Abusive father forcing me to take a drug that’s resulting in Tardive Dyskinesia

[Wrennie]

I consulted an attorney and apparently I have no rights. He can continue to force this poison down my throat until I'm a spasming, tremoring mess with zero motor coordination and who cannot bear to go out in public due to the embarrassment associated with the condition.

I believe I've caught it early, but that doesn't matter if I cannot go off of the drug that's causing it in the first place.

Never, ever trust your parents not to abuse their guardianship over you. Never sign away your rights. The dumbest thing I ever did was assume mine had my best interests at heart. I assumed that they loved me and wanted a future for me where I could be healthy and happy. It couldn't have been further from the truth. Every waking moment of my life is physical and mental torture. And it's perfectly legal for them to do this to me. I'm not human anymore in the eyes of the law. I don't have any say over what does or does not go into my body. I don't have any say over remotely anything in my life. My mother sits there passively as my father irreversibly damages me, and if I even think of trying to refuse the drugs that are causing me so much torment, my father threatens to physically harm me. But apparently a guardian physically harming their "pet" is okay so long as I'm resisting their "treatment".

I am so completely and utterly cornered that death is becoming more and more plausible for me everyday. I don't know how much longer I can hang on. I don't want to die, but I can't see any other option left for me. My parents have essentially discovered a way to indirectly murder me and completely get away with it.

Ironically the only reason I'm incapacitated enough to require guardianship in the first place is because of their sh*tty parenting and the childhood trauma they inflicted upon me. Lovely that the law refuses to make the connection between abusive families and their desire for guardianship.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I consulted an attorney and apparently I have no rights

may i ask more about this. i just cant see it possible. in some places yes but (unless you put in the wrong location) i cant see it where you live. where i am we have adult rights at 16 aside from booze marriage and drugs.

 

[noname223]

I develop tardive dyskinesia too. At the moment it is not that bad. But it will be just another reason to ctb. My life is more hell now. BUt it would not have changed the outcome i guess.

 

[Wrennie]

may i ask more about this. i just cant see it possible. in some places yes but (unless you put in the wrong location) i cant see it where you live. where i am we have adult rights at 16 aside from booze marriage and drugs.

I live in New England.

They have guardianship and a Roger's Order over me.

 

[Ghost2211]

Can't just pretend to take it, and get rid of it?

 

[Life_and_Death]

Ironically the only reason I'm incapacitated enough to require guardianship in the first place is because of their sh*tty parenting and the childhood trauma they inflicted upon me. Lovely that the law refuses to make the connection between abusive families and their desire for guardianship.

and im guessing you brought this up to the lawyer. sometimes its best to get the opinion of several lawyers. get a restraining order or some legal action against your parents maybe

 

[Intotheflames]

I fail to understand how you signed away your rights if you didn't have mental competency in the first place? Wouldn't it invalid the signing? Alternatively if you were competent at the time signing, but since then you are not can't it be argued that your guardians are failing their duty or that the medications you are taking not working so that you could change to one with less/different side effects?

 

[Wrennie]

I fail to understand how you signed away your rights if you didn't have mental competency in the first place? Wouldn't it invalid the signing? Alternatively if you were competent at the time signing, but since then you are not can't it be argued that your guardians are failing their duty or that the medications you are taking not working so that you could change to one with less/different side effects?

I'm trying to convince my psychiatrist to lower my meds and explain the side effects I'm experiencing to him, but he's very rigid in his thinking and firmly believes that these drugs are "safe" and without adverse effects, which is incredibly frustrating when those adverse effects have literally become my everyday life.

 

[woknows]

I am sorry for your situation. Sounds like you have bad parents. I also have narcissistic parents. They did untold damage to me. Some people should be sterilized before birth.

 

[Wrennie]

I fail to understand how you signed away your rights if you didn't have mental competency in the first place? Wouldn't it invalid the signing? Alternatively if you were competent at the time signing, but since then you are not can't it be argued that your guardians are failing their duty or that the medications you are taking not working so that you could change to one with less/different side effects?

I didn't even know they had a Roger's Order filed over me until recently. Somehow they were able to go behind my back and get one without consulting me. I never even got to speak with a lawyer about it. If there was a hearing, I wasn't present for it. How on earth that's legal... I have zero clue.

I am sorry for your situation. Sounds like you have bad parents. I also have narcissistic parents. They did untold damage to me. Some people should be sterilized before birth.

