Anyone dealing with paranoia?

[suffering]

I've always been a little paranoid, probably due to my childhood, but lately the symptoms seem to intensify. I often feel like 'they are out to get me'. I don't usually care much about what others think, but in my paranoid fear this becomes a practical issue, as I fear I would become ostracized, persecuted, unemployable, etc. Basically I fear the practical (although unrealistic) side effects, more than the actual opinions of others, although I fear those as well.
I suppose some of my fears are justified, as people can be very shitty and the world is a madhouse, but I wish I would shift my mindset to a more pragmatic one. Basically: to stop worrying in advance, and deal with a problem if and only if it happens.
Anybody else feel the same?

 

[salvation]

yes...

 

[Exile]

Yep. Anticipation makes everything worse.

 

[alizee]

I don't suffer from paranoia so I can't really relate but maybe I can help. I'm into philosophy, physics, computer science and consider myself a scientist with the research work I help contribute towards. I've found what has helped me live a healthy life so far and under poor birth circumstances is understanding determinism. How free will is an illusion and we're just conditioned to think we have choice when it's not really the case. I'm seeking suicide in the near future because of being born a male (I'm transgender). Anyway I've posted a lot about how everything is fate on this forum a lot because the understanding helped me get so far in life and with being alright if I die by suicide. Also it helps with rationalizing what makes sense. Why a person thinks the way they do and why they will act a certain way. Your thoughts, decisions, and what we perceive as choices are all just factored from the preceding events in your life. Nobody has any control over anything because your birth was the only real starting point. Whatever making you paranoid is the outcome of genetics, behavioural & environmental factors learned from your surroundings and you can have a more stable mind when realizing this all.

 

[Final Escape]

Yes, it improved some off the Adderall but it's still there. It might also be anxiety more than paranoia. It's more like a fear of not being able to solve problems. I swear my ability to solve problems got worse on legal speed. Probably because I was sleep deprived.

 

[GeorgeJL]

I've always been a little paranoid, probably due to my childhood, but lately the symptoms seem to intensify. I often feel like 'they are out to get me'. I don't usually care much about what others think, but in my paranoid fear this becomes a practical issue, as I fear I would become ostracized, persecuted, unemployable, etc. Basically I fear the practical (although unrealistic) side effects, more than the actual opinions of others, although I fear those as well.
I suppose some of my fears are justified, as people can be very shitty and the world is a madhouse, but I wish I would shift my mindset to a more pragmatic one. Basically: to stop worrying in advance, and deal with a problem if and only if it happens.
Anybody else feel the same?

No I don't, in fact I can even smoke weed and not feel paranoid.

 

[Jodes]

I've always been a little paranoid, probably due to my childhood, but lately the symptoms seem to intensify. I often feel like 'they are out to get me'. I don't usually care much about what others think, but in my paranoid fear this becomes a practical issue, as I fear I would become ostracized, persecuted, unemployable, etc. Basically I fear the practical (although unrealistic) side effects, more than the actual opinions of others, although I fear those as well.
I suppose some of my fears are justified, as people can be very shitty and the world is a madhouse, but I wish I would shift my mindset to a more pragmatic one. Basically: to stop worrying in advance, and deal with a problem if and only if it happens.
Anybody else feel the same?

I wish I'd taken that approach a while ago, I might have been in a much better place now

Yes, it improved some off the Adderall but it's still there. It might also be anxiety more than paranoia. It's more like a fear of not being able to solve problems. I swear my ability to solve problems got worse on legal speed. Probably because I was sleep deprived.

You are suck a fucking troll

 

[Redt2go]

Yeah I started a delusions of persecution thread... I think everyone is out to get me... So paranoid I can't even tell what's reasonably suspicious at this point. I really fucking hate being fucked in the head. Going to stop with the weed. Maybe that'll help

 

[Jodes]

Yeah I started a delusions of persecution thread... I think everyone is out to get me... So paranoid I can't even tell what's reasonably suspicious at this point. I really fucking hate being fucked in the head. Going to stop with the weed. Maybe that'll help

Almost certainly would

 

[Ruffian]

"There is no such thing as paranoia. Your worst fears can come true at any moment." Quote by Hunter S. Thompson who was under surveillance by the FBI for years.
"Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not after you." Sung by Kurt Cobain but was around long before that. Both men ctb.

