Anyone here dealing with dysphoria?

[Nymph]

I've been dealing with this for a long time but I recently shared this with my mom, at first she was very against it but after a while she let the idea into her mind and she said she will consider paying for my mastectomy after she talks to it about my dad and stuff. I really hope it works out and honestly just the fact she said she will consider is has helped me a lot but there's still a lot of times I feel hopeless because I don't know how far in the future is will become reality and I don't know how long I can take it here in this fucked up world, with a bunch of mental health issues and this body. Anyone else here dealing with the same problems? Is it one of your reasons for ctb? (Not being accepted, can't get surgery/hormones.....)

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

If you regret it, there's no turning back. I mean there is, but with a significant cost. Please think about it more carefully. I do not think that chopping away body parts would make you happy.

 

[Nymph]

If you regret it, there's no turning back. I mean there is, but with a significant cost. Please think about it more carefully. I do not think that chopping away body parts would make you happy.

I have thought about it for a few years already, I have always felt wrong in this body. Of course surgery won't help me with all my problems but one of the reasons I'm so depressed is because of body dysphoria. I also don't feel like going on if I'm in the wrong body and have to live with this and look at myself everyday.

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

I have thought about it for a few years already, I have always felt wrong in this body. Of course surgery won't help me with all my problems but one of the reasons I'm so depressed is because of body dysphoria. I also don't feel like going on if I'm in the wrong body and have to live with this and look at myself everyday.

What if you feel the same or even worse after the surgery? There were cases of people who did. I think that once a person starts modifying their body through surgery, it is hard to stop and the feeling of contentment with one's body is very fleeting.

 

[waived]

Anyone else here dealing with the same problems? Is it one of your reasons for ctb? (Not being accepted, can't get surgery/hormones.....)

Yeah you're definitely not alone in this.

 

[Deleted member 23586]

Me! God with so much of my body. People who don't have dysphoria or anything about being not cis/heteronormative would have a very hard time understanding if at all. It's legit torture. I hope you're able to grt your surgeries hun.

I think it's sometimes better to talk about this to other trans people who also experience dysphoria because usually in non trans spaces there's a lot of misunderstanding and invalidation that can be more hurtful than not. As if we don't know what we're talking about, not informed, or telling us it's not real in some capacity. If you or anyone else that is trans or questioning and you just want someone to talk to without the fear of judgment or emotional labor please DM me ^~^. I may not have the answers for you, but I can surely be an ear to talk to. This doesn't only have to be trans centered Btw. Just talking to others like you about anything is comforting too ^~^. Take care hun!

 

[Frauw]

Only you know what's best for you and what would make you feel most comfortable, we are all just meat suits at the end of the day. I would agree that most cis people would not understand, I never understood why people care so much about what others do with themselves and their own bodies.

 

[Nymph]

What if you feel the same or even worse after the surgery? There were cases of people who did. I think that once a person starts modifying their body through surgery, it is hard to stop and the feeling of contentment with one's body is very fleeting.

Yeah I mean you can feel however you want but I do personally believe I'll feel better after the surgery. I have to wear binders everyday to achieve the look I want and they are very constrictive and uncomfortable. And I don't think this is an addictive surgery, I don't even have money for more surgeries. This is a surgery so I can look how I was supposed to look in the first place-like how I feel inside. It's not like enhancing my face and having a nose job, this is completely different-at least that's how I see it

Me! God with so much of my body. People who don't have dysphoria or anything about being not cis/heteronormative would have a very hard time understanding if at all. It's legit torture. I hope you're able to grt your surgeries hun.

I think it's sometimes better to talk about this to other trans people who also experience dysphoria because usually in non trans spaces there's a lot of misunderstanding and invalidation that can be more hurtful than not. As if we don't know what we're talking about, not informed, or telling us it's not real in some capacity. If you or anyone else that is trans or questioning and you just want someone to talk to without the fear of judgment or emotional labor please DM me ^~^. I may not have the answers for you, but I can surely be an ear to talk to. This doesn't only have to be trans centered Btw. Just talking to others like you about anything is comforting too ^~^. Take care hun!