Speaking of sterilization, ironically a Roger's Order could permit them to involuntarily "sterilize" me. Thankfully that's not something they're interested in doing, but the fact remains that it's an option, which is... terrifying to say the least.

 

[Intotheflames]

I didn't even know they had a Roger's Order filed over me until recently. Somehow they were able to go behind my back and get one without consulting me. I never even got to speak with a lawyer about it. If there was a hearing, I wasn't present for it. How on earth that's legal... I have zero clue.

Don't know if this helps, a quick research showed me this - http://psychrights.org/States/Massachusetts/RogersOrders/RogersOrdersMemo.pdf

You can contact the organization as they have the exact same concern as you, and see how it goes.

 

[Weary Soul]

I consulted an attorney and apparently I have no rights. He can continue to force this poison down my throat until I'm a spasming, tremoring mess with zero motor coordination and who cannot bear to go out in public due to the embarrassment associated with the condition.

I believe I've caught it early, but that doesn't matter if I cannot go off of the drug that's causing it in the first place.

Never, ever trust your parents not to abuse their guardianship over you. Never sign away your rights. The dumbest thing I ever did was assume mine had my best interests at heart. I assumed that they loved me and wanted a future for me where I could be healthy and happy. It couldn't have been further from the truth. Every waking moment of my life is physical and mental torture. And it's perfectly legal for them to do this to me. I'm not human anymore in the eyes of the law. I don't have any say over what does or does not go into my body. I don't have any say over remotely anything in my life. My mother sits there passively as my father irreversibly damages me, and if I even think of trying to refuse the drugs that are causing me so much torment, my father threatens to physically harm me. But apparently a guardian physically harming their "pet" is okay so long as I'm resisting their "treatment".

I am so completely and utterly cornered that death is becoming more and more plausible for me everyday. I don't know how much longer I can hang on. I don't want to die, but I can't see any other option left for me. My parents have essentially discovered a way to indirectly murder me and completely get away with it.

Ironically the only reason I'm incapacitated enough to require guardianship in the first place is because of their sh*tty parenting and the childhood trauma they inflicted upon me. Lovely that the law refuses to make the connection between abusive families and their desire for guardianship.

My family was incredibly abusive. I understand.

There are two FDA-approved medicines to treat tardive dyskinesia (TD): Deutetrabenazine (Austedo) and Valbenazine (Ingrezza). But IMO the best option would be to stop the med. However, if you do need a med like the one that is giving you TD, then maybe ask for one in the same class that has fewer side effects?

On a personal note, my father molested me when I was a child and at that time there were no protective services for children. I desperately wanted to get away from him and when I told someone what was happening, they said - tell him to stop it. (SMH - like telling him to stop would have done anything). I too could not get away from him.

Years later, someone told me I should have pretended to have a seizure when he went to assault me. I am not sure it would have stopped him, but it was an option that never occurred to me.

I am wondering if in your case, you could pretend to have a seizure or some other serious side effect (like an allergy) and say that it only happen(s) after you took the med that caused TD, maybe, just maybe they would discontinue the med.

It might not get you away from your abuser, but it might to stop the TD, which is extremely debilitating.

I am not one who is comfortable with lying or being dishonest - but I so wish I had done something like this when I was younger. It would have saved me so much pain.

I am so sorry you are going through this. My heart breaks to hear of parental abuse.

<3

 

[Chupacabra 44]

I would keep working through your psychiatrist to get your medication switched. They should be able to work with you to find one that won't give you serious side effects.

In this situation, your dad is likely just following the direction of your psychiatrist. Win over your psychiatrist to switch meds, and your dad will follow.

If you are up to it, I would research viable alternatives and would suggest to your psychiatrist what exactly you would prefer to try.

Knowledge is power. Show your psychiatrist that you are on top of your shit, and you're more likely to obtain their cooperation. Having any studies handy illustrating the risk for tardive dyskinesia from your current medication to provide directly to your psychiatrist would be wise. Don't assume they know.

 

[Teal_Blue_Dreams]

this is terrible. i am so sorry! my heart goes out to you and your suffering. hopefully, some ss fam can give you some good advice. i don't even know what to say to this. Hugs!