 

[suffering]

I'm sorry to spam this further, but I can't vent nowhere else and I need to let it out. My paranoia is increasing, some days to the point of despair. I am currently in the process of being interviewed for a job (too pussy to ctb, although I want to, so I have to pay the bills) and I am terrified of what they might find about me online, as I was quite vocal in the past about my misanthropy. I fear a confrontation with them probably more than I fear a simple rejection, which makes me pathetic and weak.
This paranoia however is kind of justified. My well being (salary) depends on not being found out. But there is also irrational paranoia, like if I see a car parked outside in a weird way, I am imagining "they are out to get me". I don't know who "they" would be. And although I am aware of the irrationality of my fear, I can't help feeling afraid.
Also fear of sickness. If I find something slightly wrong with my health, I start to imagine the worse.
Anyway, I hope everything will turn out ok.
I feel more relieved after typing this and I want to thank anyone who read this.

 

[netrezven]

I have high paranoia too. As i was younger i simply didn't trust people and their intentions. After an incident i wasn't able to predict back then, i decided that i have to predict all outcomes that i can in everything that i do. That was long ago. At some point I started to realize that this way of thinking wasn't "normal". I pass one terrible outcome, saying to myself not to think of the worst. It was literally fatal. So from that moment i never say to myself "don't think it" anymore.
I'm living with my paranoia from so long, i'm used to it. I usually don't show it to anybody. Now it's like a web of so many outcomes, plans, back-up plans. Everything that anyone may say or do is stored in my head. I have no idea witch variant is true or will it happen - but i have a very real idea on what to do if something happens. If i don't know if something happened or not - i act like it has happened (if there is any chance that passing it may harm me).
It really sounds like i'm crazy, but a friend of mine likes to quote Mario Puzo's God Father: "Men can't afford to be careless. Only women and children can."
I'm fine when it come to business.
But when my paranoia hits my personal life - usually it's truth and drives me insane, because there is no outcome in witch i can simply act as the worst has happened. Those are big downsides, but i really can't go "all in" with people anymore.

 

[suffering]

Will vent here further, I am desperate to feel like I have a place where I can let it all out. This is such a good therapy for me.
The silence of my possible employers is killing me. The uncertainty hurts a lot, I will have to e-mail them today to get an update. I an already imagine them calling me crazy, mentally unstable, a menace to society ( because I publicly stated that not existing is better than existing, which is actually a very sane and compassionate philosophical statement, although I was occasionally very edgy about it, I have to admit). I imagine them wondering how on earth did I manage to fool them during the interview, with them now thinking that I am a psycho, a lunatic, a monster.
And while the silence persists and my future remains uncertain, my money slowly drains away, day by day, as my unemployed ass has to buy the necessary things in life. (not complaining to much though, I'm still having a little bit of savings, so at least I have that going).
Thanks again to anyone reading this.
I will update here once I have the answer.

 

[Memento Mori]

i think you wouldnt realize true paranoia because it would be nothing else than reality for you, you wouldnt really see yourself as paranoid. same like with most psychosis(es? plural). try meth, thats a whole new level of paranoia

i was "extremely" paranoid back in my teens, am not gonna go into detail lol. now i'm rather phobic but i really need my fucking safe space, it's annoying to deal with people like family at home or people outside, EVERYWHERE. MASS ORGIES TO PRODUCE EVEN MORE HUMANS UNTIL YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIA

 

[vaulthunter]

diagnosed ppd, and haaaate it. i'm paranoid about everything and i mean everything. due to childhood trauma, its extremely bad at home and at night, and i have to check all my windows and doors a few times before i sleep out of this feeling of fear, and even then i only sleep about 4 hours, fearing someone is after me. so hard

