Venting Anyone feel especially depressed

[WorthlessTrash]

Anyone feel even more depressed, hopeless and just resentful when they see someone who has what they lack (the result of their depression) or someone who is suddenly able to recover from their problems? Been seeing quite a few people who have what I wish I had, or are able to recover especially in the sasu chat and it depresses me further and makes me feel hopeless and useless.

Maybe I am just a shit person.

 

[bed]

No, I feel happy for them that they have managed to recover or at least feel slightly better. Their well-being has nothing to do with my mental/physical health so I feel no malice toward them.

 

[Venus13]

I used to for sure when I had more life in me. Not anymore, I'm too far removed from life. I'm glad when others aren't suffering.

When people recover it's the best sight in the world. This purgatory phase before suicide is in the category of I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy,

 

[Forever Sleep]

No- I don't think you're a shit person. I just think you're human... I expect a part of you feels happy for them while another part of you feels envious.

I tend to avoid social media like Facebook but I am on Linkedin. It's sometimes useful for job hunting. I feel tremendous envy when I see former work colleagues with these amazing jobs. Not to say they don't deserve them... They are tremendously talented.

I guess I sometimes wonder if part of it is confidence though. Plus, they have proably been more sensible and have less ties- so are able to travel all over the country for work. And, they've made the effort to learn to drive and constantly go after work in the first place. All important for my kind of work. I know very well that they've only accomplished what they have through tremendous effort- so- really- I don't have the right to compare or complain...

I guess I do feel hampered by a massive lack of confidence and social anxiety. Still- talking to people- it seems most have their own 'demons' to fight.

I don't know- it all just seems like SO much effort and I'm SO tired of fighting. I just want it to be over. I'm in a really low patch at the moment too. I sympathise with you. ❤

 

[WorthlessTrash]

No, I feel happy for them that they have managed to recover or at least feel slightly better. Their well-being has nothing to do with my mental/physical health so I feel no malice toward them.

It's not about malice towards them for me, it's just feeling hopeless and malice towards myself.

 

[LastFlowers]

Anyone feel even more depressed, hopeless and just resentful when they see someone who has what they lack (the result of their depression) or someone who is suddenly able to recover from their problems? Been seeing quite a few people who have what I wish I had, or are able to recover especially in the sasu chat and it depresses me further and makes me feel hopeless and useless.

Maybe I am just a shit person.

Many people do, it's only natural (and understandable), don't let other disingenuous virtue signaling imply otherwise.
You are not a shit person.

To want the best for yourself and to feel sorrow/despair/anger when witnessing that very thing (or things) fall into another person's lap is simply the desire for justness and fairness and all of the opportunities & relief you deserve to have, same as others.
It's the same reason why a starving person's starvation is emphasized when they see food fall into a mouth other than their own.
It's torture compounding torment.

 

[bed]

It's not about malice towards them for me, it's just feeling hopeless and malice towards myself.

sorry was considering editing my post after I sent it, didn't mean you held malice towards them. I'm sorry you feel hopeless and it makes you feel worse about yourself when people have improved their life/accepted their situation. I try not to compare myself to others because it generally just makes me feel worse because I'm generally very far behind the norm for my age and haven't experienced as many things as I would have liked. Life isn't linear progress though so at least there's that.

 

[Cathy Ames]

Anyone feel even more depressed, hopeless and just resentful when they see someone who has what they lack (the result of their depression) or someone who is suddenly able to recover from their problems? Been seeing quite a few people who have what I wish I had, or are able to recover especially in the sasu chat and it depresses me further and makes me feel hopeless and useless.

Maybe I am just a shit person.

I don't think feeling this makes you (or anyone else) a shit person.

 

[Doom]

It's not fair that some people have everything and others have nothing. I get really angry. I hate being around successful ppl who are living my dreams while i cant. Isnt everyone like that, when so much injustice happens to them? I dont think that makes you any worse than any other human on this planet.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Feelings, as passive experiences, can't make you a bad person because they come up of their own accord. It's understandable to feel this way you've described; I certainly can relate. What's more important is our actions. To unfairly take out resentment, envy, etc. on others who would make you a bad person. But that's not what you're talking about.

To be honest I do have a bit of a dislike, fair or unfair, for the "I'm good, bye SS" posts that are occasionally written here. Especially if they also say something like "you can do it too!!!<3". But that's my problem and I'm not trying to dictate what's kosher to post and what's not.