Thank you for offering to let me dm you, I really appreciate that. I'm on some subreddits for trans and non binary people and stuff but in real life it's very difficult because my parents don't understand it very well. I'm going to start going to a psychologist soon instead of just going to a psychiatrist and later next year I might go to a sexuologist (idk what the name is in English) to talk about the dysphoria and that it's indeed real and not just my brain going crazy or whatever (that's what my mom used to think) so I hope that will help me but it's been pretty hard coping with it and yeah. I mean here I am on this site so:(

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

Yeah I mean you can feel however you want but I do personally believe I'll feel better after the surgery. I have to wear binders everyday to achieve the look I want and they are very constrictive and uncomfortable. And I don't think this is an addictive surgery, I don't even have money for more surgeries. This is a surgery so I can look how I was supposed to look in the first place-like how I feel inside. It's not like enhancing my face and having a nose job, this is completely different-at least that's how I see it

Thank you for offering to let me dm you, I really appreciate that. I'm on some subreddits for trans and non binary people and stuff but in real life it's very difficult because my parents don't understand it very well. I'm going to start going to a psychologist soon instead of just going to a psychiatrist and later next year I might go to a sexuologist (idk what the name is in English) to talk about the dysphoria and that it's indeed real and not just my brain going crazy or whatever (that's what my mom used to think) so I hope that will help me but it's been pretty hard coping with it and yeah. I mean here I am on this site so:(

Whatever. Your body, your life.

 

[NightmareTour]

Whatever. Your body, your life.

A recent study found that people who detransitioners only make up about 0.5% of all people who transition medically. Of that tiny percentage, about 90% of those who do detransition do so because of pressure from family, work or other sources, not because they regret the decision.

If this is something that someone has been considering for years and their family is supportive, it's EXTREMELY unlikely that they'll regret it. Roughly a 0.05% chance kind of unlikely.

 

[Lupgevif]

There is regret after any kind of aesthetic surgery. That's why transition is a long process, in which the patient is evaluated several times, both physically and mentally (depending of the country and its legislations, of course). And I don't think mastectomy is that extreme of a body change, even cisgender women go through is, it's more about comfort and quality of life than anything else.

 

[NightmareTour]

There is regret after any kind of aesthetic surgery. That's why transition is a long process, in which the patient is evaluated several times, both physically and mentally (depending of the country and its legislations, of course). And I don't think mastectomy is that extreme of a body change, even cisgender women go through is, it's more about comfort and quality of life than anything else.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that feeling of "Oh shit, this is real and permanent now. What if I've done the wrong thing?" comes after any surgery that changes your appearance. It generally goes away though. Regret from the pain and difficulty of recovery is normal too, but that goes away as well. I'm not gonna lie, it's a painful and uncomfortable thing to heal from, but the overall benefit to your mental health, body image and overall quality of life is more than worth it in the long run.

 

[succor]

I experience dysphoria and have parents that don't understand very well (conservative and transphobic dad, immigrant mom with limited understanding of these sorts of things though she kind of tries). If you need someone to talk to my DMs are always open, friend.

 

[Caspers]

Dysphoria isn't the same as gender dysphoria. Dysphoria is a mental illness, an unease or dissatisfaction in life. It's horrible to have. For a second I thought maybe someone understands me I'll put a link about it; What is dysphoria

 

[k75]

I don't have gender dysphoria, but I can relate to being trapped in a body that is just wrong.

I feel like I have to say something, because this doesn't get talked about very much and the info isn't usually just given by surgeons if you don't know to ask... If you're going to have a mastectomy, please be sure you understand all that that means, what you'll go through, but most importantly, what it'll be like and feel like after. You need that knowledge to really decide if it's worth it, because it's permanent. There can be side effects, and if it goes bad, they're devastating.

And I don't think mastectomy is that extreme of a body change, even cisgender women go through is, it's more about comfort and quality of life than anything else.

I guess for some, it's not. I don't understand why. For others... It changes everything. But it wasn't my choice and left me mutilated, so I guess that makes a difference. All I know is it's fucking killing me. I can't live with this anymore.

 

[Frauw]

I don't have gender dysphoria, but I can relate to being trapped in a body that is just wrong.

I feel like I have to say something, because this doesn't get talked about very much and the info isn't usually just given by surgeons if you don't know to ask... If you're going to have a mastectomy, please be sure you understand all that that means, what you'll go through, but most importantly, what it'll be like and feel like after. You need that knowledge to really decide if it's worth it, because it's permanent. There can be side effects, and if it goes bad, they're devastating.



I guess for some, it's not. I don't understand why. For others... It changes everything. But it wasn't my choice and left me mutilated, so I guess that makes a difference. All I know is it's fucking killing me. I can't live with this anymore.

Would it be wrong to assume you had a botched mastectomy? Just curious.

 

[k75]

Would it be wrong to assume you had a botched mastectomy? Just curious.

