Anyone triggered by positivity?

[Water-Lily]

I used to be a part of the reddit subreddit raisedbynarcissists. (RBN) for short, it's a subreddit that focuses on healing form abusive parents. Though I relate to it and was a prt of it actively for some time, I just cannot be a part of it like I used to

So much reminds me of my own abuse along with a strong desire to get people away from suicide feels so uncomfortable. I don't care if my abusers "win" if I die.

 

[BlackPoppet]

I used to be a part of the reddit subreddit raisedbynarcissists. (RBN) for short, it's a subreddit that focuses on healing form abusive parents. Though I relate to it and was a prt of it actively for some time, I just cannot be a part of it like I used to

So much reminds me of my own abuse along with a strong desire to get people away from suicide feels so uncomfortable. I don't care if my abusers "win" if I die.

Hugs from me to you! Xxx
I'm here if you need someone to talk to!

 

[Sprite_Geist]

It depends on what you mean. I do not have a problem with actual positivity - as in just being kind, but I dislike the so-called "positivity" that can be seen in online communities like Reddit, Twitter, et cetera; because that type of positivity is often passive-aggressive and not genuine.

 

[Water-Lily]

It depends on what you mean. I do not have a problem with actual positivity - as in just being kind, but I dislike the so-called "positivity" that can be seen in online communities like Reddit, Twitter, et cetera; because that type of positivity is often passive-aggressive and not genuine.

I should clarify. Positivity as in kindness as you mentioned is something I'm ok with. I guess what I am trying to communicate is more or so when people say "to keep fighting" when maybe you are so tired of existing you don't want to fight for life

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I should clarify. Positivity as in kindness as you mentioned is something I'm ok with. I guess what I am trying to communicate is more or so when people say "to keep fighting" when maybe you are so tired of existing you don't want to fight for life

Oh yes I understood what you were talking about in your initial post. When I said that I dislike the second "type" of positivity it included what you are talking about, because I agree with what you; though it is probably my fault for not expanding on my answer more.

 

[Dagon]

I can relate. I absolutely hate it when I see other people telling suicidal people that "it gets better" or even worse, when they tell them that most people who attempt suicide regrets it. I honestly get kind of angry just from thinking about all the times I've seen strangers telling others that they "care" or anything of that sort.

 

[Quiet Desperation]

I used to be a part of the reddit subreddit raisedbynarcissists. (RBN) for short, it's a subreddit that focuses on healing form abusive parents. Though I relate to it and was a prt of it actively for some time, I just cannot be a part of it like I used to

So much reminds me of my own abuse along with a strong desire to get people away from suicide feels so uncomfortable. I don't care if my abusers "win" if I die.

Yeah, it's one of my biggest pet peeves. "The tyranny of positivity" as Susan David calls it. Check out this video from her which I thought really nails it:

 

[Endeavour]

I'm triggered by the notion of being triggered. It's like I'm a landmine, so be careful not to upset me. Me. Me. Me. Don't trigger me by disagreeing with my thoughts on being triggered, or you'll trigger me. Triggered.

 

[Meditation guide]

I used to be a part of the reddit subreddit raisedbynarcissists. (RBN) for short, it's a subreddit that focuses on healing form abusive parents. Though I relate to it and was a prt of it actively for some time, I just cannot be a part of it like I used to

So much reminds me of my own abuse along with a strong desire to get people away from suicide feels so uncomfortable. I don't care if my abusers "win" if I die.

I learned all about narcissism recently and it was very triggering. No it's not helpful when you've made up your mind to die to have anyone try to talk you out of it with lame reasons not to.

 

[Water-Lily]

I learned all about narcissism recently and it was very triggering. No it's not helpful when you've made up your mind to die to have anyone try to talk you out of it with lame reasons not to.

Yeah I've been told "don't let your abusers win" and "fight back and get revenge by living the fullest"
BuT WhAt If I DoNt WaNt To?!

 

[SHThrowAway213]

Yes!
I absolutely HATE those posts like, "I overcame depression by doing this, so can you!"
I mean, I'm all happy for you, but some people just don't or can't get better from the mental illness, or can't get the help, and even then, sometimes that doesn't help.
Browsing through reddit, I saw a post on suicide watch saying Therapy didn't help, now I've wasted a lot of money and feel even worse.
I also find those posts a bit insensitive too.
Some people find them inspiring, I mean that's fine, but it's just wrong.
A local news website put out an article like "This nurse wanted to share her inspirational story of how her colleagues saved her from the brink of death!"
Article was saying she didn't go into work and took an overdose and was saved and now she is better, and she has also wrote a book detailing her experiences and that she did a lot of research on how to do it.
She spent 4 months sectioned receiving therapy, including ECT and she is still out of work recovering.
Not many people can afford to stay out of work for that long.
Very good for you, I'm glad that you received the help you need, but that isn't the normal anymore.
We are left to suffer to our own devices these days.
Also, an overdose?
I mean, they are 8% fatal, and I'm thinking if she did do her research, She would of found it out and also being a nurse too.

"Clare credits NHS nurses and her wider family and friends for getting her through those initial few months, as well as the therapy she has been receiving, taking up running again and going for walks after getting a puppy."
Great that you got the support you needed and that people weren't judgemental and that you got therapy, but again, there is a stigma against mental health, and most people don't receive help that they need.
But I have actually read that exercise helps, and it works for her which is good, and I know how much my own dog helps.
All the comments was "So inspiring!" "Glad she was able to overcome it." Ect.
I was just thinking that what happened to her is not the norm these days.
I obviously would not be able to comment all of this on Facebook though, but it just rubbed me the wrong way.
I'm not criticising the nurse, I'm just pointing stuff out, it pissed me off.
This news site has also reported on 5 suicides in the past week too, 2 of them being a husband and wife that died a few weeks apart of intentional overdoses.
Did they also get the help they needed if they asked for it?
Probably not, I know I fucking didn't.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

I am when it's unjustified or especially in the context of corporate and government marketing. If there is a legitimate reason for it then no

 

[SHThrowAway213]

You seem messed up with your family there's no need to bring it over here you clearly aren't serious about suicide. So I say again: Why are you here?

