Venting Are you at a crossroads?

[Monet]

In American folklore, crossroads are a place of liminality. You are between places. You are not even on a set path to your destination, fate, or eventual end. It is a place of nonexistence, you are nowhere and in between all set destinations, purposes, or states of being. In history, criminals were often buried at crossroads as a sign of disrespect, as a representation of the misfortune their lives caused them. Their souls now subject to a transient afterlife without rest, without destination. In many stories, it is considered a fate worse than hell. They say it is within these places that represent a lack of defined growth, development, or transformation, the devil appears to tempt you into some greater life, position, or power. A promise of an accomplishment you could never achieve in a barren place like this. Some 20th century blues songs reflect this, and giving all due credit to the myth surrounding late blues musician and that man believed to have invented rock and roll, Robert Johnson.

I feel I am at a crossroads constantly. Spiritually, emotionally, my current state of life is always transient. I am not what I once was nor am I in a state of becoming. I am not growing into anything. The true hell lies here, in the inability to feel or grow, there are no words to describe how painful it is.

 

[bluemoirai]

Your post is great. This is also typical of Slavic folklore. People even left their belongings there to "pass on" their illnesses to someone else.
I can relate to your feelings, but I'm curious what you mean by "growth"?

 

[Monet]

Your post is great. This is also typical of Slavic folklore. People even left their belongings there to "pass on" their illnesses to someone else.
I can relate to your feelings, but I'm curious what you mean by "growth"?

This is interesting to know. I have found similar representations in African, Latin, and Brazilian folklore, and find it incredibly interesting to study the similarities between stories, representations, and how others best reflect and relate to the material.

By growth I mean a sense of stunted development emotionally and cognitively. Normal, well-developed people usually have an establishment of appropriate indicators as they grow. Normal indicators include the ability to understand peers, communicate effectively, form bonds, interests, passions, and relationships. Abnormal indicators include a lack of interest in peer relationships, a persistent melancholia, and an inability to understand social cues, rules, and boundaries.

To quote the 1975 Plaquemines Parish John Doe "My brain always worked at cross-purposes to my real development. I was a withdrawn baby who became an unpleasant, withdrawn person. When you stop growing you are dead. I stopped growing long ago."

The above statement, with the utmost respect to the unidentified victim and his family, is one of the most accurate and relatable statements regarding my own experience with depression and isolation that I've read, which is why I have referenced it here. I hope that's brings a bit more clarity than my original post.