marie71
Member
- Jan 6, 2019
- 7
hey guys im new here and am really grateful to this site,iva had dual diagnosis meaning drug addiction with mental illness for my whole life,you know the story,ive tried every drug,psych med,pills,and even ECT that fucked me up even more,i have about 2 or 3 panic-anxiety attacks a day,im not kidding,my brain wants out but my body is so damn stubborn with it just wont let me die and im more than ready,off topic go see the movie suicide theory,ive tried antifreeze but just got dialysis and a month stay,tried other things too,im just trapped cuz I go to a methadone clinic im on 110 mg and am addicted to Xanax or any kind of benzo that I get off the streets but the clinic doesn't know or else I would get thrown out,ive tried to get off benzos,no go,i have bad insurance ive tried on my own but with my panic disorder I cant get off these things and of course theres other reasons I don't want to bore you with but im scared to be alive to wake up frightens the hell out of me,anyway,sorry such a long post just wanted to say hi and vent a little.thanx
