Discussion Anyone feel like being a member on this forum might make CTB more difficult?

[OzymandiAsh]

I'm not knocking the forum btw, I still think it's a great place with great people.

I do feel like being here sometimes takes the wind out of the impulse to CTB though, even though the forum is also full of useful info which has stopped me from making attempts that would probably fail. I also have a wish to describe my CTB method here in full detail, in order to help anyone here who is also as desperate, or suffering as much as I am... I want to be successful with a method in order to vouch for its success.

Also this forum seems to me like a good place for recovery, rather than strictly CTB. I wish I was a member here when I was still interested in recovery (I'm not any more really).
I do wonder if there's something about being here that detracts from the sense of isolation and solitude I might need to finally CTB, sometimes.

There's a sense of security here that I never expected to have. I might end up having to distance myself from the forum a little bit to successfully CTB, although I hope I won't have to.

 

[BillyBob]

It is more of a coin toss. Depending on how far someone has gone down the rabbit hole of suffering and despair.
For many it is one of the final places that they can fully express them self without either getting locked in a psych ward or a knock on the door from the police.
Forum members here are caring and well more informed and knowledgeable on how to deal with issues compared to so called trained doctors and the sort.
In the end it comes down to personal choice, but some will stay here because they have a sense of connection with people, unlike the real world where you are tossed to the side like trash for just the mention of a mental health issue.

 

[persepexa]

What I like about this forum is that you can just be honest. There is no fakeness. Nobody is giving people false hope of recovery. No unrealistic expectations. Just honest communication and information.

 

[ShadowedChaos]

Amazing question and I'm sure a lot of people will go either way and have great arguements for each but it's definitely mixed. Each person's relation with the site will be different since everyone comes to it for different reasons, at different points, and gets what they each need from it differently.

 

[Dejected 55]

There is some good method information to be found here... but I feel no less lonely here than anywhere else, and some days being on here just frustrates me more. I have toyed with the idea of stopping coming here, but I don't want to miss good method information since I don't currently have one in plan and I need one.

 

[hell toupee]

I'm not knocking the forum btw, I still think it's a great place with great people.

I do feel like being here sometimes takes the wind out of the impulse to CTB though, even though the forum is also full of useful info which has stopped me from making attempts that would probably fail. I also have a wish to describe my CTB method here in full detail, in order to help anyone here who is also as desperate, or suffering as much as I am... I want to be successful with a method in order to vouch for its success.

Also this forum seems to me like a good place for recovery, rather than strictly CTB. I wish I was a member here when I was still interested in recovery (I'm not any more really).
I do wonder if there's something about being here that detracts from the sense of isolation and solitude I might need to finally CTB, sometimes.

There's a sense of security here that I never expected to have. I might end up having to distance myself from the forum a little bit to successfully CTB, although I hope I won't have to.

That's actually a good thing.

Anyone who 100% is determined to ctb, and have made up their minds, is going to ctb.

If the forum, or anything else, makes you question ctb, then you absolutely should hold off and reconsider.

If you have any doubts that you want to ctb, then do not do it. CTB should always be the very last resort, as it's a huge decision that is irreversible.

CTB should only be the choice when you are 100% certain, without question, that this is what's best for you.

 

[ToANewWorld]

I think it depends just how screwed you are. To me, being here or not makes zero difference.

 

[InevitableDeath]

nope. just another distraction. like a crappy film

 

[OzymandiAsh]

That's actually a good thing.

Anyone who 100% is determined to ctb, and have made up their minds, is going to ctb.

If the forum, or anything else, makes you question ctb, then you absolutely should hold off and reconsider.

If you have any doubts that you want to ctb, then do not do it. CTB should always be the very last resort, as it's a huge decision that is irreversible.

CTB should only be the choice when you are 100% certain, without question, that this is what's best for you.

I am 100% going to CTB, even if I have to jump in front of a train or something. I'm just talking about the failures of attempts in practice. For example I saw ligature strangulation on the forum and it seemed ideal, so I thought I'd give it a go, but very difficult in practice, didn't even achieve unconsciousness.

 

[hell toupee]

I am 100% going to CTB, even if I have to jump in front of a train or something. I'm just talking about the failures of attempts in practice. For example I saw ligature strangulation on the forum and it seemed ideal, so I thought I'd give it a go, but very difficult in practice, didn't even achieve unconsciousness.

Agreed - sorry I misunderstood you there a little bit.

When I first joined this forum, after reading for awhile I quickly realized that ctb is not that easy. Rather than discourage me, it depressed me because I became somewhat convinced that there was nothing I could do that would give me a reliable and painless way to ctb.

Fast
Painless
Reliable

Other than a few exceptions, any method you choose will conform to 2 of the above attributes, and no more than 2.

However, that said, we should keep in mind that we aren't really getting the complete picture here because naturally most all of the posts here are of people who have failed - successes obviously can't come back and let us know. It also doesn't account for the lurkers who may be reading these forums and using that info to ctb.

