Discussion Am i weird/alone with that fantasy?

[_Minsk]

Hi there,

So i have been asking myself how it would be, to have a depressed partner among your side. I have been in a few relationships yet, and it was pretty hard for me, trying to hide my sad and depressed side.. Deep down i also crave real connection, i'm not desperate but i wonder how that would feel, being with someone who shares your same dreams, maybe ctb one time, no shame for being suicidal.

Someone who gets you, who knows how you feel and who can relate.. i'd imagine going on that adventure, trying to find all you need for ctb with a partner who loves you, and shares the ultimate goal of leaving this planet together really romantic. maybe because i believe the death is not the end, who knows..

i never had a depressed partner or friend whom i could talk about ctb, im not sure but i think im developing a passion/obsession for suicide, which im okay with i think..
i hope to ctb soon, but i think the breakup, of my 1 year relationship, showed me what i no longer want and what i desire deep down, maybe im wrong but i like playing with that fantasy, maybe some can relate and share their own story, or maybe im alone with it, anyway, hope you are safe and comfy during that pandemic , thanks for reading!

 

[Evermore]

You're not alone with that , I actually thought I was lol I've often thought how nice it would be to have a partner that understands and shares the same feelings as I do . Ive also thought what it would be like to end it together , there is something both romantic and comforting about ctb with them by your side , sharing the same experience. I don't know if I'd ever go through with it if I was in that situation , I have a boyfriend who has some issues with mental health but no desire to Ctb he thinks it's wrong and in a way I'm happy for him that he thinks that way because he has a desire to live . So as nice as the fantasy is I'd rather he keep his love of life than feel like i do .

 

[MotherOfCats]

I'm part of a Bipolar group and it's pretty common for two bipolar people to be in a relationship. I think it's 50/50 whether they work or not. I imagine it would be pretty similar for MDD.
I couldn't hack it personally, I think if they were down then it would pull me down too and we'd be a big miserable pit together. But it'd be nice to be able to talk about the nitty gritty with a loved one on the same level as you.