Anyone who has transitioned from male to female and found love?

[Parnate]

I am a gay man and always daydreamt about being a woman and having a loving caring husband. Also i always wanted to feel sex as a woman. Anyone over here who changed their gender from man to woman and found love? How is your life? Do you feel satisfied with it?

 

[xXiloveyouXx]

i did, started hormones in 2022 when i was 20. ive dated quite a few people, all women, while living as a trans woman and have been in love once, though it's over now. ive basically detransitioned now for the most part socially and mentally. It's hard to transition and you really do need to have thick skin. I never was able to shake off the feeling of being stared at and being judged in public and even though I can pass as either gender depending on the context, presenting as a woman in public is really scary.

In my personal case I am an extremely weird person and my perspective of gender has evolved since I started transitioning. Before, I wanted so bad to be a woman that it would tear me up inside and leave me depressed for days in burning pain. Now it's as if there are two of me, one male and one female, and they take turns in the driver's seat and for the past year at least I've mostly genuinely felt like a man. Like it's something inescapable that I can't outrun. Whatever anybody thinks my gender is, I just go along with it for fun because I don't even know what I am myself half the time. Idk. If you're sure you wanna transition weigh the risks, especially the social and safety risks, and then go for it, but further down the line you may have an existential epiphany like me and change your mind.

 

[neurotoxic]

i did, started hormones in 2022 when i was 20. ive dated quite a few people, all women, while living as a trans woman and have been in love once, though it's over now. ive basically detransitioned now for the most part socially and mentally. It's hard to transition and you really do need to have thick skin. I never was able to shake off the feeling of being stared at and being judged in public and even though I can pass as either gender, presenting as a woman in public is really scary.

In my personal case I am an extremely weird person and my perspective of gender has evolved since I started transitioning. Before, I wanted so bad to be a woman that it would tear me up inside and leave me depressed for days in burning pain. Now it's as if there are two of me, one male and one female, and they take turns in the driver's seat and for the past year at least I've mostly genuinely felt like a man. Like it's something inescapable that I can't outrun. Whatever anybody thinks my gender is, I just go along with it for fun because I don't even know what I am myself half the time. Idk. If you're sure you wanna transition weigh the risks, especially the social and safety risks, and then go for it, but further down the line you may have an existential epiphany like me and change your mind.

Not to hijack the thread but this so closely resembles my experience i just wanted to thank you for making my own existential epiphany feel a bit more valid

 

[xXiloveyouXx]

Not to hijack the thread but this so closely resembles my experience i just wanted to thank you for making my own existential epiphany feel a bit more valid

tbh im convinced that this weird place we inhabit is the natural endpoint of transitioning. You take it ultra seriously at first, then you feel the boundaries loosen and then dissolve and the entire structural framework of gender begins to crumble and you realize these categories are dead in the modern world anyway and nobody even realizes it yet, so it's fun to play with it lol. i think identification with symbolic archetypes cuts to the heart of what identity is much more than simple gender binaries, and depending on what the archetype you feel aligned with at that point in your life, it may be expressed through either masculine or feminine language. or neither. or both.

all of these identity categories we cling to emerge out of the relations between you and others, and with the world too, meaning how you conceptualize yourself in relation to a specific person (let's say your father - and in your interactions with him you play the role of some flavor of the son) or wider social situation (at a party where you take on the feminine role of the social butterfly party girl for instance) or society itself (viewing yourself as an alienated salaryman) is not how you would understand yourself if you were to live on a deserted island never meeting another person. I'm not so sure there is any self at all to begin with. only desire, lack, and the "you" that is generated for each situation you find yourself in, as well as the symbols you identify with when narrating your own experiences to yourself.

When I narrativize my experiences to myself I feel like a tragic sort of figure, obsessive and neurotic and with a heavy burden on my heart. I'm kind of a creepy scumbag too if we're being honest. These all have the associations of being more masculine traits than feminine.