A response to the question: Will the cops go through my things?

[GoodPersonEffed]

Take in to account that this was thirty years ago, but basic law enforcement investigative procedures don't change much.

In high school, I had a boyfriend commit suicide at his home. When the homicide detectives came to the scene, they went through his things. They found notes from his girlfriend, and when they asked his mom about it, she said, "He was seeing a cop's daughter."

They instantly knew who it was, because my dad was a homicide detective, and my name is not common. Had my dad gotten to work ten minutes earlier, he would have been assigned to the case.

My dad was informed, and my mom came to school and got me before anyone outside of my boyfriend's family even knew what had happened.

Based on this personal experience, and dinner table conversations over the decades my father was a death investigator, it's my understanding that, in trying to rule out homicide, the police will go through the person's things to determine the cause of death, as well as interview next of kin and those closest to them, like neighbors. There was nothing in my letters that indicated I'd done anything to motivate the suicide, we were totally fine and his act came as a complete shock. I was never questioned as it wasn't deemed necessary, it was a clear case of suicide. My letters were irrelevant in the case, but they were considered as potential evidence until proven they weren't.

I had only been dating him a short time, there was much I didn't know about him. Turns out that one of his closest friends was the son of a cop who was also a friend of my dad, and I'd grown up knowing that family. Months before, my boyfriend had gone on a hunting trip with his friend and his dad, and the dad, having been notified of the suicide as well, recognized the shotgun shell, so my boyfriend had been saving it since that trip.

The police try to establish a chain of evidence and events to determine it wasn't a homicide. So if one is concerned that the police will go through their private things after they suicide, even if they ctb at a different location, it's best to assume that they will and plan accordingly. I would assume they will also look at social media accounts, especially as online bullying can lead to arrests and convictions for crimes such as manslaughter or encouraging suicide. Once one dies, they no longer have privacy, and every belonging and communication will more likely than not be considered as potential evidence.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

Thanks for sharing. Makes planning for our belongings so much more important.

 

[Ulisses]

good to have that kind of information about how an investigation works. my ctb location will be in a hotel away from home, in another state.

 

[faust]

Thank you for information!
But I have some questions concerning this subject.
1) If there is notification to police, like what was used to die, with the exact details, will they investigate further? Is it necessary at all to make all the things easier for them?
2) If the parcel is seized, how long does it usually take for investigation to start? E.g. John Johnson ordered H and his method was seized by customs. How long does it usually take for the cops to come or John will merely receive a letter from police asking to come on his own?
3) If John Johnson is reported missing, who will cover all search operation costs? Is it better to leave coordinates in this case to avoid unnecessary expenditures for family?
4) If there are two suicide partners, like John Johnson and James Jameson, one is found dead, another is reported missing (but ofc he is dead), will this be a suicide case or a homicide?
5) If suicide is committed in a tent, e.g. with a charcoal, and after a certain time tent is set on fire with no notifications to police, will this be a suicide or a homicide case?

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Thank you for information!
But I have some questions concerning this subject.
1) If there is notification to police, like what was used to die, with the exact details, will they investigate further? Is it necessary at all to make all the things easier for them?
2) If the parcel is seized, how long does it usually take for investigation to start? E.g. John Johnson ordered H and his method was seized by customs. How long does it usually take for the cops to come or John will merely receive a letter from police asking to come on his own?
3) If John Johnson is reported missing, who will cover all search operation costs? Is it better to leave coordinates in this case to avoid unnecessary expenditures for family?
4) If there are two suicide partners, like John Johnson and James Jameson, one is found dead, another is reported missing (but ofc he is dead), will this be a suicide case or a homicide?
5) If suicide is committed in a tent, e.g. with a charcoal, and after a certain time tent is set on fire with no notifications to police, will this be a suicide or a homicide case?

OMG, @faust!

I'll see what I can do with this.

1) They're going to investigate and will do an autopsy. I think it would help to make things easier, but they investigate independently. For all they know, one could be leaving red herrings. If the chain of evidence and events fits the information one leaves, then it makes the investigation easier. But they're not going to rely on the potential victim or allow themselves or the investigation to be directed by anyone, they're going to rely on evidence.

2) I don't know anything about customs investigations and seizures, that's a different topic.

3) Search and recovery are funded by the LE agency. If one fakes their death, then they can be made to make restitution.

4) All suicides are treated as under suspicion of homicide. Either one must be sufficiently ruled out or sufficiently proven, neither is assumed without sufficient evidence such as a body, autopsy, primary and secondary scene investigation, reconstructing the chain of events, etc.

5) Suspected homicide until all evidence is gathered. Arson investigation will also be involved.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

Living is hard, dying seems impossible..

 

[SpottedPanda]

I think it's always best to assume they will, and plan accordingly.

 

[Ulisses]

I think it's always best to assume they will, and plan accordingly.

very sensible comment, I think so too. intend to leave a written note that it was suicide and the product used to leave no doubt.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

very sensible comment, I think so too. intend to leave a written note that it was suicide and the product used to leave no doubt.

One could even video themselves for LE and leave note that it's on one's electronic device. In the video, one can demonstrate there is no one else anywhere in the hotel room, and say, "This is solely by my own choice and my own hand."

 

[Ulisses]

One could even video themselves for LE and leave note that it's on one's electronic device. In the video, one can demonstrate there is no one else anywhere in the hotel room, and say, "This is solely by my own choice and my own hand."

this idea is very good.