 

[MistakesHappen]

I've always been a little paranoid, probably due to my childhood, but lately the symptoms seem to intensify. I often feel like 'they are out to get me'. I don't usually care much about what others think, but in my paranoid fear this becomes a practical issue, as I fear I would become ostracized, persecuted, unemployable, etc. Basically I fear the practical (although unrealistic) side effects, more than the actual opinions of others, although I fear those as well.
I suppose some of my fears are justified, as people can be very shitty and the world is a madhouse, but I wish I would shift my mindset to a more pragmatic one. Basically: to stop worrying in advance, and deal with a problem if and only if it happens.
Anybody else feel the same?

I feel you.

 

[suffering]

I feel you.

I selfishly enjoy knowing that someone understands, but I am sorry you are going through similar things. Paranoia can be terrible.

diagnosed ppd, and haaaate it. i'm paranoid about everything and i mean everything. due to childhood trauma, its extremely bad at home and at night, and i have to check all my windows and doors a few times before i sleep out of this feeling of fear, and even then i only sleep about 4 hours, fearing someone is after me. so hard

I also check multiple times. I sometimes sleep with a knife near the bed, it helps to know I have it there. You might try to have some knife or other weapon nearby as well.

 

[suffering]

Update to my initial posts about me worrying that my possible employers will find out about the highly misanthropic remarks I posted online in the past: looks like I got the job! Not sure I should rejoice about being a wage slave again, but at least I won't be homeless. My paranoia will probably remain, as there is always the risk that I get fired. Nonetheless, it's a little victory, I suppose. If I get fired, I'll come here to vent.

 

[weargon]

I know this is a serious discussion but I couldn't help but remember this funny video about paranoid schizophrenics done by the onion, that I just can't resist sharing.



I used to be more paranoid when I was really into conspiracy theories as a teenager. I got really carried away with reading about every stupid thing out there. Over the years, having caught on to some people's lies and whatnot I started growing more accustomed to human beings nature of being bullshitters and turned into a hardened skeptic of everything. When I realized the whole planet is headless blunder operating under the illusion of a master plan, it made any thoughts of paranoia disappear.

 

[Quinlor]

Why you asking, do you know something?

 

[suffering]

I know this is a serious discussion but I couldn't help but remember this funny video about paranoid schizophrenics done by the onion, that I just can't resist sharing.



I used to be more paranoid when I was really into conspiracy theories as a teenager. I got really carried away with reading about every stupid thing out there. Over the years, having caught on to some people's lies and whatnot I started growing more accustomed to human beings nature of being bullshitters and turned into a hardened skeptic of everything. When I realized the whole planet is headless blunder operating under the illusion of a master plan, it made any thoughts of paranoia disappear.

Why you asking, do you know something?

Guys, I haven't laughed so hard in quite a while! Humor makes everything better, thank you for your posts

 

[weargon]

Haha yeah theonion is great, or was great, bummer they don't really produce any awesome videos like that on youtube any more. But it definitely helps with the mood during shitty days :). Here's another one of my favorites:

 

[Psychotic King]

The noises get me. Especially if I have taken weed or something similar. I dont use hard drugs but I get anxious about noises, especially if I think someone is at the door. I hate that feeling. Door bell especially, since I dont know who is there and I always expect a conflict of some sort for some reason.

I have some paranoia about my psyche, dont really trust it for to last to be honest. I occasionally see some lights on the side of my vision. I dont think it's a good thing but it's obviously still nothing like full blown psychosis or clear hallucinations, but still

 

[suffering]

Door bell especially, since I dont know who is there and I always expect a conflict of some sort for some reason.

Haha, I do that the same! If the phone rings, I always assume something terrible has happened and I'm in big trouble.
I have also started to give the middle finger to helicopters, just in case.

 

[VikingWinger]

I used to have a really bad weed-induced paranoia from age 19-23. Now I'm 24 and have been suicidal for about a year and just don't care enough to be paranoid anymore. It'll all be forgotten when I'm dead anyway.