A common problem for people that want to CTB

[justanotherhuman237]

throughout my life I've dealt with a lot of people that want to CTB and one thing that I always notice that holds a person back is their friends and family. it makes sense in some situations but usually those people are the reason that they want to CTB. Last year one of my bests friends went through with her plans and before that she told me that she had only been able to not do it for this long because she was scared of hurting me.

is there a way to avoid these feelings? im sure its not what people want to feel in their last seconds of life.

 

[howcanigo]

i just dont think its possible to avoid the guilt unless you truly have no one or are completely numb or 'heartless.'
humans live for other people, we do nearly everything for other people. we're social animals. thats why when people are cast out, hurt by other people, or have trouble managing with socializing, it may be the catalyst to truly wanting to ctb.

thats why loneliness is so powerful, wether perceived or true complete isolation. even just hanging around with one other living being makes a big difference. but it can't do everything unfortunately.

 

[SpiritualDeath]

If your family and friends (applies to any person actually) really love you they would want to set you free instead of binding you around them and forcing you to stay in this existence even when you're suffering, and you would want them to have freedom as well.

 

[ChronicallyCynical]

Unfortunately, feelings can't be turned off with the flick of a switch for most people.

Talking it out and gaining acceptance and understanding, I think is perhaps the most effective way, but sadly... that isn't always possible. In fact, it very rarely is.

I think, gradually someone might be able to see past their attachments - especially if their attachments were to people who drove them to ctb in the first place -, but that won't necessarily resolve the other issues.

Besides, I think the solution might require being tailored to the individual, there is no "one solution fits all". (Though I kinda' wish there was in times like these.)

 

[tera_forest]

Personally i've come to terms with the fact that I am going to be the cause of their grief. If it's seen as selfish then I accept the fact that I am a selfish person, but it is ultimately my choice if I want to live or die

 

[AshClouds]

throughout my life I've dealt with a lot of people that want to CTB and one thing that I always notice that holds a person back is their friends and family.

I hear you on that. That would hold me back too, I wouldn't want to cause others pain, but in my case I don't have close friends.

Sounds kinda messed up, but I don't really want to have any friends. It's one less thing to think about before I ctb.

 

[jar-baby]

one thing that I always notice that holds a person back is their friends and family. it makes sense in some situations but usually those people are the reason that they want to CTB

Relate really hard to that.
Unfortunately, I don't know how it can be avoided. Sometimes I tell myself that all pain is temporary anyway, but with that logic I may as well live for now since I'm gonna die at some point regardless. Harsh as it sounds, I think when it comes to the question of living, personal autonomy comes first. But it's not like realising that makes it any easier.

 

[Scythe]

I find talking it out with people helps, my closest online friends know I'm going to die, they also know a summary of my reasons to die, why it's better for me to die, and why I can't/don't want to be "fixed". I think the conversation helped both of us, they understand why I need to die and I find peace in that they understand why I need to do this and will have a slightly easier time moving on now that they know my reasoning.
My family however, are a lost cause, I just tell myself I'll be dead, it doesn't matter. I try not to think about it too much but it still gets to me sometimes.

 

[NeverMore21]

Only thing holding me back is the SI. I don't care about other's feelings.

 

[martinso67]

Parents would be the reason in this case. that if they know that you would do it or are doing it, then they would try to stop or call ambulance / police.
I think one should not involve their parents/friends. It's your own personal decision that sould be thought through not fast and consciously..

 

[inmyhead]

I do feel immense guilt knowing I am going to upset people in my life who care about me if I do decide to CTB. I have already hurt them from multiple attempts.

But at the same time… I know that eventually they will get over it. The same way we get over any person who passes. They will smile and they will laugh again, they will enjoy things again. Because that's what people do, they move on. It's a very comforting thought knowing that eventually people will move on and I will become a memory. Some memories will be happy, some sad, and there might be a painful sting when they think of me and how it all ended but that sting will lessen in time.