 

[woxihuanni]

Oh wow, I'll make sure to leave a very clear note that my worthless ex-ish partner killed me as near as it gets to literally. Hope they go to prison.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Oh wow, I'll make sure to leave a very clear note that my worthless ex-ish partner killed me as near as it gets to literally. Hope they go to prison.

Yup. A detailed narrative with facts, evidence and witnesses will also help support what you present. Also a reminder of cases of convictions for online bullying and pushing to suicide. I read your other thread, would be great if you could manipulate her to repeat it near a hidden recording device. I'm sure you know her ego and can play it to your benefit.

 

[Lethe]

Could survivors who live in the same house get in trouble if street drugs belonging to the deceased were found in the house?

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Could survivors who live in the same house get in trouble if street drugs belonging to the deceased were found in the house?

You'll need to research this, don't take my word for it....

They will be confiscated if found while processing the scene.

But say you ctb in your room and they're found in your room. That's part of the scene. They're not being seized as the result of a warrant in which someone was under suspicion.

But if other people live there, and there are drugs out in the living room and others are there, it's conceivable they could get busted.

Or if there's suspicion after what was found in your room, they now have probable cause to get a warrant. I don't know if probable cause would be enough to search the house without a warrant.

Definitely check the laws in your area and find out whose jurisdiction you're under, such as in the US, city = police, county = sherrifs. Each jurisdiction will have different laws and procedures. One needs to know their rights, and should film all interactions with and actions of LE while they are on the property. One should also know their 4th amendment rights (watch police auditing videos on YouTube!), because cops will try to manipulate compliance when they don't have the law to back them up. One must know their rights, stand firm, and, if they can, record interactions with video and/or audio.

 

[Pryras]

First of all, thank you for sharing and i can't imagine what that would have been like emotionally for you. Did the police find anything that could answer why he did it?

The cops in my (rather small) city are pretty lax. I think it's always best to err on the side of caution and take the proper steps in case they are pushed to investigate more thoroughly.

Unfortunately, I have a mother who will blame everyone but herself if I CTB so I'm sure a bunch of people are going to get cops knocking on their doors. I've seen parents do this when their child CTB as a way of closure since it's nearly incomprehensible that their child would EVER commit suicide in first place. Easier to place blame on someone else than accept what happened for what it is.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

First of all, thank you for sharing and i can't imagine what that would have been like emotionally for you. Did the police find anything that could answer why he did it?

The cops in my (rather small) city are pretty lax. I think it's always best to err on the side of caution and take the proper steps in case they are pushed to investigate more thoroughly.

Unfortunately, I have a mother who will blame everyone but herself if I CTB so I'm sure a bunch of people are going to get cops knocking on their doors. I've seen parents do this when their child CTB as a way of closure since it's nearly incomprehensible that their child would EVER commit suicide in first place. Easier to place blame on someone else than accept what happened for what it is.

No, he did not leave a note, and did not drop any hints.

Another thing that I learned from my father is that people will always seek a reason. In the case of his family, his mother said that he had a brain clot and that's why he did it. But my dad said, and I'll put this in a spoiler so no one is triggered:

Spoiler

Of course there were blood clots. He suicided with shotgun to the head.

Thank you for your compassion. It was indeed hell to go through. I was scapegoated by my entire school because of something I said the morning he died, before anyone even knew, and in fact he was already dead when I said it, and so the rumor went around the whole school district (teen suicides were rare then) that I broke up with him and that's why he did it. Years after, I had moved away and went back to that city to visit and saw a girl I was barely acquainted with from that school and she said, "Oh, you're the girl whose boyfriend killed himself because you broke up with him!" And once again I sighed and said, "I did not break up with him."

Interestingly, about 10 years ago I went to a therapist because I recognized I was having a PTSD reaction when I needed to stand up for myself. I thought it was because of all the years of fighting with my mother and being hit for arguing and standing up. I did a session of EMDR and it came up that the root cause was not being able to defend myself when literally almost 2,000 people were talking about me and blaming me for his death, and because of how the situation was twisted by the timing, and the real reasons behind what I'd said (my mother being hypercontrolling and abusive), I felt like the best response was to just stay quiet and try to handle it with grace, when it is my way to speak up. It was such a relief to heal from that! And for decades, I was very pro-life, I felt victimized by people who expressed wanting to suicide or attempted, and I was quite a judgmental ass to them about it. It's taken a long time to heal, and I'm sure there are still some lingering effects. It would have been helpful if he'd left a note.

In fact, it's only just recently that I came to the realization that he probably had an abusive family, too. A 16-year-old kid with a supportive family does not kill themselves, not back then when there wasn't the Internet or social media or a bullying epidemic or teen suicide epidemic. He was well-liked, not isolated, had good friends, a job, the freedom of his own car and motorcycle, new clothes, hairstyle and confident attitude, and new love. There had to be other shit going on, especially if he'd been planning it for months.

Wow, it felt good to get all that out like that. Thank you. I've been processing a LOT.

But yeah, I totally get what you're saying about parents and blaming others. It is a natural way for people to try to process. If our culture didn't make suicide so taboo, it wouldn't be like that. Not all cultures historically or currently have had the same issues with it.

 

[woxihuanni]

Yup. A detailed narrative with facts, evidence and witnesses will also help support what you present. Also a reminder of cases of convictions for online bullying and pushing to suicide. I read your other thread, would be great if you could manipulate her to repeat it near a hidden recording device. I'm sure you know her ego and can play it to your benefit.

Thank you! I doubt anybody will stick their neck in as witnesses, but just about everybody knows the situation. It's an open secret I'm a dead woman walking.