It was only after I put in a significant amount of time in to reading the mega threads in the resource section that I stumbled across a few rabbit holes I went down, most notably in the hanging thread where someone posted the KRA Cuff study from WW2 which involved subjecting volunteers to an inflatable cuff device that instantly occluded their carotid arteries and every single one of several volunteers lost consciousness within 15 seconds max. Of course the pressure was released not long after, but had the air bladders not been deflated, you obviously know what the result would be. This then led me down a long path of making my own cuff with a few simple parts from Amazon.

I also then stumbled into the idea that nitrous oxide also provides for a painless way to CTB, so I have combined both (inflatable cuff device + sealed bag filled with N2O over my head). Either method is viable - I just worry a little too much about the possibility of failure and want a 100% one and done.

The problem with ligature/night night/hanging is in order to compress the carotids you are placing pressure around the entire neck, which includes the airway and that can be considerably painful.

 

[OzymandiAsh]

Agreed - sorry I misunderstood you there a little bit.

When I first joined this forum, after reading for awhile I quickly realized that ctb is not that easy. Rather than discourage me, it depressed me because I became somewhat convinced that there was nothing I could do that would give me a reliable and painless way to ctb.

Fast
Painless
Reliable

Other than a few exceptions, any method you choose will conform to 2 of the above attributes, and no more than 2.

However, that said, we should keep in mind that we aren't really getting the complete picture here because naturally most all of the posts here are of people who have failed - successes obviously can't come back and let us know. It also doesn't account for the lurkers who may be reading these forums and using that info to ctb.

Agreed

It was only after I put in a significant amount of time in to reading the mega threads in the resource section that I stumbled across a few rabbit holes I went down, most notably in the hanging thread where someone posted the KRA Cuff study from WW2 which involved subjecting volunteers to an inflatable cuff device that instantly occluded their carotid arteries and every single one of several volunteers lost consciousness within 15 seconds max. Of course the pressure was released not long after, but had the air bladders not been deflated, you obviously know what the result would be. This then led me down a long path of making my own cuff with a few simple parts from Amazon.

I also then stumbled into the idea that nitrous oxide also provides for a painless way to CTB, so I have combined both (inflatable cuff device + sealed bag filled with N2O over my head). Either method is viable - I just worry a little too much about the possibility of failure and want a 100% one and done.

The problem with ligature/night night/hanging is in order to compress the carotids you are placing pressure around the entire neck, which includes the airway and that can be considerably painful.

Interesting. I envy the time and dedication you have put into this. Doesn't the cuff also compress the entire neck?

Do you ever intend to write a guide btw, and when are you planning to CTB?

 

[hell toupee]

Interesting. I envy the time and dedication you have put into this. Doesn't the cuff also compress the entire neck?

Do you ever intend to write a guide btw, and when are you planning to CTB?

Well, I only put in that time (mostly working out all of the variables and developing a protocol) because anything else leaves my mind to go in circles about my problems/future/etc. So it kept me distracted. And for sure, I didn't do it alone - I worked on this with a few other members here.

The cuff device, if you want to call it that, does not wrap around the entire neck, no. People have posted about using something like a blood pressure cuff, but that won't work because again, it wraps around the entire neck.

Instead, we are simply using air shims/wedges - 1 for each side of the neck. A ratchet strap then holds them in place and insures the shims don't take the path of least resistance once inflated, ie. away from the neck. It's basically the night night method except in night night the ratchet strap is providing all of the force, which includes the airway. Here, the shims are providing the necessary force, and it's only targeting the carotids/jugulars.

I did write up a guide, and upon 2nd thought had the mods remove it. I'm all for everyone's right to do what they feel is best for themselves, as I only walk in my own shoes and nobody else's. However, I also realize there are people on this forum who are young and impulsive. As we get older, we realize that some things that felt so world ending at the time, really turns out to be not that big of a deal. I think I had seen someone make a post like "i need a way to ctb quickly before my parents get home and find out I have a boyfriend/girlfriend/got bad grades/am gay/etc." Something like that.

But another side of me is torn, because I know if someone had a method or info on how to painlessly ctb, I would give anything for that.

I keep saying this and pushing back on it - I'm ready to ctb anytime and actually look forward to it as it is my own personal belief that death is just a doorway, not an ending. That said, this is going to devastate my mother, and I keep holding off because of that. However, I had decided I was going to ctb after my wife died, which was a year and a half ago, and since them I've been neglecting all kinds of things knowing I'd be gone. Now those things are catching up to me so I'm truly getting boxed in. I don't like setting a date because that seems to bring about some anxiety, so I've decided to check out when I get the urge to just go for it. More than likely very soon.

 

[Lemonite]

I´m long time lurker, i would say it makes it easier or harder, But it doesnt leave it at same. If u want to ctb, it helps you realize and do it, and if you don´t really want u come to see truth

 

[Zaphkiel]

It makes you relativize how other's situation can be a lot shittier than yours and somehow you think it's cool to try again.
Then you relaps
I have a good situation (really) but my days are just bland, nothing to love and nothing to love me
the loneliness is what killing me but i have a nice appartment with a nice view and a cat. No family or close friends.
Now that i thinik about it, that's all i have but it's still better than a olot here