L
lonelyAusM51
Member
- Aug 15, 2023
- 7
Hi...I an new year been lurking for a few days...
I am 51 and have recently separated from my wife after 23 years of marriage which has totally blindsided me. My wife was my best friend and my entire life and I now feel completely abandoned, I am extremely lonely and depressed and cannot get these bad feelings out of my head - this is not the 1st time I have been suicidal but I have managed to deal with these feelings in the past but I am so overwhelmed this time that I cannot see any other way out... I have already written my suicide note and have researched the method I am going to use its just a matter of purchasing the materials and testing everything - I even have a date in mind being 8/11/23 (our wedding anniversary) but not sure I can even wait until then. I just want the pain to go away, there are alot of unresolved things that still need to be dealt with but I don't have the will or motivation to deal with them - am I being selfish in wanting to CTB before resolving things? thanks for taking the time to read this...
I am 51 and have recently separated from my wife after 23 years of marriage which has totally blindsided me. My wife was my best friend and my entire life and I now feel completely abandoned, I am extremely lonely and depressed and cannot get these bad feelings out of my head - this is not the 1st time I have been suicidal but I have managed to deal with these feelings in the past but I am so overwhelmed this time that I cannot see any other way out... I have already written my suicide note and have researched the method I am going to use its just a matter of purchasing the materials and testing everything - I even have a date in mind being 8/11/23 (our wedding anniversary) but not sure I can even wait until then. I just want the pain to go away, there are alot of unresolved things that still need to be dealt with but I don't have the will or motivation to deal with them - am I being selfish in wanting to CTB before resolving things? thanks for taking the time to read this...