Right, I gotta ask, what gives you the impression they are not serious about suicide?
There is no reason to be judgemental.
Also, a lot of us have messed up childhoods and we can post what we like as this is a support website, a lot of people do.
It's up to them what they post.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

The fact she's deleted her posts.

That's fair enough can't comment as I haven't seen them, but this person has posted quite a bit about their family since they joined, that's all I'm saying.

 

[Meditation guide]

I used to be a part of the reddit subreddit raisedbynarcissists. (RBN) for short, it's a subreddit that focuses on healing form abusive parents. Though I relate to it and was a prt of it actively for some time, I just cannot be a part of it like I used to

So much reminds me of my own abuse along with a strong desire to get people away from suicide feels so uncomfortable. I don't care if my abusers "win" if I die.

You're such a nice person and I want so much for things to get better for you. Ignore these negative comments. I know you want to die and are going through a lot of struggles. Not sure why people make such cruel comments or feel they have a right to judge you.

This is supposed to be a supportive site. I can't believe how mean some people here are.

 

[Water-Lily]

You're such a nice person and I want so much for things to get better for you. Ignore these negative comments. I know you want to die and are going through a lot of struggles. Not sure why people make such cruel comments or feel they have a right to judge you.

Thank you. Your comment makes me smile :)

 

[SHThrowAway213]

Some people do actually wanna ctb here and say goodbye to life without vultures circling around endlessly over every sincere goodbye thread, discussing how they themselves will try and pull off their own SN method (which we all know is never going to happen)...

Some people are scared to die alone, and this process makes it easier.
It is completely up to people if they want to make a goodbye thread or not.
I mean, there has also been cases of people live streaming their suicide, and even a couple of suicides live on TV.
Whatever makes it easier for people, as it is quite a big decision.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

No, what I mean is that @Meditation guide is a vampire of the poor souls who wish to actually ctb. Just look at her post history. All she cares about is how she can use an SN death to help her own demise.

From what I've seen, she has always been very supportive and helpful towards other members here.
I have never seen this behaviour of which you are describing from her.

 

[Meditation guide]

. Just look at her post history.

Let's look at yours right in this thread. I don't talk to people the way you talk to me or the others here. I wouldn't be so mean.

I have never seen this behaviour of which you are describing from her.

Of course not. I'm not mean.

 

[Frauw]

Depends on the type of positivity, I don't like blind positivty because it usually leads to absent mindedness, sometimes you need to feel bad to learn, for some strange reason modern culture is obsessed with "positive vibes only" which is toxic in itself because there's no critical thinking involved, just as toxic negativity is also blinding.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

@Meditation guide

In all honesty yes. The way you are so cold on all those goodbye threads, just thinking about yourself. It's kind of brutal.

I don't tend to go on those threads, but is there a chance that she is relating to her own experiences and you are perceiving it wrong?
I can't see her acting cold or brutal towards anyone.
Edit:
I have seen that you two have apologised on your other thread.
I will take myself away from the discussion, I was trying to be respectful and find out viewpoints.
Glad this is all sorted now.

 

[Water-Lily]

Depends on the type of positivity, I don't like blind positivty because it usually leads to absent mindedness, sometimes you need to feel bad to learn, for some strange reason modern culture is obsessed with "positive vibes only" which is toxic in itself because there's no critical thinking involved, just as toxic negativity is also blinding.

I definitely agree with this. Obstacles and push back is a normal part of growth. However as you said, toxic positivity is just toxic

In my case its more so or less just being fed up. I understand it comes from a good place when someone says "keep on living" or "it gets better" or "don't give your abusers power". And I believed these strongly when I was being abused by my mom when I was 13. And things never got better. Despite now being 23 and she having died 2 years ago, I still want to die

I am just fed up is all.

 

[Meditation guide]

I still want to die

Have you tried telling them that? Maybe it would open their eyes that it's not that easy to stop wanting to die.

I keep thinking somehow people need to be educated about what it feels like to be suicidal so they understand.

 

[Water-Lily]

Have you tried telling them that? Maybe it would open their eyes that it's not that easy to stop wanting to die.

I keep thinking somehow people need to be educated about what it feels like to be suicidal so they understand.

Well these particular people were strangers online giving me support at the time.

I just know in my heart my thoughts and desires on suicide are real.

 

[demuic]

Toxic positivity is a real problem. It's why people with depression and suicidal desires get pushed to the edge of society, because it's too "uncomfortable" for them to think about. They'd rather drown themselves in their "positive vibes I'm a good person be kind to everyone" facade as if saying shit like that enough times will make it true.

 

[callofthevoid]

Not really triggered, but more of concern as to how toxic positivity is affecting everything. It comes to the point where we're forced to always be happy all the time and something must be wrong with you if you're not.

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

Not triggered, just tired.

Here, I posted this a while ago. A shame OP's post had to be taken down.

 

[Sherri]

Not so much triggered, but very upset when people tell me hang on, life is beautiful, you will see it.And go for walks helps so much....

 

[OnlyTheWind]

Go be positive somewhere else.

 

[WhatDoesTheFoxSay?]

Go be positive somewhere else.

To our dear 'guests'.