Everything is telling me to ctb & nothing for not. I have no place in humanity. I've dealt with mob harassment, spying, gaslight, manipulated, made fun of, & a pariah. I've either been ran off from jobs or harassed until I blow up. Last job started off with a person from a previous employer visited & stared at me with a big grin for 5 minutes them afterwards a person who's in charge of new employee training called me by the same name the previous employer used to harass & rum me off. Some snide comments from fellow workers. Ultimately it was my fault for getting fired, but they were wrong too. Even when or if I get another job the harassment will follow. I can't relocate & no reason to believe it would stop anyway. Life or fate wants me gone too. Unemployed & bought my annual new heater for my pump house a few days ago only to find the power to heater shut off & pump frozen & busted. Can't afford a new pump. No water for toilet or bathing, not like I care about myself. Still though sucks. I've had someone sabotage heater more than once in past, but think this time it's just life way of saying die mf! It's definitely time. If I can't get it done than life will just cause me to slowly die over a few weeks, so that's hopeful. I planned on setting a time delayed text so my cat won't suffer. I've done this in past. If I chicken out then I can cancel it. If it goes the way of slow then set it a couple weeks delayed. I can rig food & water for them & they can eat me too.