 

[Chupacabra 44]

Also, if you're in the states contact NAMI for advice. Their website is attached below. Also, perhaps you can contact a social worker from your county, and explain the situation. See what they have to say. I might even formally document your psychiatrist as to the side effect. Putting it in writing might better get their attention.

Homepage

NAMI is the National Alliance on Mental Illness, the nation’s largest grassroots mental health organization dedicated to building better lives for the millions of Americans affected by mental illness.

nami.org

 

[Weary Soul]

Also, if you're in the states contact NAMI for advice. Their website is attached below. Also, perhaps you can contact a social worker from your county, and explain the situation. See what they have to say. I might even formally document your psychiatrist as to the side effect. Putting it in writing might better get their attention.

Homepage

NAMI is the National Alliance on Mental Illness, the nation’s largest grassroots mental health organization dedicated to building better lives for the millions of Americans affected by mental illness.

nami.org

Some other ideas?

If you are 18 years of age or older, and live in the states, you just might be able to charge him with assualt. Your report will be documented and you could ask the courts for an independent guardian. Not sure this would work, but it might be worth a try, I would recommend documenting how he has abused his so-called authority even though you may have signed a POA. You may also be able to voluntarily commit yourself to a psych ward, where they will definitely (or should) review all medications you are taking and modify them as needed.

If you are less than 18 and live in the states - call child protective services. They are required to help you.

Just some ideas - not sure any are feasible. I am so sorry you are going through this.

 

[Nodscene]

I've been lucky enough where I've always been able to outright refuse to take any meds that I had a problem with and that most definitely includes those that have the side effect or Tardive Diskonesia.

As you are being forced to take it can't you just cheek the pills (hide them in the side of your mouth or under your tongue) until you can split them out safely. If you were literal and it's being forced down your throat then it's time to try your acting chops and pretend to give in to their wishes so it gives you control of taking the pills. Even if you have to take them i front of your parents it's still easy to hide them in your mouth


If you can manage that it will give you time to hopefully find a legal route to stop this situation in one way or another.

I'm really sorry to hear about the abuse as it's frankly disgusting. These new drugs keep getting worse and worse side effects and should not have passed the FDA approval process or whatever the equivalent is in your country.

A less likely option (from the sounds of things) is to ask for different meds. There are always alternatives and not all of them have this particular side effect.

 

[Wrennie]

Can't just pretend to take it, and get rid of it?

That's definitely a good short-term solution, but I know I'll get caught eventually, and when I do who knows what Hell they'll inflict upon me.

Some other ideas?

If you are 18 years of age or older, and live in the states, you just might be able to charge him with assualt. Your report will be documented and you could ask the courts for an independent guardian. Not sure this would work, but it might be worth a try, I would recommend documenting how he has abused his so-called authority even though you may have signed a POA. You may also be able to voluntarily commit yourself to a psych ward, where they will definitely (or should) review all medications you are taking and modify them as needed.

If you are less than 18 and live in the states - call child protective services. They are required to help you.

Just some ideas - not sure any are feasible. I am so sorry you are going through this.

My social worker did say that she would legally have to report my parents if they were to assault me. My fear is then being sent to a psychiatric facility or group home where they have the legal right to physically restrain me and force meds on me, and my parents could still override any medical decisions I were to make pertaining to medication.

Don't know if this helps, a quick research showed me this - http://psychrights.org/States/Massachusetts/RogersOrders/RogersOrdersMemo.pdf

You can contact the organization as they have the exact same concern as you, and see how it goes.

Thank you so much, I'll definitely look into that. A friend of mine helped me contact a disability advocacy group today as well.

 

[Weary Soul]

That's definitely a good short-term solution, but I know I'll get caught eventually, and when I do who knows what Hell they'll inflict upon me.

My social worker did say that she would legally have to report my parents if they were to assault me. My fear is then being sent to a psychiatric facility or group home where they have the legal right to physically restrain me and force meds on me, and my parents could still override any medical decisions I were to make pertaining to medication.

Thank you so much, I'll definitely look into that. A friend of mine helped me contact a disability advocacy group today as well.

Yes, it would be a short-term solution, but one that would hopefully eliminate the immediate problem of TD. And maybe you would not even need to pretend at all to get away from your abusers if you can explain the situation to a medical professional or your therapist.

According to NAMI (see https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Treatments/Mental-Health-Medications/Tardive-Dyskinesia), "If TD develops, the first step is to notify the doctor so the medication can be safely adjusted, stopped or switched." If there has been no attempt or discussion about this, it is negligence.

