pain6batch9
Chronic
- Aug 25, 2024
- 184
Rather than start a whole bunch of different threads, I thought I'd use this one to tap out a few of my thoughts in public. Only so that they don't run out of control. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Sounds Sci-fi. So you can see the chaos.
So scientists have figured out that you can 'wash the brain' with the drugs used to induce labour. Something to do with removing old proteins, I'm not sure of the science. They want to use the technique to cure Alzheimer's. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) I wonder if they have a similar idea for tackling depression. I think If I could take a pill to make me 'normal' I would do it. Because I want to be better so badly. I hate the term normal. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Used by those types of people. I want to call it, a more efficient brain, not a normal one.
I couldn't do anything I wanted today. I couldn't eat. I couldn't write. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Too much noise going on in my head, but I'm running out of time. I put way to much pressure on it, because I said I would finish this chapter by the end of the month and that's in just under an hour. This self-imposed rule. They're all in my head. Kettle must face this way. Must watch this before that. Must eat this before that. Must do this thing before that. Door must be checked. Things must be certain way in fridge. Things must be certain way in room. Door must be locked. DON'T WEAR GREY. People can't be controlled. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) People can't be reasoned with. Avoid many people. People don't know me. I don't know people. Door must be locked. I want people.
I want my brain to be clean. I want to disinfect my mind from the stench of these horrible thoughts. I want to scrub it clean. Purity. I can't be clean in my mind. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) I want my mind to be more efficient at self-repair. Activate nano-technologies. Like, imagine the government offered you ÂŁ6m to give to your family, so they could experiment with nano-tech on your brain? Would you do it? I bloody well would. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) At least then, they could fix themselves with conventional medicines.
Maybe there is no cure. Maybe I'm on my own. Suffering as the new standard. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Door must be LOCKED.
So scientists have figured out that you can 'wash the brain' with the drugs used to induce labour. Something to do with removing old proteins, I'm not sure of the science. They want to use the technique to cure Alzheimer's. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) I wonder if they have a similar idea for tackling depression. I think If I could take a pill to make me 'normal' I would do it. Because I want to be better so badly. I hate the term normal. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Used by those types of people. I want to call it, a more efficient brain, not a normal one.
I couldn't do anything I wanted today. I couldn't eat. I couldn't write. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Too much noise going on in my head, but I'm running out of time. I put way to much pressure on it, because I said I would finish this chapter by the end of the month and that's in just under an hour. This self-imposed rule. They're all in my head. Kettle must face this way. Must watch this before that. Must eat this before that. Must do this thing before that. Door must be checked. Things must be certain way in fridge. Things must be certain way in room. Door must be locked. DON'T WEAR GREY. People can't be controlled. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) People can't be reasoned with. Avoid many people. People don't know me. I don't know people. Door must be locked. I want people.
I want my brain to be clean. I want to disinfect my mind from the stench of these horrible thoughts. I want to scrub it clean. Purity. I can't be clean in my mind. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) I want my mind to be more efficient at self-repair. Activate nano-technologies. Like, imagine the government offered you ÂŁ6m to give to your family, so they could experiment with nano-tech on your brain? Would you do it? I bloody well would. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) At least then, they could fix themselves with conventional medicines.
Maybe there is no cure. Maybe I'm on my own. Suffering as the new standard. (DELETED IRRELEVANT) Door must be LOCKED.