Avoiding people

[Bodydysmorphia34]

This might sound very misanthropic (I mean, it is ^^) but do you avoid people because of bad experiences? I've reached this point where I don't want to associate with anybody anymore because of my experiences, which is why I live a quite "lonely" lifestyle (zero friends, just family).

I know society considers "loners" as losers but I don't care since I don't want to associate with harmful people

This is one of the main reasons why I have depression since I just can't cope with the evilness of mankind.

 

[SpiritualDeath]

've reached this point where I don't want to associate with anybody anymore because of my experiences, which is why I live a quite "lonely" lifestyle (zero friends, just family).

I do that as well. I'm at the point where I don't even want to associate with family anymore.
This feels freeing tbh...nothing wrong with being a loner (and you're definitely not a loser bc of this). ppl with relationships are not as happy as they claim to be.
When ppl approach you they're always with constant needs and desires that they want to use you to fulfill. Dealing with this kind of thing is exhausting. I avoid this as much as possible.

 

[Quiet_Observer]

I feel the same way, but it also extends to random people when I walk outside my house. I get extremely scared whenever I see a car stopping to let me cross the street, so I just pretend that im walking some other direction until there are no cars at all. I do this so I don't have to interact with them.

 

[Kundalini Guy]

Fuck what society thinks, if this makes you happy so be it

 

[HollowDrop]

I do quite often. I've been massively betrayed by people I thought I could trust and it's left a permanent scar in me. I do make new acquaintances but I am very prone to pushing them away as my mental self defense kicks in out of fear that they are going to stab me in the back too. I can't trust anyone, even if they are my friend.
I'm glad to hear you at least got your family, that on its own is a wonderful social connection many should have but unfortunately don't.

There's nothing wrong with being more of a loner if it fits your nature, I'm alone most of the time cause I get socially exhausted very easily. We are all different individuals, some have bigger social needs than others. Social norms are stupid.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

In most situations I keep to myself. This is not to say that I deliberately ignore others - unless they have been awful to me - but I just dislike conversations in general, because the majority of them seem false or forced, and what is the point in talking to someone who is not really interested in your welfare? I do (and can) talk if it is really needed, but I try to keep it basic and friendly. There was a period in my life around 10 years ago when I found a small group who I had a connection to, and I did open up to them more than I do with most other people. Though they are since lone gone, so I have reverted back to how I was in my earlier teenage years.

I know society considers "loners" as losers but I don't care since I don't want to associate with harmful people

I never really understood this view. Society dictates that relationships are not mandatory; even somebody in a street is not required to hold a simple conversation with you. Because of this we also have it dictated to us that we must learn to accept rejection from other people. While holding this view society, or rather the majority of people within it, will simultaneously shame a person for being a so-called "loner", as you have put it. Why? This is unfair. Do people who prefer their own company not have the same boundaries as everybody else?

If a person or a group attacks you simply for wanting to be alone then there is a chance that they never liked, or cared about you in the first place. If you try to be more outgoing with them they would find some other characteristic in you that they dislike instead, because they were never a good "fit" for you to begin with. They want your attention; not your friendship.

 

[ClownWorld2023]

but do you avoid people because of bad experiences?

Yes, and also because of bad health and crippling depression, so I don't have the energy to deal with other peoples' nonsense.

I know society considers "loners" as losers but I don't care since I don't want to associate with harmful people

This is one of the main reasons why I have depression since I just can't cope with the evilness of mankind.

Society in general is full of stupid people, so their opinion doesn't really matter.

This might sound very misanthropic (I mean, it is ^^)

Nothing wrong with some good old misanthropy.

 

[BlackMoon]

I do have bad experiences with people but now I just don't have any occasion to meet people IRL, I don't even have to avoid them anymore.

 

[AloeGarten]

i have avpd and bad social anxiety, honestly feels like i have an allergy to humans. shit gets lonely sometimes but i suppose you get numb to it after a while huh

 

[Life_and_Death]

do you avoid people because of bad experiences

yes

as far as i know, i have yet to meet anyone as misanthropic as me.
i treat others the way im treated, anyone that knows me knows im actually a really nice/kind hearted person, that would most likely do anything for anyone.
however when the very very very high majority of people do nothing expect be pricks and cause problems...yeah...im not gonna give a fuck about you.

(off on a bit of a tangent.
"treat others the way im treated" is kinda funny because that means you wouldnt ever stand up for someone else. "oh, theyre not treating me that way" but the saying is typically about being nice lol)

 

[staplestable]

most social interactions feel forced to me and I end up thinking 'what's the point in this?'
although its nice when you have someone you feel comfortable with and you subconsciously express and enjoy yourself