Story As I continue upward, I feel my connection here fade

[Inferdan]

Hey everyone.
Before anything, just want to reassure everyone I'm doing ok. It's getting easier. I mean, things still happen that stress me out, but it's a lot lot less than what it used to be. I'm ok. I'm closer than I've ever been before.
One sad thing however is that because of it, I don't visit here or the discord server as often. Well, I guess it isn't bad since it shows I'm moving forward, but it's sad to leave everyone behind here. Because of my random appearances and non-contributive talk, I'm beginning to feel out of place. I'm no longer fitting in. As much as I hate to say it, I'm beginning to, to put it in a way, "tune into another wavelength".
I'm considering it, but there may be a time soon when I'll have to go. It's sad, and I care for you all so much...well, that's all I have to say now, guys. Hope you all find a reason to smile today :)

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I understand what you mean and I sometimes feel the same. I think it's both a good and natural thing.

 

[Sensei]

Then go and don't look back. The more of us who can escape the grip of death, the better. I wish I could follow your example.

 

[Sinai Silence]

Surely that is a good thing. I hope you're able to continue looking onward and upwards in life.

 

[Mustkeyknow]

You're so lucky
How did you do it?

 

[Inferdan]

I understand what you mean and I sometimes feel the same. I think it's both a good and natural thing.

I believe it is the same...

Then go and don't look back. The more of us who can escape the grip of death, the better. I wish I could follow your example.

It may happen without my intention. And with enough time, you'll be able to. Guess that's how it was for me, at least. Get the tools that'll help you, and persist. Fight off any dark thoughts, do things at your own pace, and do the bare minimum. Simply the mindset for recovery will get things started. You got this, I believe you could do it if you tried.

Surely that is a good thing. I hope you're able to continue looking onward and upwards in life.

Oh, it definitely is. It'll be sad to leave you all behind, however. That's the only thing I am sad about. You've all been great to talk to. So interesting and kind. Hate that life decided to put you all like this...wish I could make things better for you all.
And thank you, Sinai :)

You're so lucky
How did you do it?

Honestly, I am lucky to even be here in this moment. I'm lucky to have found SS. I'm lucky to have had that break the night before my planned ctb. How did I do it? I persisted despite it all. All the doubts, the dark thoughts trying to snake in and twist my mind slowly without me noticing (had to realise and beat them away before they did), making myself go forward when bad things happened, and slowly put my life and myself back together. Took me I think 3-4cmonths, maybe 5, from that night to now. I had to run on solely willpower at moments because I was stripped of everything else. I have no motivation and drive, but it's coming back, and it's the last piece left before I'm complete again. Then, I'll have control over everything again, and my transition and recovery is finished.
So...how did I do it? Persist. Getting up and going forward even with the storm and hail. Go at your own pace, but don't go too slow. Both you and time will slowly bring you back. Just have to work for it and fight for it. That's me, at least. Luck played a part in it, as well, but they were mostly chances given to me to recover instead of a boost.
Just don't give up. Never give up. That's how I did it.

 

[Sensei]

And with enough time, you'll be able to. Guess that's how it was for me, at least. Get the tools that'll help you, and persist. Fight off any dark thoughts, do things at your own pace, and do the bare minimum. Simply the mindset for recovery will get things started. You got this, I believe you could do it if you tried.

Unfortunately, it's a little bit more complex than that. I'm bipolar and the only thing which can save me is medication. I can't control how well the medicines work. It doesn't help that I'm getting old either. The older you get, the more difficult it becomes to change your life circumstances. It doesn't look too good to be honest. I have yet to give up hope, though.

 

[BPD Barbie]

Don't be sad, be happy! Keep making progress and moving forward

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I believe it is the same...

It may happen without my intention. And with enough time, you'll be able to. Guess that's how it was for me, at least. Get the tools that'll help you, and persist. Fight off any dark thoughts, do things at your own pace, and do the bare minimum. Simply the mindset for recovery will get things started. You got this, I believe you could do it if you tried.

Oh, it definitely is. It'll be sad to leave you all behind, however. That's the only thing I am sad about. You've all been great to talk to. So interesting and kind. Hate that life decided to put you all like this...wish I could make things better for you all.
And thank you, Sinai :)

Honestly, I am lucky to even be here in this moment. I'm lucky to have found SS. I'm lucky to have had that break the night before my planned ctb. How did I do it? I persisted despite it all. All the doubts, the dark thoughts trying to snake in and twist my mind slowly without me noticing (had to realise and beat them away before they did), making myself go forward when bad things happened, and slowly put my life and myself back together. Took me I think 3-4cmonths, maybe 5, from that night to now. I had to run on solely willpower at moments because I was stripped of everything else. I have no motivation and drive, but it's coming back, and it's the last piece left before I'm complete again. Then, I'll have control over everything again, and my transition and recovery is finished.
So...how did I do it? Persist. Getting up and going forward even with the storm and hail. Go at your own pace, but don't go too slow. Both you and time will slowly bring you back. Just have to work for it and fight for it. That's me, at least. Luck played a part in it, as well, but they were mostly chances given to me to recover instead of a boost.
Just don't give up. Never give up. That's how I did it.

You have my admiration. Persist, yes! Stubborn determination and slow progress is a remarkable thing.