Discussion Are you a time bomb?

[WornOutLife]

Lately, I've been feeling like a time bomb; I might explode any time soon.
Perhaps it's because of my bipolar disorder which DOWNS make me go crazy but the UPS... damn, they're beautiful!

However, things are actually going pretty well. I'm working more, studying, found some cool anime and shows to watch, etc. My only problem is that I'm getting fatter because I'm too lazy to work out lol.

What about you? Are you a time bomb? Could you just get fed up with life suddenly and try to ctb impulsively? I think I might!

 

[orlandom]

Lately, I've been feeling like a time bomb; I might explode at any time soon.
Perhaps it's because of my bipolar disorder which DOWNS make me go crazy but the UPS... damn, they're beautiful!

However, things are actually going pretty well. I'm working more, studying, found some cool anime and shows to watch, etc. My only problem is that I'm getting fatter because I'm too lazy to work out lol.

What about you? Are you a time bomb? Could you just get fed up with life suddenly and try to ctb impulsively? I think I might!

The wick practically burns out

 

[DarkWolf]

Yes! I'm basically a ticking time bomb.

 

[Odwin]

Oh yeah, was gonna blow up today. By the time I was finally alone. It defused itself.

 

[AnnonyBox]

Socially, yes, I am. It seems like from the moment I join a group my clock is ticking until some point as when drama starts in the group, and I feel that I have to lash out in order to be heard. Innevitably, I end up leaving behind friends and groups, since ghere can be no expectation of resolution.

 

[Carrotcake]

Nope. Dying slow and steady here

 

[Isisnefert]

I think my end is near and the countdown is activated

 

[Makko]

Nope. Dying slow and steady here

Slow and steady wins the race (to the bottom of the grave).

 

[loopylou]

I haven't taken my anti depressants in about 6 weeks or so now. I had bpd but before I started Quetiapine I would have ' manic ' and' depressive ' states.
For 6 years I have been really lazy, wallowing in self pity and got fatter than I'd like. In the last 5 weeks I have definitely been more manic. Obsessive cleaning and par taking in wreckless behaviour. But I feel ALIVE! I like it

 

[ExhaustedExistence]

Definitely! My mood changes hundred times in one day. I think I have the bipolar disorder too, but I haven't been diagnosed, because I'm really scared of the psych wards.

I could be quite calm all day, but only one little thing can make me explode like a time bomb. I had a really bad day some time ago, when my grandmother told me something mean and I cried for the rest of day. I couldn't stop, I cried even in a shower. But nowadays I can't cry at all.

I think ctb impulsively is the key for me, because I always overthink everything. In one minute I really want ctb, but in other minute I have some fake hope. I don't understand why I'm so unstable.

 

[W’ren]

I'm meticulously planning- but i'm also able to act on impulse, as i did a couple of weeks back.
Fragile like a bomb

 

[zirikov]

I guess I'm, somehow. I lost my father last week and I just wish I could buy SN or something. Went to the roof of my building 2 times in this week to see if I could jump from there. Unfortunately, at night it's locked. I guess I'm almost exploding.

 

[fred farkle]

time bomb? no,i am a dud!

 

[Deformationalplagio]

Yes could happen any momment any time. Im living in a rollercoaster between sad angry and numb. I dont know what will be the strongest emotion in the end but i hope i dont lose my sanity and do some bad stuff

 

[LastFlowers]

Yes! I'm basically a ticking time bomb.

Me too. I feel like a pressure cooker and I feel like I've already exploded multiple times, but I'm now getting closer to reaching full capacity and taking out everything within a thousand mile radius.

 

[WaterHemlock]

Oh yeah, definitely a bomb with a time limit on it.
I react to things that push me closer to the edge all the time, but the length of the timer is the time that is left til my niece moves out and I have the privacy to 'move on'.
I suppose there's always a chance that somehow I'll find a good place to live that I can afford on my $773 social security income, that won't make me automatically self destruct and I settle in for a slow decline instead.
Miracles happen every day.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think if someone is seriously suicidal there is only for so long they can function and fake emotions until they finally break. It is just the way that humans are. As for me I kinda feel like i've already died in a way as I feel mostly numb to it all. However if something pushes me over the edge I might feel the urge to ctb. I do long for death all the time though.
(After reading this thread I now have the song Timebomb by All Time Low stuck in my head, my brain likes to play songs on a loop :/

 

[landojustwannactb]

Lately, I've been feeling like a time bomb; I might explode any time soon.
Perhaps it's because of my bipolar disorder which DOWNS make me go crazy but the UPS... damn, they're beautiful!

However, things are actually going pretty well. I'm working more, studying, found some cool anime and shows to watch, etc. My only problem is that I'm getting fatter because I'm too lazy to work out lol.

What about you? Are you a time bomb? Could you just get fed up with life suddenly and try to ctb impulsively? I think I might!

I do feel u on being a ticking time bomb but not bc of being or having BPD. Ive been wanting to die for some time now but with no target date. But i feel like a really rough day will make we just go thru with it in the spur of the moment if u know what i mean. Idk if im making any sense haha

 

[ShadowSide]

I'm actually waiting for a time to explode. I have been planning for a very long time and in the end I realised it's was just coping mechanism. I no longer plan, I've tried the whole trying thing but now I'm just waiting till it gets so dark and I can impulsively end it all. My sn is on stand by at all times.

 

[Beachedwhale]

Yes. I'm trying with great difficulty to defuse it but time is running out.

 

[sadbadpsychogirl]

no. everybody thinks i am but no.

 

[sm20]

Lately, I've been feeling like a time bomb; I might explode any time soon.
Perhaps it's because of my bipolar disorder which DOWNS make me go crazy but the UPS... damn, they're beautiful!

However, things are actually going pretty well. I'm working more, studying, found some cool anime and shows to watch, etc. My only problem is that I'm getting fatter because I'm too lazy to work out lol.

What about you? Are you a time bomb? Could you just get fed up with life suddenly and try to ctb impulsively? I think I might!

I'm basically the opposite I've been on the verge of trying 8 times and I always end up changing my mind. If the method isn't good enough I get stressed about surviving, if I have access to a good method I get stressed about what's on the other side and if there would be some punishment for putting my family through my death.

My fear is that I'll get better not to the point where life is worth living but I stay in a state of being depressed but not depressed enough to do anything.

I guess I'm, somehow. I lost my father last week and I just wish I could buy SN or something. Went to the roof of my building 2 times in this week to see if I could jump from there. Unfortunately, at night it's locked. I guess I'm almost exploding.

You could go during the day and hide there until night, although jumping isn't great even onto concrete you have to be 150 feet high to have a 95-98% chance of dying.