Anyone else changed their mind about helium suicide?

[JigsawFeelin]

It's really odd,
So when my life collapsed in on itself back in October of last year, I bought all the ingredients for a helium suicide (but with cpap mask rather than bag)
I was given a kitten, a few people did the whole 'no look at your degree and your beauty etc' thing and I decided not to immediately use it.
I'd say it's hesitation but it's not...it's just not... my method anymore.
My friend theorises I just want 'an option' but I don't believe in it anymore. I don't believe if I hooked myself up to it right this second, I would die. Brain damage, definitely. But not death. So it has become a weird fixture in my room. I put a blanket over it, put it in the corner and it's now a morbid little fact for hook-ups or friends. 'You'll never guess what that's for?'
I spent around £150 on the set-up yet can't bring myself to use it.

A few months ago my friend put on the mask when I was in the bathroom as a kinda sick joke (he was very high) and I then leapt on my excuse for not using it - he'd broken it.
Never mind he's not got a huge head, and I checked the mask over and it's fine- he's broken it.

I then decided to actively seek out a suicide community, as I have been trying for 8 months and I'm not getting any younger and I see...nothing about helium. Nothing at all. Nada. When for a time it was 'the method'
What's changed? Is there new info out there? Is there a reason why my little death machine is giving me negative vibes?

 

[SpottedPanda]

There's plenty of info here about helium.

I long since abandoned it as a method for me, after buying multiple tanks. I don't feel I could ever go back to it.

 

[JigsawFeelin]

There's plenty of info here about helium.

I long since abandoned it as a method for me, after buying multiple tanks. I don't feel I could ever go back to it.

Thanks for your reply.
If you don't mind my asking, what is it that's 'put you off'?

 

[SpottedPanda]

Thanks for your reply.
If you don't mind my asking, what is it that's 'put you off'?

I put together a half assed setup, fully intending to go through with it.

But I got a feeling of shock in my solar plexus when I went to put my head in.

I need something where it feels like I'm practising, but that can lead to death in the process.

 

[WearyOfStruggling]

It's really odd,
So when my life collapsed in on itself back in October of last year, I bought all the ingredients for a helium suicide (but with cpap mask rather than bag)
I was given a kitten, a few people did the whole 'no look at your degree and your beauty etc' thing and I decided not to immediately use it.
I'd say it's hesitation but it's not...it's just not... my method anymore.
My friend theorises I just want 'an option' but I don't believe in it anymore. I don't believe if I hooked myself up to it right this second, I would die. Brain damage, definitely. But not death. So it has become a weird fixture in my room. I put a blanket over it, put it in the corner and it's now a morbid little fact for hook-ups or friends. 'You'll never guess what that's for?'
I spent around £150 on the set-up yet can't bring myself to use it.

A few months ago my friend put on the mask when I was in the bathroom as a kinda sick joke (he was very high) and I then leapt on my excuse for not using it - he'd broken it.
Never mind he's not got a huge head, and I checked the mask over and it's fine- he's broken it.

I then decided to actively seek out a suicide community, as I have been trying for 8 months and I'm not getting any younger and I see...nothing about helium. Nothing at all. Nada. When for a time it was 'the method'
What's changed? Is there new info out there? Is there a reason why my little death machine is giving me negative vibes?

No, of the methods available to me that I have learned about in the last few weeks, inert gas is by far the most reliable, gentle and painless way. Most other methods I don't think I could do the technique correctly, or obtain the necessary drugs.

Why did you plan to use a CPAP mask? I feel much more confident with the exit bag that has been used successfully so much in the past.

 

[JigsawFeelin]

No, of the methods available to me that I have learned about in the last few weeks, inert gas is by far the most reliable, gentle and painless way. Most other methods I don't think I could do the technique correctly, or obtain the necessary drugs.

Why did you plan to use a CPAP mask? I feel much more confident with the exit bag that has been used successfully so much in the past.

I don't trust myself to make the bag airtight.
I'm a bit of an idiot, quite honestly