Help Accepting It

[Joey]

I'm 26 and going on 27 in several months.

I've always been that weird dude in school and it's pretty sad that I've never had an actual real relationship, not had sex, and not even kissed anyone. Not even hold someone's hand. I did go on a couple of dates but I was too damn awkward back then.

I see everyone being happy in relationships and getting married/having kids. I used to care so much about it but now that's only society pressuring me. I really don't care about all of that stuff anymore and I've basically turned myself aromantic by being alone for so long and having a couple of close friends.

How can I accept this new reality for myself and know that I'll never find anyone? I have no interest to get into any dating apps or anything in the scene at all due to seeing how there's always drama/friend zone. I want none of that.

Thanks! :)

 

[ladolcemorte]

After the demise of several relationships I reached the conclusion that I just wasn't interested in pursuing romance. I used to really want a relationship and was devastated after every break up. But after the last break up in 2016, I decided I was not going through any more bull****. I refused to open myself up to that kind of agony ever again.

I can't say how exactly I accepted that I will never have a relationship. I think it was over time. I just kept telling myself that I didn't care and eventually I believed it. Now I can truthfully and confidently say that I am ok with the fact that I won't ever have a relationship. (My problems are related to my career, the demise of which I cannot accept).

 

[mathieu]

In some ways you're better off without it. I just get my heart broken again and again. I will be alone forever too but have had a taste of it I know what I'm missing.

 

[Joey]

In some ways you're better off without it. I just get my heart broken again and again. I will be alone forever too but have had a taste of it I know what I'm missing.

Maybe not this life but hopefully the next...maybe.

I want to do things for myself and I'm not selfish in anyway :)

 

[timf]

There are a thousand shades of gray in relationships. You might experiment with chatting up a check out cleark at the grocery or convenience store. They may not have much time for conversation so you can experiment with the short comment and see if you can solicit any response. For example, you might say, "You sure look like you could use a vacation". Or you might say, "Since they are working you twice as hard, it is a good thing they are paying you twice as much". A short comment does not make too much of a demand on someone.

These situations generally never even develop to the acquaintanceship level, however, they are useful in social skill development. The more people you meet and converse with (even short exchanges) slowly build the skills that might open the door to increasingly deeper relationships. Just be cautious and do not expect too much from others. As a general rule people prefer to talk about themselves than listen to others, so asking questions is the best way to open a dialog.

 

[june]

Hugs to you asll. Sorry for the suffering

 

[whatevs]

Thoughts on this now, Joe?

 

[Sherri]

You're an amazing guy, and we interact a lot, you have a a great sense of humour. Happiness is not by being married and havung kids, he's a partner helps to cope with loneliness. Unfortunately good old fashioned romance is hard to find these days, its all online, or through someone we meet at work. But you are still young joe. I a,ways tell you , that you overthink. Let life take its natural course, don't look for it, it will find you sweetie.