![rotten](/data/avatars/l/27/27634.jpg?1618638859)
rotten
Student
- Apr 14, 2021
- 102
When you decide to ctb, will you leave a note behind for your family, significant other, or friends?
I don't really plan on leaving one unless I can ensure it will only be kept between a few friends and not my family. I doubt that would happen though. I know that sounds harsh but I never had the best relationship with my family.
When I was about 14 years old I got caught at school for having suicidal thoughts (my friend snitched). They sent me to the crisis center which I fucking hated because nobody listened to what I was saying. It was like I wasn't even in the room at times. Anyways, after being there for who knows how long, I changed my mind on ctb for the time being. I had my note stuffed in my underwear for safe keeping. I told the nurse to take me to the bathroom and from there I tore up the note, threw it in the trash can, and then buried everything with used paper towels.
These motherfuckers really found all the pieces, put it together, and then sent a neat little photocopy to my parents.
I know now to flush things like that but back then I was 14, stupid, and out of it.
My mother held that note over my head for a solid year. She would basically use it as a form of blackmail. If I didn't do this or if I did something she didn't like, she would threaten to send my note to everyone that way they can make fun of me and see how "crazy" I am.
Eventually one day my mom had to leave for the afternoon. It was a rare occasion where I was left in the house all by myself since my incident. I went into her closet and took that photocopy along with other paperwork from the crisis center and flushed it down the toilet. I didn't find the original though, I think the center still had it or threw it away by now. I was also lucky my parents aren't tech savvy so I'm pretty sure they never made more copies.
So for that, I don't think they deserve a final note from me.
I don't really plan on leaving one unless I can ensure it will only be kept between a few friends and not my family. I doubt that would happen though. I know that sounds harsh but I never had the best relationship with my family.
When I was about 14 years old I got caught at school for having suicidal thoughts (my friend snitched). They sent me to the crisis center which I fucking hated because nobody listened to what I was saying. It was like I wasn't even in the room at times. Anyways, after being there for who knows how long, I changed my mind on ctb for the time being. I had my note stuffed in my underwear for safe keeping. I told the nurse to take me to the bathroom and from there I tore up the note, threw it in the trash can, and then buried everything with used paper towels.
These motherfuckers really found all the pieces, put it together, and then sent a neat little photocopy to my parents.
I know now to flush things like that but back then I was 14, stupid, and out of it.
My mother held that note over my head for a solid year. She would basically use it as a form of blackmail. If I didn't do this or if I did something she didn't like, she would threaten to send my note to everyone that way they can make fun of me and see how "crazy" I am.
Eventually one day my mom had to leave for the afternoon. It was a rare occasion where I was left in the house all by myself since my incident. I went into her closet and took that photocopy along with other paperwork from the crisis center and flushed it down the toilet. I didn't find the original though, I think the center still had it or threw it away by now. I was also lucky my parents aren't tech savvy so I'm pretty sure they never made more copies.
So for that, I don't think they deserve a final note from me.