Any experience with crisis lines? Really need some help

[Willow]

I am thinking about texting 988 but I'm really unsure. I am afraid they will call the police and take me to the hospital. I've been in the hospital before, it's horrible and it doesn't help.
I have a gun and am seriously considering going through with it but I'm afraid and would like to talk to somebody

 

[daruino]

Hey, I'm so sorry to hear this, you're probably high on emotions right now. I've had good experience with suicide crisis lines- but they will dissuade you from doing it. I want to say that if any part of you has any doubts then listen to those doubts and only make a definitive choice if you are 100% certain. You could also try anonymously calling with the hotline- I don't really know to what extent they are able to trace phones like that. But do whatever your comfortable with. I really wish you the best.

Edit: if it gives any clarity and you either decide to wait or go through with it- to prevent them from i guess sending the police you will have to lie and say that you aren't going to do anything,,

 

[Willow]

Thank you so much for replying. It means a lot to me. I really do have some doubts especially about how my husband would be affected

 

[daruino]

Thank you so much for replying. It means a lot to me. I really do have some doubts especially about how my husband would be affected

It's no problem- has there been any cause for you to want to ctb right now?

 

[Chronical_Suicidal]

I worked in a crisis line, and based on my experience, there's no chance someone calling the ambulance, police, etc. for you, unless you ask for it. But keep in mind that they will listen and encourage you to keep alive.

 

[Willow]

It's no problem- has there been any cause for you to want to ctb right now?

Long term stuff. I have bipolar disorder so I get pretty depressed. I'm on lots of meds and I have done ECT and lots of hospital stays. So I feel like I have tried a lot without things getting better
Also my job is really stressful and I'm not very good at it. I feel trapped there because I need the money
Thirdly I have some trauma history- abuse from a priest for a couple years as a kid. On Saturday in therapy i had an unsettling flashback and I feel like I've done lots of therapy for this without it helping.
So those are the main reasons. Feels like heavy stuff to face with no hope of improvement

 

[daruino]

Long term stuff. I have bipolar disorder so I get pretty depressed. I'm on lots of meds and I have done ECT and lots of hospital stays. So I feel like I have tried a lot without things getting better
Also my job is really stressful and I'm not very good at it. I feel trapped there because I need the money
Thirdly I have some trauma history- abuse from a priest for a couple years as a kid. On Saturday in therapy i had an unsettling flashback and I feel like I've done lots of therapy for this without it helping.
So those are the main reasons. Feels like heavy stuff to face with no hope of improvement

Yeah that's definitely a lot to deal with :// how are you feeling now? have you contacted the crisis line?

 

[Willow]

I feel a little bit better having articulated why I want to ctb. Understanding my reasons, seeing them laid out, helps me feel calmer. I think I'm going to go ahead and text 988 now. I think I want their help. Thank you so much, daurino. You have helped me more than you know