Am I obligated to fill out a Safety Plan?

[the_summoning]

I started seeing a new therapist through one of those online therapy platforms, Talkspace. I expressed that I felt empty and wished I was dead, which is a thought and feeling have most of the time. She of course asked me if I was ok and if I had the intention of harming myself, the usual. I didn't answer and she linked a safety plan PDF for me to fill out. I believe that everyone has the right to choose whether or not they want to end their own life and on what terms but I know this is unpopular which is why I joined this form for like minded people.

I'm new to therapy though and I really don't feel comfortable filling out this form since it does ask for people to contact and my family doesn't know that I'm struggling mentally and certainly don't know that I have suicidal ideations. I've also read that expressing anything like that to therapist could cause them to send people to your home to forcibly institutionalize you. My main question is if I'm obligated to fill out a safety plan and if so can I at least avoid listing contacts? I'd like to know this before I continue with anymore sessions. I reached out to her but no answer thus far.

Thanks for any advice you can give.

 

[penguinl0v3s]

I would just put fake names on the form. I would be uncomfortable with that question too.

 

[Cloud Busting]

I would just put fake names on the form. I would be uncomfortable with that question too.

This is a great suggestion and I wish I would have done that while in the psych ward. Idk why it didn't occur to me.

It's absolutely dumb to think we should call our friends and family who are not equipped to help us in a suicidal crisis and don't want to hear about it either way. Why burden them?

We need a different model for safety plans.

 

[misthios2040]

I've done many of those. Just bs your way through the form. I never take those things seriously. They just want you to do busy work because they are incapable of offering any real advice to help you cope with depression and anxiety.

On the form I would write:

"If I am feeling suicidal I would talk to my therapist or ask for help from my support system. I know I am feeling suicidal when I isolate and stop doing things that I love like my hobbies. If I feel like I am at a danger of killing myeslf I will listen to music, meditate, and do breathing exercises. I will also reflect on positive memories from my past and write in my journal."

Therepist eat that shit up. It is all a lie of course, but it's not like they will follow through with it. Just say support system as oppose to an individual family member's name.

I hope this helps.

xoxo
Misthios

 

[penguinl0v3s]

This is a great suggestion and I wish I would have done that while in the psych ward. Idk why it didn't occur to me.

It's absolutely dumb to think we should call our friends and family who are not equipped to help us in a suicidal crisis and don't want to hear about it either way. Why burden them?

We need a different model for safety plans.

Right? My ex triggered me into attempting suicide once when he was trying to help me, he was not able to handle me but I don't blame him because it wasn't his fucking job lmao. And then with friends, they will get tired of you if shit happens too often and it gets all awkward.

 

[Cloud Busting]

Right? My ex triggered me into attempting suicide once when he was trying to help me, he was not able to handle me but I don't blame him because it wasn't his fucking job lmao. And then with friends, they will get tired of you if shit happens too often and it gets all awkward.

I tried explaining this to staff and they're all like "well surely someone cares!"

It's not that people don't care. It's that it is exhausting to deal with a chronically suicidal person. There are trained professionals for a reason.

My therapist suggested maybe just say "hey I'd like to clear my mind, maybe we can go for a walk?" instead of saying outright I'm suicidal or distressed. I mean sure, but I don't expect people to drop everything to help me.

I like the idea of safety plans in theory but in execution they suck. No one likes a morbid bastard. Depression is hidden for a reason. But professionals don't care about the truth.

 

[the_summoning]

Thanks to everyone who replied. I'll just fill it out randomly then since it seems like its more of a CYA/busywork thing.

 

[Cloud Busting]

Thanks to everyone who replied. I'll just fill it out randomly then since it seems like its more of a CYA/busywork thing.

You have to wonder how much the safety plan protocol is built to help people vs a liability measure

 

[the_summoning]

I tried explaining this to staff and they're all like "well surely someone cares!"

It's not that people don't care. It's that it is exhausting to deal with a chronically suicidal person. There are trained professionals for a reason.

My therapist suggested maybe just say "hey I'd like to clear my mind, maybe we can go for a walk?" instead of saying outright I'm suicidal or distressed. I mean sure, but I don't expect people to drop everything to help me.

I like the idea of safety plans in theory but in execution they suck. No one likes a morbid bastard. Depression is hidden for a reason. But professionals don't care about the truth.

I totally agree. I don't really want to burden others with my constant mental health issues and my parents, especially my mom would completely freak out if she found out. Its much easier said than done when it comes to building a support network. Not everyone in our lives has the temperament to deal with those kinds of issues.

You have to wonder how much the safety plan protocol is built to help people vs a liability measure

When I googled it and read more about it, it seems like it depends on the therapist. Some therapists said they work with the patient to fill it out and treat it more like an exercise to learn to cope with the suicidal thoughts. Others seem to not feel its that useful but use it as a CYA and maybe because its required for them.

 

[penguinl0v3s]

You have to wonder how much the safety plan protocol is built to help people vs a liability measure

I'm not convinced that anyone has ever followed a safety plan before. If I were in acute distress enough to try to ctb, I'm not going to think 'man the thing I filled out on a piece of paper during therapy is telling me to do this instead of dying.'

 

[Cloud Busting]

I totally agree. I don't really want to burden others with my constant mental health issues and my parents, especially my mom would completely freak out if she found out. Its much easier said than done when it comes to building a support network. Not everyone in our lives has the temperament to deal with those kinds of issues.

Yes. Even mentally ill people don't always want to deal with a person at their worse. It's not out of lack of empathy. It's that it's draining.

I think some of it has to do with the fact that suicide is such a horrifying reality that people would rather put a bandaid on it than explore the issues behind it, since it's uncomfortable and unsettling. Even if we lived in a more compassionate and open world, it would still be a thing. Caregiver burnout is a thing.

I'm not in any way trying to imply people with conditions or disabilities are a burden fyi. It is our duty to have compassion in a meaningless desert imo. I just mean to say that conditions themselves can be exhausting for the sufferer themselves, so it stands to reason dealing with a person at their worst can be hard sometimes, even if you love them.

When I googled it and read more about it, it seems like it depends on the therapist. Some therapists said they work with the patient to fill it out and treat it more like an exercise to learn to cope with the suicidal thoughts. Others seem to not feel its that useful but use it as a CYA and maybe because its required for them.

It was definitely a CYA measure in the psych ward

I have to remember that it's often the system itself- not the workers- that's at fault. When I was a support worker at a group home I had to follow a bunch of stupid standards I didn't agree with due to red tape and government regulations. It's hard to remember that sometimes tho.

I'm not convinced that anyone has ever followed a safety plan before. If I were in acute distress enough to try to ctb, I'm not going to think 'man the thing I filled out on a piece of paper during therapy is telling me to do this instead of dying.'

What I'm trying to do is recognize the signs that lead to an acute crisis and work on coping skills before it escalates. Once I'm in crisis mode, there's no crawling back