Discussion Anybody else completely lost interest in music since ctb decision?

[falloutcarter13]

I often see people here talking about their fav music, using it to cope with the time before ctb or even what songs they're going to listen to while they do it. Its been the opposite for me...I simply have no desire to listen to anything at all anymore. Its not an emotional thing, doesn't make me sad...I just don't care. And I loved music before I made my decision. Random, but I also lost all interest in video games as well. I just spend all my time blowing up the shit out of SS, and talking to my one friend who knows all the details of whats going on with me and what I plan to do. Just wondering if anybody else has something similar going on, thanks! =)

 

[Life_and_Death]

lost interest BECAUSE of that.....no. but i do occasionally go through these moments where nothing is right. i dont want sit i dont want to stand i dont want to lay down, i dont want listen to music or but i do want to listen to music. i call it "i just dont want to" because i literally want to do nothing. but nothing is impossible so i just feel empty and uncomfortable until it passes

 

[socrates]

Same. I have barely listened to any music, podcasts, or played any video games. TBH I haven't done much of anything that makes me happy the last couple of days. I think it's the depression for me.

 

[falloutcarter13]

Same. I have barely listened to any music, podcasts, or played any video games. TBH I haven't done much of anything that makes me happy the last couple of days. I think it's the depression for me.

Yeah, that'll do it too. I dunno, I actually feel some joy and peace now that my mind is made up and all of the obstacles to ctb are behind me...its more like I don't think I want to feel like I'm wasting any of the time I have left. And I definitely don't want to be alone, I want to talk to people as much as possible (if I can be honest with them about what's coming for me anyway, like I can with my best friend and the people here)

 

[Mila]

Absolutely lost interest in everything!

 

[InevitablePattern91]

Yea. I lost interest in everything I used to like.

Music, movies, Netflix, social networks, games, time with friends, sex. I can't enjoy any of these things anymore.

The only things I'm doing in the last weeks are: access this forum and plan my ctb.

 

[Callisto]

I have lost all of my passion for music in the past few years. Up until then I was constantly buying new music and listening to music daily. Dysthymia has become a constant for me over the past decade, and I have lost my interest for all of the things I used to love. I no longer listen to music or have any interest in exploring new music on the net.

 

[esse_est_percipi]

I often see people here talking about their fav music, using it to cope with the time before ctb or even what songs they're going to listen to while they do it. Its been the opposite for me...I simply have no desire to listen to anything at all anymore. Its not an emotional thing, doesn't make me sad...I just don't care. And I loved music before I made my decision. Random, but I also lost all interest in video games as well. I just spend all my time blowing up the shit out of SS, and talking to my one friend who knows all the details of whats going on with me and what I plan to do. Just wondering if anybody else has something similar going on, thanks! =)

Exact same here. I haven't gone out of my way to listen to music for months. Except with me I think it's more an emotional thing/due to depression, and not wanting to feel worse by having sad emotions brought up.
But there is also an element of just not caring anymore, like I'm done with all this and my mind is just slowly phasing out of this particular frequency of existence.

 

[W3akCr3atur3]

Music is one of my favorite things in life. It's one of the very few things that helped me keep going through the hard times.
However even now, when I am sure to ctb I still love it.
Extremely heavy and sad generes and songs helps me feel like I am not the only one who feel this way. And it helps me accept that not every story has a good ending, just like mine.

 

[TAW122]

I still listen to music even though I do plan to CTB in the future, either later this year (circumstance and time dependent) or at my earliest possible convenience. My decision has already been made, so it's not a matter of if, but when (depending on circumstances and time).

 

[Wayfaerer]

I've lost interest in everything unless I am under the influence of something.

 

[Dreamless Sleep]

Driving fast and listening to the beautiful roar of my hemi with Metallica up as loud as my ears can tolerate, is one of the few things that still makes me feel like I'm living and not just waiting to die.

 

[Linda]

Absolutely lost interest in everything!

That's not surprising in the circumstances. We're here for you, whenever you want us.

