I can relate. I'm in Ireland and we're a few weeks or so behind ye're schedule of restrictions in the UK. Suddenly I have people messaging me trying to make plans. Lockdown hasn't really changed my life, I work from home. But I've come to some decisions over the past year and now that "normal" life is trying to resume, I both don't want it to or belong in it anymore. Lockdown pushed me to do what I've always found was one of the hardest steps when you're planning to CTB, cut people off. But it's done and I feel there's no going back. The stress of life trying to resume around me is like a lead weight in my stomach. This monster we carry on our backs, depression, is a right bastard sometimes.