At a dead end at this point. No pun intended.

[shadow_sunset]

I dont know if anyone has heard but there was this one guy on the news who charged his phone during a snowstorm in his car and died of CO poisoning. I know he felt no pain so i was inspired, but as my luck has it i had no snow where i live this year (that sums up my life guys) so it sent me into a CO method deep dive. Which is where i am at, i just found out that someone in here tried that method and survived. My worst fear is making my situation already worse by being a vegetable and being a burden so that pretty much went out the window. I dont want to hang myself and i dont have an anchor point and id rather not die in my messy closet. I dont own a gun nor can i and its just making this really difficult, i cant obtain SN without being tracked down and i just have no idea. Although recently there was a guy in the news who was on trial for being raping someone and he killed himself, my plan was originally that too, to drown myself since i cant swim but now the idea of dying there with that rapist is disgusting to me, i dont know what to do guys, i just want to die, i dont like being alive, all i want is to die with some dignity, i do think if i had a gun id have already done it but sadly i cant get one nor anyone i know has one, any ways im missing? please help me