 

[snuff]

nope. i still listening to the same playlist for ctb. the things that i lost interest to is eating and watch something. barely eat this last 2 weeks and didn't watch anything too

 

[finalnap]

Yes and it's crazy to me. Music used to be a massive part of my personality like I'd listen for 6 or so hours a day and now I don't even listen to an hours worth. I just can't. And I feel like I don't deserve to find new music or listen to some old music because I can't relate and I'm not the same person.

 

[Dima2]

I used to listen to music literally all day long in good times and in bad times , after breaking up with my gf i just can't anymore,
It's like life lost colors...

 

[Sinai Silence]

I wouldn't say my interest in music has lessened but my drive to play, write and record has completely died out. I wish I could find some spark but it won't happen. Music has filled my life since I was very young I don't think I could live without it, especially with having tinnitus.

 

[Meditation guide]

I often see people here talking about their fav music, using it to cope with the time before ctb or even what songs they're going to listen to while they do it. Its been the opposite for me...I simply have no desire to listen to anything at all anymore. Its not an emotional thing, doesn't make me sad...I just don't care. And I loved music before I made my decision. Random, but I also lost all interest in video games as well. I just spend all my time blowing up the shit out of SS, and talking to my one friend who knows all the details of whats going on with me and what I plan to do. Just wondering if anybody else has something similar going on, thanks! =)

I've lost interest in just about everything aside from this. It's so hard to do the most basic things to take care of what I need to do. Everything is falling apart around me and I don't care.

 

[restingspot]

Not really. I usually search out really tranquil, New Age or meditational music to add to my ctb playlist when I get like that. I don't really listen to music unless I'm studying, taking public transit or just happen to come across it online.

 

[sadghost]

Yep, all media is not stimulating enough for me. Sometimes I will put on music and then immediately turn it off. Watching tv/movies feels like work to me. I mostly just use music (familiar songs) for background noise if silence isn't an option, it somewhat helps me to not overthink. Though at this point I am very disinterested in/indifferent to literally everything except CTB. I'm just done. I hate that I can't even be honest with my own friends about this who won't understand. It's always "try a new hobby/interest!" Like, with all due respect, no..

 

[Saint-mal]

Yeah honestly kinda sucks the because this is the last few times.i.can enjoy it but even my shitty middle school habit of fanfic is hardly entertaining. I just wanna be On SS and connect\learn more about my method so I don't fail.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I've never been very into music. I think the fact that I'm pretty antisocial contributes to this; you probably hear about a lot of music and talk about your love of it with people, and it doesn't seem to mean an awful lot when you hear it alone and out of context.

 

[Marktheghost]

I've lost interest in more or less everything too.

 

[lex]

Lost interest in pretty much everything including music. I originally wanted to CTB while listening to my favorite songs but I guess that's off the table now.

 

[Blueman]

I've lost interest in everything I until 3 months ago enjoyed, sport, reading, exercise, socializing.
Strangely I was never that much into music but have been reminiscing and listening to stuff from 60s and 70s I was born mid 60s

 

[artroom1931]

Same here...music used to be my world, but in the last month I've barely listened to it at all. For a while I felt my issue was "I don't want these songs to become associated with such an awful period in my life to me" before I'd officially planned on catching the bus, but now that I'm ready to it just feels like it'd break my heart to listen to anything.

 

[Lupgevif]

Yes, I stopped enjoying music. But not related with my desire/decision to ctb.

 

[Deleted member 18655]

Pretty much. Music was a big part of my life, too. I have a B.Mus.Ed. and was a music teacher in schools for a few years. In the past few months, I don't really care about music: it doesn't help or hinder my mood. I just breaks up the monotonous silence. But so can YouTube in the background.

 

[I screwed up]

Have lost interest in everything ... I used to love music and sport ( football ) but now nothing .... Everything just seems meaningless

 

[rt1989526]

Have lost interest in everything ... I used to love music and sport ( football ) but now nothing .... Everything just seems meaningless

Ditto. I can't even drink beers now, the medication has taken everything. It's complete anhedonia. And I need to end it.