ClownMe

ClownMe

Don't Cry for Me, I'm Already Dead
Apr 7, 2021
20,561
Anyone else on here a control freak who doesn't have control in any aspects of their life?

I am one and it frustrates me to no end. I want every aspect of my life to be in my control, but ironically the only aspect of my life that is in my control at this present moment is my ability to end my life. In every other aspect i am powerless and i dont see it changing anytime soon.

Im sick of my family messing up the house and not cleaning up after themselves, im sick of my narcassistic mother bullying me, im sick of being broke and having to live in a broken home in which im not loved and may never be able to move out from, im sick of working a dead end, low paying job with no prospect of career advancement where everyone treats me like shit, im sick of not having any friends or a girlfriend because im socially awkward, im sick of never being given respect, the list goes on and on and on....

Im sorry for this rant but im just over it, it does my head in.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
I think I understand what you mean.
I've kinda given up on controlling stuff because the more I try to control things, the bigger mess my life becomes lol.
 
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noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,965
I am a control freak too. In addition to my other numerous illnesses.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,049
I can relate. That is why I think about ctb a lot as well, it brings me a feeling of peace knowing I can regain control over a life I didn't ask for. I have always had the personality where I have wanted things to be an certain way and I would always get frustrated if this didn't happen. I have quite obsessive tendencies too.
 
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demuic

demuic

Life was a mistake
Sep 12, 2020
1,383
Anyone else on here a control freak who doesn't have control in any aspects of their life?

I am one and it frustrates me to no end. I want every aspect of my life to be in my control, but ironically the only aspect of my life that is in my control at this present moment is my ability to end my life. In every other aspect i am powerless and i dont see it changing anytime soon.

Im sick of my family messing up the house and not cleaning up after themselves, im sick of my narcassistic mother bullying me, im sick of being broke and having to live in a broken home in which im not loved and may never be able to move out from, im sick of working a dead end, low paying job with no prospect of career advancement where everyone treats me like shit, im sick of not having any friends or a girlfriend because im socially awkward, im sick of never being given respect, the list goes on and on and on....

Im sorry for this rant but im just over it, it does my head in.
Yes, I always hated the fact that I don't have control over my life. Anything that you do in society has be dictated by others. You're depending on the whims of the government, corporations, random people you come across, all their rules and regulations, and not to mention biology and family for 18+ years of your life. You have to depend on the good will of others not to be evil and corrupt and it's clear most people can't even even that much.

I can't accept things that don't make sense, I hate this world, there's no freedom.

I can relate. That is why I think about ctb a lot as well, it brings me a feeling of peace knowing I can regain control over a life I didn't ask for. I have always had the personality where I have wanted things to be an certain way and I would always get frustrated if this didn't happen. I have quite obsessive tendencies too.
Same.
 
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Superdeterminist

Superdeterminist

Enlightened
Apr 5, 2020
1,877
This is exactly the cruelty of the universe. It generates feeling, experiencing beings with dreams and wills of their own, and has absolutely no issue shattering those dreams and squashing those beings. It gives them just enough intelligence to comprehend their doomed situation, but not nearly enough to actually overcome it. It taunts them by continually eluding complete understanding, never allowing perfect knowledge and so forbidding a perfect existence.
 
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