Angry.

[OvertheRainbeaux]

Is it just me but are you more ANGRY then sad? I am so ANGRY that this is the world I was brought into with out any thought or consideration for my life and well-being. Maybe that sounds selfish but I don't view it that way because I put thought and consideration into everything I do for other people, people don't do that for me and it sucks.

I go into a mental health group chat to vent I get told I'm negative and starting drama lol.
I can't win.

I vent on what I'm dealing with I get told to call the suicide hotline, focus on positive things, do things that make me happy basic shit that I think we've all tried and it DOESNT help.

I can't even fucking eat and I'm starving myself not purposely but I just can't get myself to eat losing so much weight and I just get told to just eat. I mean it's like nobody fucking gets it and I feel so so trapped.
I want to ctb and then I don't I just can't win no matter what I do. I have to struggle in all areas I'm so sick of this.
And yes I get sad and sometimes I cry but for the most part I am angry and I am resentful.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I am in a state of permanent anger. It may not seem it to some, but it's all I've got left. It's kept me going for months now, because the alternative is to give up. The anger gives me strength. It's not good and I don't want to fall prey to it, but you'll take any deal when it's the only one on the table. I too am sad, angry and resentful. I accept these things as parts of myself that I need to try and survive and I try to not let these feelings master me.

 

[OvertheRainbeaux]

I am in a state of permanent anger. It may not seem it to some, but it's all I've got left. It's kept me going for months now, because the alternative is to give up. The anger gives me strength. It's not good and I don't want to fall prey to it, but you'll take any deal when it's the only one on the table. I too am sad, angry and resentful. I accept these things as parts of myself that I need to try and survive and I try to not let these feelings master me.

It's funny because the only time I'm motivated to do anything anymore is when I'm super angry about something and it makes me not give a fuck so I am able to complete tasks that I'd otherwise push off or have anxiety about. Which I'm aware is not a good thing, but like you said it's all I have left.

 

[revolucion]

Is it just me but are you more ANGRY then sad? I am so ANGRY that this is the world I was brought into with out any thought or consideration for my life and well-being. Maybe that sounds selfish but I don't view it that way because I put thought and consideration into everything I do for other people, people don't do that for me and it sucks.

I go into a mental health group chat to vent I get told I'm negative and starting drama lol.
I can't win.

I vent on what I'm dealing with I get told to call the suicide hotline, focus on positive things, do things that make me happy basic shit that I think we've all tried and it DOESNT help.

I can't even fucking eat and I'm starving myself not purposely but I just can't get myself to eat losing so much weight and I just get told to just eat. I mean it's like nobody fucking gets it and I feel so so trapped.
I want to ctb and then I don't I just can't win no matter what I do. I have to struggle in all areas I'm so sick of this.
And yes I get sad and sometimes I cry but for the most part I am angry and I am resentful.

Yeah, I feel the same way too. I feel like I should have killed myself a long time back because life has progressively gone worse.

 

[OvertheRainbeaux]

Yeah, I feel the same way too. I feel like I should have killed myself a long time back because life has progressively gone worse.

Same here, life seriously has gotten worse and it didn't take long. And I'm still here for what? Idk.

 

[Disintegration]

Right there with ya. Life is so frustrating and I don't even want this experience. This isn't fun for me nor is it something I feel we should be thrusted into without consent. It baffles me why we aren't given the right to peacefully die after the age of 18. I especially don't understand authority figures in society, whether it's a parent, cop, teacher, priest, military, judge, politician, president, etc... How are they in charge of other people's life experiences? This world is bullshit and everyone knows it.

Suffering pervades nearly every aspect of life until you die. People are so twisted and masochistic that they even invented a way to suffer eternally after death, if you choose to believe that sort of thing. I'm especially bitter with whatever alien race or higher intelligence designed this universe... it's a cruel, Frankenstein monster type of thing to do. Something is responsible for this experience I'm having and I wish it would stop creating these types of messes. I hope something fucks with its ability to make choices about wanting another level of sentience someday, if there is such a thing. Stupid, selfish, arrogant, maniacal, self-righteous, oppressor....

 

[qwerty_in_me]

Run.
this may be the answer you are looking for. Abandon ship and go as far as you can, take what you need and never give in to the world.

This is your only conscious attempt at happiness, make it count and screw those who've wronged you!

Stay Safe
-qwerty

 

[revolucion]

Same here, life seriously has gotten worse and it didn't take long. And I'm still here for what? Idk.

Yes, I was living one day at a time after being diagnosed with severe health issues. I was depressed, clinical and I had tinnitus for over a decade now. I get fired. I lost my job, now my visa. I feel like I should've kms when the health issues had started.

 

[Hollow Point]

Yea I get more angry then sad about things. It's like a internal rage though. I'm usually pretty monotone even when I'm really bothered.

 

[selfhater]

i feel u and i relate alot
there is a huge anger inside me and i'm becoming more and more aggressive becuz of everything happened and still happening
people make it worse by telling u those stuff

 

[I’mDone]

Neither angry nor sad. I feel empty, hollow, and defeated. Wanted to ctb since my teens but always tried to make it better. Now I know there is no better. This is all there is. My bus is coming, I can hear it in the not too far distance.

 

[revolucion]

Neither angry nor sad. I feel empty, hollow, and defeated. Wanted to ctb since my teens but always tried to make it better. Now I know there is no better. This is all there is. My bus is coming, I can hear it in the not too far distance.

Many of us here will agree. Some people are not meant for a life.

 

[Kassender]

Yes, and it's getting really intense lately

More at myself than the world though

 

[revolucion]

Yes, and it's getting really intense lately

More at myself than the world though

For me it's the world.

 

[OvertheRainbeaux]

Run.
this may be the answer you are looking for. Abandon ship and go as far as you can, take what you need and never give in to the world.

This is your only conscious attempt at happiness, make it count and screw those who've wronged you!

Stay Safe
-qwerty

Idk where to run too.

 

[CatholicGuilt]

Run.
this may be the answer you are looking for. Abandon ship and go as far as you can, take what you need and never give in to the world.

This is your only conscious attempt at happiness, make it count and screw those who've wronged you!

Stay Safe
-qwerty

I have fantasized about this so many times. But, I have a husband and five kids. I don't think I could just disappear on them. I'm not sure I could fully enjoy the freedom thinking back on what they must be feeling.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

Yes I feel just as much angry over life as I am sad. I have been thru the crying and grief now I am just angry, jaded and bitter that life had to be so unbelievably cruel. I get intense bursts of anger a lot and I stay anrgy at myself. It's all due to my situation and having no way out. I definitely noticed in recent years I'm more angry about my life being terrible. My emotions have been all over, sad, angry, empty...just not happy.

 

[Darkhaven]

Hate is the main feeling on my head for almost 2 years