W

wanttodie.nz

Student
Jul 24, 2019
114
Two nights ago it was nice enough the same as tonight but I think it's too cold. I do want to ctb because I don't want to face my future. Am I just being lazy and looking for excuses?
 
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V

Vegrau

Wizard
Nov 27, 2018
665
In a way arent we all just want to avoid/running away from something? People struggling to live to avoid death. People want to die to avoid living. Excuses, reasons are what we make them to be. It ultimately depend on you which one you want to believe in.
 
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FF777

FF777

Death is a natural part of life..
Jul 21, 2019
60
Probably looking for excuses because there is probably a part of you that still isn't ready to ctb.. CTB is a huge decision that can be intimidating and scary.. I have extended my ctb date plenty of times.. I'm not sure I'm ready for such a big change as death, but at some point life becomes over-bearing enough that you stop pushing the date back..
If things like it being a bit too cold are causing you to hesitate from ctb, you might do well to do some introspective thinking for a while and figure out if what you are planning is truly what you desire or not.. You wouldn't want to ctb only to regret the decision later now would you?..
 
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FoxtrotOscar

FoxtrotOscar

Member
Nov 13, 2018
32
That depends on what you perceive your future to be... Maybe if you are have found your self in a situation that despite all your best efforts you were forced into and there is no way out, that your life is no longer your own, that any perceived future is one in which you see nothing but further pain then no that's not laziness (whether that is justification to CTB or not is another thing).

Maybe you can't face the idea of simply living, that its too much effort to continue then that is most likely depression. I find it very difficult to think that someone would have a real desire to CTB simply because they were too lazy. If someone were contemplating suicide just because they couldn't be bothered then I can't believe they would ever be bothered to do it. Everyone at times have said something along the lines of "Meh, why don't I just kill myself then I don't have to worry about all of this rubbish" but I can't imagine a world in which they would then do something as severe as then commit suicide without some real underlying problems.
 
W

wanttodie.nz

Student
Jul 24, 2019
114
There has been a lot of things going on over the past year and I feel tired and defeated. I lost my job, my wife wanted to separate so basically my whole life has collapsed around me. The only thing I want in my life is to live in my house, with my wife and my kids who I only see every second weekend. I;m a burden on my family. Everyone either doesn't need me or is better off without me. But yes ctb is a huge choice and I want to be absolutely sure about it. It just doesn't feel like the right time for me.
 
FoxtrotOscar

FoxtrotOscar

Member
Nov 13, 2018
32
There has been a lot of things going on over the past year and I feel tired and defeated. I lost my job, my wife wanted to separate so basically my whole life has collapsed around me. The only thing I want in my life is to live in my house, with my wife and my kids who I only see every second weekend. I;m a burden on my family. Everyone either doesn't need me or is better off without me. But yes ctb is a huge choice and I want to be absolutely sure about it. It just doesn't feel like the right time for me.

Then its not :)

You have been through a huge trauma and some people might consider that enough reason to CTB. Laziness? No. Depression? Well I certainly would be in that situation. In need of time to reassess and adjust, yes :).
 

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