Discussion A final piece of art

[Walpurgisnacht]

So, I like to make music, it's basically the only thing that's ever given my existence any meaning.
A long time ago, I decided to make a song that I would release just before I ctb, I thought I wanted to leave something finished that could better explain the reasons why I chose to make the decision I did and what my life had really been like. I work on it now and again despite it being complete, and I think it'll probably keep changing up until the point I do leave.
Others have done this, such as Shiina Mota's beautiful 赤ペンをどうぞ, and I always found it to be far more profound than any written message or note could be for understanding someone's suffering, even if you didn't know them. Simple language isn't very good at communicating emotion, but art is the core of empathy in my opinion; you can learn things about a person you never would be able to understand otherwise through their art.

Do any of you have similar plans? Leaving behind a specific piece of your art when you ctb.
What are your opinions on doing this, do you consider it a moral thing to do, or do you think it's egotistical or self-centred?
I am interested to know.

(I apologise if this is not the correct place to post something like this, or if it has been discussed many times before and I haven't seen them, I am fairly new here.)

 

[Huntfish34]

I understand and agree with everything you said, I have similar plans myself. Have about 4 pages written down but along with that I have numerous songs that are close to my heart and a few pieces of art / gifts made from good friends of mine.

You are exactly right, anything more than a note will certainly be more profound and relevant. I've also wondered if it's moral, ego/ self centered but hey..... we will be long Gone at that point ya know? Just let your heart guide you and do the talking ♥

Thanks for sharing this, wish you Nothing but the best.

 

[leaf23]

I don't think it's egotistical/self-centered to do so. Art is a form of expression after all, and you're just expressing yourself, your emotions, this period in your life.. a sort of self-validation so to speak. Nothing wrong in wanting to be seen or recognized as you see yourself. Ideally, even the people you leave behind might even find comfort or better understanding in the works you share.

There are a lot of artists I admire that left behind works born from grief/depression. Like Sylvia Plath—the first time I read her was whoa, like electric. Same with some music I like like Palaye Royale.

As for myself, I don't think I'm creative enough for such an undertaking. Plus when I ctb I'd rather be forgotten entirely. I have a problem with attention towards me, but this is just me.

I wish you and @Huntfish34 luck in your songs

 

[Somber]

I intend to leave a USB stick behind containing practical information like bank details, passwords, copy of will and more personal information like an explanation for my decision, funeral details, music, pictures and other media that describe elements I can't accurately capture in my written notes.

 

[Walpurgisnacht]

You are exactly right, anything more than a note will certainly be more profound and relevant. I've also wondered if it's moral, ego/ self centered but hey..... we will be long Gone at that point ya know? Just let your heart guide you and do the talking ♥

You're totally right, yeah. It's something that I occasionally think about but, it won't matter after I've ctb regardless, and no one will hear this until I have already gone so it doesn't really matter now either. I would like to make it is as easy as possible for the people I leave behind if I can, but there will always be grief, can't stop that.
I think what leaf said is true, it could even potentially help anyone you leave; but I think at the very least, it won't hurt them.

I don't think it's egotistical/self-centered to do so. Art is a form of expression after all, and you're just expressing yourself, your emotions, this period in your life.. a sort of self-validation so to speak. Nothing wrong in wanting to be seen or recognized as you see yourself. Ideally, even the people you leave behind might even find comfort or better understanding in the works you share.

There are a lot of artists I admire that left behind works born from grief/depression. Like Sylvia Plath—the first time I read her was whoa, like electric. Same with some music I like like Palaye Royale.

Thank you both, I wish you the best too
While I am primarily doing this for myself, to express a lifetime of emotions I never otherwise could, I do have hope my loved ones could find some form of closure in it too. I suppose I won't ever know if it will help them grieve or not, but at the end of the day; I feel that anyone who ctbs deserve to be given the option leave something genuinely personal behind if they want to, since we generally can't express these things fully in peace while alive without fear of backlash.
My suicide note will be mostly untrue, because I want to use it to try and reduce the pain of grief the people who love me will experience once I'm gone rather than to express my real feelings, but I want to have the ability to actually express my real feelings as well. My life has been a slave to the world, and I don't want my death to be nothing but more of the same.

I intend to leave a USB stick behind containing practical information like bank details, passwords, copy of will and more personal information like an explanation for my decision, funeral details, music, pictures and other media that describe elements I can't accurately capture in my written notes.

I have a sort of similar setup where I've rigged my website to change the front page when I go, but all it really says is "I'm sorry, goodbye." I couldn't think of anything else to say, and after this long I probably won't ever either. I'm not good with words.

As for myself, I don't think I'm creative enough for such an undertaking. Plus when I ctb I'd rather be forgotten entirely. I have a problem with attention towards me, but this is just me.

Thinking about it more, if you did want to do something like this, the art doesn't really need to be made by you; like, if it resonates with you, it it was impactful to you, then leaving that, like Somber intends to, is just as a legitimate expression of your emotion as anything you could make yourself in my opinion. Media can be really formative regardless of if you're into making it or you prefer just to experience it. Though I completely understand why you'd rather leave nothing.

 

[Fwompje]

I intend to leave a USB stick behind containing practical information like bank details, passwords, copy of will and more personal information like an explanation for my decision, funeral details, music, pictures and other media that describe elements I can't accurately capture in my written notes.

that is such a good idea!

 

[spacehardware]

I think this is a beautiful idea. I love to paint, but hadn't considered making a 'final' piece. I think I actually prefer this idea to leaving a note. A picture is worth a thousand words, and all that.

 

[Archness]

It'd do that. But would it count?

My art is literally all words.

 

[Walpurgisnacht]

It'd do that. But would it count?

My art is literally all words.

Yeah, I mean, being an author or poet is a type of artist, right? Creative writing is an artistic skill. By "language can't convey emotion" I just meant descriptive writing/speech can't, that was just a poor choice of words by me.

 

[Archness]

It's fine. writing's a bit harder then it looks.

 

[Walpurgisnacht]

It's fine. writing's a bit harder then it looks.

I agree, I don't think I could be a writer at all.
I didn't mean to devalue your art form, I'm sorry if the OP came across that way.

 

[listless]

i think as a fellow artist, one of the kind of "check boxes" or lack of a better way to put it before i can ctb in my mind and feel at peace, i do want to create something im truly proud of that really shows how i feel to the world. i dunno if i could ever fully capture how i feel in words or any other medium besides illustration, but i have a feeling itll be a long time unfortunately til i can make something that really captures that feeling. i most likely would write something in addition, a letter maybe just for those closest to me, but anyone outside my closest circle, if they knew nothing about me but my last art piece that showed my pain, and maybe it could resonate with someone, thats all i could ask for.