Joey
Enlightened
- Jun 14, 2020
- 1,432
Me being all talk about being in Recovery and shit...kind of funny that I find myself here in the suicide section again.
Today I realize how really lonely I am and that I have nobody. I haven't hungout with anyone in a long time and yeah I have a couple good friends or two but I don't know what to feel...
I know I want to recover but after the whole running away incident that I've done back during September of last year....I ended up on the news. (Yep I was on the news and reported missing.)
I ended up in a Mental Health Ward for 2 weeks and despite people's other bad experiences, my experience ended up pretty good. But now due to asking for help, I now have to pay $52,000 because of the 2 week stay from the ward and it made me even more suicidal.
Pshhh what's the point of asking for help if the corrupt healthcare system that is America, will exploit you and bill you for high ass prices just to get help. My ambulance ride was over a $1000 and my health insurance didn't do shit. Fuck this country.
A part of me still wants to die and I'm not depressed in a way but I just want nothing to do with this life. I did have SN before but I disposed of it thinking that I could give life another chance. I did almost take it before.
I'm tempting either to buy another bottle of SN and not for to CTB impulsively but when shit hits the fan. Good thing it's quite easy to get in America and that's surprising.
I'm just debating to stick around or just move on to the next life...
Yeah...
Today I realize how really lonely I am and that I have nobody. I haven't hungout with anyone in a long time and yeah I have a couple good friends or two but I don't know what to feel...
I know I want to recover but after the whole running away incident that I've done back during September of last year....I ended up on the news. (Yep I was on the news and reported missing.)
I ended up in a Mental Health Ward for 2 weeks and despite people's other bad experiences, my experience ended up pretty good. But now due to asking for help, I now have to pay $52,000 because of the 2 week stay from the ward and it made me even more suicidal.
Pshhh what's the point of asking for help if the corrupt healthcare system that is America, will exploit you and bill you for high ass prices just to get help. My ambulance ride was over a $1000 and my health insurance didn't do shit. Fuck this country.
A part of me still wants to die and I'm not depressed in a way but I just want nothing to do with this life. I did have SN before but I disposed of it thinking that I could give life another chance. I did almost take it before.
I'm tempting either to buy another bottle of SN and not for to CTB impulsively but when shit hits the fan. Good thing it's quite easy to get in America and that's surprising.
I'm just debating to stick around or just move on to the next life...
Yeah...
