm glad atleast some of it resonated with you. Pertaining to your activity before your break I can only comment on what I've witnessed first hand.

I've noticed a pattern of activity and inactivity with you and I figured it was just part of your cycle. I had no reason to believe you were in distress, atleast more so than normal considering where we are.

Ultimately we're talking semantics at this point. You're back now, and I'm genuinely glad that you are. I will once again extend my inbox to you and I hope to see you around more again!

We've lost alot of the OGs recently but a few have made a comeback. @Deafsn0w and @Passingby are back now! We're glad to have you back as well @TheGoodGuy make no mistake about it.

Yup definitely glad to have you back :)