Venting Once again held captive in the house by my “mother”

[madbananas]

TW: details of physical abuse
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Had to try and push her away from the door but she tackles me. She refuses to phone a doctor because it’s when I’m in distress but will phone her friend and say that he will come round and “control” me. As soon as I get the door somewhat open (to get myself out), she strangles me, whacks me over the head and then drags me along the floor by my hair. Stamps on my belly and chest then again when I’m trying to get away from her, she jumps on my back and restrains me. She then says (when I push her away in self defence) “oh how will you feel when you kill your own mother”. So then her friend comes round and she starts all the crying and then makes me out to be the one completely at fault and “crazy”. Now she’s telling her friend that she wants to get me sectioned. I’m financially dependent on her at the moment so I don’t really have a courage to leave.

 

[GottaGo]

Dude that’s the worst. Your mom is terrible. Would calling child protective services help? I wish you can get some money get out of there soon. Starving on your own is better than living there :(
Try to record all the evidence of her abusing you. Pictures or voice recording, And hand them to all her friends and the police. If you are going to leave in the future make sure she get what she deserves first.

 

[madbananas]

Dude that’s the worst. Your mom is terrible. Would calling child protective services help? I wish you can get some money get out of there soon. Starving on your own is better than living there :(
Try to record all the evidence of her abusing you. Pictures or voice recording, And hand them to all her friends and the police. If you are going to leave in the future make sure she get what she deserves first.

Sadly I’m an adult. It’s a totally codependent relationship we have. I’m also so depressed that I don’t have the motivation to do anything about it and I’m also scared about the repercussions of contacting the police. Mainly because I’ve acted in self defence and it would be hard to prove.

 

[botanormal]

I'm so so sorry you have to go through such horrible abuse at the hand of your own mother. Our parents are supposed to be the ones who support us unconditionally, treatment like that is never okay. I really wish you had the ability to get out of that situation, it must be such a difficulty for you if you're stuck there because of financial reasons. I hope you're able to become financially independent through some means, because having to endure such a nasty living situation is not something anybody should have to do. You do not by any means deserve such horrific treatment. I wish there were a way to make it all better, but at the very least I'm happy you were able to talk about this with us. If you ever need to talk about anything, anything at all, we're all here for you, okay? I'm sending you all my love right now, and I really wish you the best of luck with your situation.

 

[Symbiote]

If you have bruises, take a picture of it. Contact the Domestic Abuse Hotline. Could also get a voice-activated recorder and stick it in your pocket so it'll document the abuse. Your mom should be the one that needs to be sectioned.

 

[madbananas]

I'm so so sorry you have to go through such horrible abuse at the hand of your own mother. Our parents are supposed to be the ones who support us unconditionally, treatment like that is never okay. I really wish you had the ability to get out of that situation, it must be such a difficulty for you if you're stuck there because of financial reasons. I hope you're able to become financially independent through some means, because having to endure such a nasty living situation is not something anybody should have to do. You do not by any means deserve such horrific treatment. I wish there were a way to make it all better, but at the very least I'm happy you were able to talk about this with us. If you ever need to talk about anything, anything at all, we're all here for you, okay? I'm sending you all my love right now, and I really wish you the best of luck with your situation.

Thank you so much, that means a lot. Just can’t believe my life has turned out this way. All I want is to feel cared for by someone and I resent my “mother” because of everything she does.

 

[Gnip]

Assault. Unlawful restraint. Kidnapping. Depending on your jurisdiction, you are describing some serious crimes being committed against you, and it is illegal to assault a family member in many nations.

So far as financial dependence is concerned, you may be entitled to her financial support through a lawsuit or some sort of legal action taken on your behalf.

Once, my father threatened to punch me in my own apartment. I told him that if he crossed that line or even threatened such violence against me where I was paying to live separately from him that I would call the police and have him arrested for assault and battery, ending his career as an elementary school principal who was notorious for physically striking students in his own schools.

Place her in a situation where if she tries to get you sectioned, she will have to be clinically evaluated as well. If you get sectioned, tell them you inherited your issues from her, forcing her into having to share your situation instead of her making you share her situation.

 

[madbananas]

Assault. Unlawful restraint. Kidnapping. Depending on your jurisdiction, you are describing some serious crimes being committed against you, and it is illegal to assault a family member in many nations.

So far as financial dependence is concerned, you may be entitled to her financial support through a lawsuit or some sort of legal action taken on your behalf.

Once, my father threatened to punch me in my own apartment. I told him that if he crossed that line or even threatened such violence against me where I was paying to live separately from him that I would call the police and have him arrested for assault and battery, ending his career as an elementary school principal who was notorious for physically striking students in his own schools.

Place her in a situation where if she tries to get you sectioned, she will have to be clinically evaluated as well. If you get sectioned, tell them you inherited your issues from her, forcing her into having to share your situation instead of her making you share her situation.

I legitimately almost lost it. Went through to her and started shouting and crying at her. She then says she is scared I’m going to kill her. Not being funny, but she’s the one who physically stops me from leaving the house and then attacks me. When I become distressed, I start hitting myself and yes, at times, have ripped up newspapers, books and put a knee through a door. Which I know is wrong as well but I’ve never went for her and mental health services are refusing to give me regular support. Now I’m just in my room and not speaking to her obviously. I’m so devastated because she never takes any accountability for her actions. I feel like everything has built up in me and I’m so trapped that the anger is coming out, thankfully in self harm rather than attacking others (unless as self defence).

 

[Gnip]

I legitimately almost lost it. Went through to her and started shouting and crying at her. She then says she is scared I’m going to kill her. Not being funny, but she’s the one who physically stops me from leaving the house and then attacks me. When I become distressed, I start hitting myself and yes, at times, have ripped up newspapers, books and put a knee through a door. Which I know is wrong as well but I’ve never went for her and mental health services are refusing to give me regular support. Now I’m just in my room and not speaking to her obviously. I’m so devastated because she never takes any accountability for her actions. I feel like everything has built up in me and I’m so trapped that the anger is coming out, thankfully in self harm rather than attacking others (unless as self defence).

Shouting and crying at somebody is not a crime unless a threat against them is made. Otherwise, the line is crossed when you put your hands on somebody or physically retrain and obstruct them (which could be kidnapping depending on the situation). You have said you are an adult. That means she has no legal power to block you from leaving the house, and is committing a crime if she does.

You are not responsible for her subjective feelings, which she can completely make up. If you yell at her "I'm going to KILL you!," that is criminal threatening and a different matter.

She's the mother, you're the daughter. Any responder to any domestic disturbance who has any sense will instantly know your mother is the one in the position of power in the relationship, the initiator and abuser, and the creator of the unhealthy codependence between you. Since you are trying to get out of her house and she is physically blocking you from doing so, she is the one committing the crime.