I did. I had cancer. If I'd known the quality of life I'd have after, I would have just walked away. I'd give anything to undo it, even though I'd die.

 

[Frauw]

I did. I had cancer. If I'd known the quality of life I'd have after, I would have just walked away. I'd give anything to undo it, even though I'd die.

That feeling you feel is probably what somebody with gender dysphoria would feel, it sucks that some people have to dice roll on surgeries. I'm going to have some tests done for cancer this week and I'm quite anxious about it.

 

[k75]

That feeling you feel is probably what somebody with gender dysphoria would feel, it sucks that some people have to dice roll on surgeries. I'm going to have some tests done for cancer this week and I'm quite anxious about it.

I'm so sorry. I hope it turns out to be not as bad.

I think you might be right. There's definitely an aspect of that feeling, anyway. I hate that it's happiness vs a gamble. Nobody should have to go through that kind of thing.

 

[Lupgevif]

I guess for some, it's not. I don't understand why. For others... It changes everything. But it wasn't my choice and left me mutilated, so I guess that makes a difference. All I know is it's fucking killing me. I can't live with this anymore.

I completely disregarded people who had cancer and that was a grave mistake of mine. I am really sorry.

 

[Deleted member 20852]

I can't get surgery. It's one of my reasons my ctb although not the only reason. I would have really liked NB top surgery, I've thought about it for years. I feel really trapped in this body that isn't of my choosing.
I really hope you are able to get your surgery.

 

[succor]

I can't get surgery. It's one of my reasons my ctb although not the only reason. I would have really liked NB top surgery, I've thought about it for years. I feel really trapped in this body that isn't of my choosing.
I really hope you are able to get your surgery.

I also can't get surgery for medical reasons and it makes me desire to CTB much stronger.

 

[Niftypoint124]

Dysphoria isn't the same as gender dysphoria. Dysphoria is a mental illness, an unease or dissatisfaction in life. It's horrible to have. For a second I thought maybe someone understands me I'll put a link about it; What is dysphoria

Important to clarify that dysphoria is a symptom, not a diagnosis.

 

[k75]

I completely disregarded people who had cancer and that was a grave mistake of mine. I am really sorry.

Please don't feel bad. That wasn't my intention at all. From what I can tell, I might be in a minority with how I feel about the whole thing.

I really just think it's important that people be informed before deciding to take that step, and the medical professionals do a shitty job telling people there are risks. It seems like a kind of minor thing, but it truly is an amputation.

But I also know for some people, it's worth the sacrifice to finally be in a body that aligns with the way they truly see themselves. It's just so complicated.

 

[Heart Shards]

No, but I'm an ally to trans people, really an ally to anyone just trying to live their lives.

 

[AllReturnsToNothing]

It's funny really. Most of my dysphoria stems from the way that society interprets me based on my appearance. I don't have much of an issue with my body (besides body hair, and voice). But because I know that I will never be accepted as a woman the same way that cis women are really doesn't help my suicidal tendencies. I'll never get to experience sapphic love the way that a cis woman can easily love each other knowing that they share the same struggles. I'm tainted and it has to be a part of my identity. I was never given a choice. I never asked for this life. I tried fighting it but I just can't go against it anymore. I can't go against anything anymore. I can't go against myself, against my family, against my society. I'm just so tired. I'm exhausted. I can't wait anymore for things to "get better". And yet I can't kill myself for some god-forsaken reason! Fancy that! I want to kill myself so badly and yet I can't just do the deed already! How pathetic. What a miserable hellish existence. And all the while all alone in the world. All alone! Already too far gone. I know too much! I just beg to be put down already and be free of this agony.

 

[ScaredGirl]

I've been dealing with this for a long time but I recently shared this with my mom, at first she was very against it but after a while she let the idea into her mind and she said she will consider paying for my mastectomy after she talks to it about my dad and stuff. I really hope it works out and honestly just the fact she said she will consider is has helped me a lot but there's still a lot of times I feel hopeless because I don't know how far in the future is will become reality and I don't know how long I can take it here in this fucked up world, with a bunch of mental health issues and this body. Anyone else here dealing with the same problems? Is it one of your reasons for ctb? (Not being accepted, can't get surgery/hormones.....)
View attachment 50720

my dysphoria is why i bought SN 2 years on HRT, 4 years on voice therapy, came out at 12 family didnt like that so they were abusive, only got HRT at 19 and I dont have a job or any income to get any surgeries, the trans community is horrible if you have sex truama or if you dont have the privellege of being genetially perfect for HRT results. its the biggest bane of my life