A group home is of concern, but I wonder if it would be worse than being forced to take a medication that may permanently disable you? I do not know. Also, there are laws around the use of restraints that give you rights. If restraints are used outside of those laws (or in essence illegally), it would be traumatic, but ultimately the home would face serious consequences.

The fact that your parents are clearly abusing you (if they are continuing to make you take a medication that can permanently disable you without trying to find another med that has less of risk of TD), legally they too could face serious consequences and would likely loose any rights they have over controlling you.

Please know that I by no means know all the answers, and am just putting some ideas out there.

I am so very glad that your friend is helping you. That is likely the best place to start and I would also talk to your therapist about it - mentioning that they are forcing you to take a med that may permanently disable you and asking him/her what can be done about it.

<3

 

[Wrennie]

Yes, it would be a short-term solution, but one that would hopefully eliminate the immediate problem of TD. And maybe you would not even need to pretend at all to get away from your abusers if you can explain the situation to a medical professional or your therapist.

According to NAMI (see https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Treatments/Mental-Health-Medications/Tardive-Dyskinesia), "If TD develops, the first step is to notify the doctor so the medication can be safely adjusted, stopped or switched." If there has been no attempt or discussion about this, it is negligence.

A group home is of concern, but I wonder if it would be worse than being forced to take a medication that may permanently disable you? I do not know. Also, there are laws around the use of restraints that give you rights. If restraints are used outside of those laws (or in essence illegally), it would be traumatic, but ultimately the home would face serious consequences.

The fact that your parents are clearly abusing you (if they are continuing to make you take a medication that can permanently disable you without trying to find another med that has less of risk of TD), legally they too could face serious consequences and would likely loose any rights they have over controlling you.

Please know that I by no means know all the answers, and am just putting some ideas out there.

I am so very glad that your friend is helping you. That is likely the best place to start and I would also talk to your therapist about it - mentioning that they are forcing you to take a med that may permanently disable you and asking him/her what can be done about it.

<3

Thank you for the advice. I will try and attempt to conceal the fact that I'm not taking meds, at least in an effort to combat the worsening of my condition.

I am working with my therapist and she's informed of my current situation, and thankfully she agrees that it's terrible. It's mainly the Roger's Order that is stumping both of us and preventing her from helping to devise a way for me to take action because she's unfamiliar with the specifics of what it entails.

I really hope that my psychiatrist ends up listening to me. The drug that I'm on which could cause TD isn't an antipsychotic, but a type of antidepressant that also influences dopamine (so TD is possible, it's just rarer). I can picture my psychiatrist going on about how safe the drug is and how unconmon that particular side effect is, and since my symptoms aren't extremely noticeable yet to anyone other than myself (thank god) I can see him dismissing what I have to say. But naturally I don't want to be kept on the drug until I get to a point where my symptoms are obvious to everyone else around me because there's literally nothing I can do once I reach that stage.

 

[Weary Soul]

If your psychiatrist does this: ...going on about how safe the drug is and how unconmon that particular side effect is, and since my symptoms aren't extremely noticeable yet to anyone other than myself (thank god) I can see him dismissing what I have to say.

Fire him/her and hire another.

I say this, but I know how difficult this is to do, and I do not have a lot of faith in the medical institution because doctors almost killed me.

Will be praying (not in a religious way per se) that you can get the help that you have every right to get.

Heart is with you. <3

 

[Uzera]

What if you just say no? What will happen?

 

[Wrennie]

What if you just say no? What will happen?

I wish that were an option, but since they have a Roger's Order filed over me they could have me physically restrained and the meds forcibly administered, or have me committed to a psych ward where the doctors would do the exact same thing.

If your psychiatrist does this: ...going on about how safe the drug is and how unconmon that particular side effect is, and since my symptoms aren't extremely noticeable yet to anyone other than myself (thank god) I can see him dismissing what I have to say.

Fire him/her and hire another.

I say this, but I know how difficult this is to do, and I do not have a lot of faith in the medical institution because doctors almost killed me.

Will be praying (not in a religious way per se) that you can get the help that you have every right to get.

Heart is with you. <3

Thank you so much, I truly appreciate it.

I'm so sorry to hear that doctors have failed you too. Such a tragedy when the people that are supposed to help you instead serve as the nail in your coffin.